Welcome once again, to MST country.... and on a side note, cynics corner is comming. and it will be big. (I want the fucking title of longest Disclaimer. I refuse to let Countersync take it) ****** Note: The information contained in this message may be privileged and confidential and protectedfrom disclosure. If the reader of this message is not the intended recipient, an employee or agent responsible for delivering this message to the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any dissemination, distribution or copying of this communication is strictly prohibited, and will result in prompt castration. If you have received this in error, please notify us immediately by replying to the message and deleting it from your computer. We will be by shortly to pick you up. Thank You, AGNPH Secuirity ***** *THIS LEMON IS NOT MINE, AND IS THE SOLE PROPERTY OF [Sad Mudokon, J, and a guy named Robert]* *roll disclaimers* Thats right my friends, it is time for a bit of cynicism, criticism, and a strong case of opinions. **Stupid ass legal disclaimer** The views shown in this broadcast are that of me, and a couple other people who I think are cool or stupid, not those of the general consensus of AGNPH or its affiliates. The language in this is for people who can handle it, and speaks of content not for those that don't want to read it. I take no responsibility for::: induced vomiting, the national debt, all that is sane in the world, pascal, the hell hole known as North-Dakota, The Wrath Of BOB, over-whelming fear of dolphins, non-caffinated soda, Hysterical laughter as I try to use a different words then cunt, pussy and fuck-box, pointers, near-end-cross-talk, Cynics Corner fans, morals of the great Sewer People, sheer hate as you try to read the dribble, tofu, EIGRP, 10 Base X ethernet, EIA/TIA 568B, the word clitoris, the religion of cat raping, plastic steel rods, iostream.h, Grape soda, Morning Star, Raku glazes, Apple II-e's, Quik Sort, Apstring.h, Pokemon porn or any opinions made after reading this. This isn't your average disclaimer....This is a NEW disclaimer! Chalk full of warnings and jokes, and that "Not over 18" bit that they all have. Register now, and get the full and zanny version of Lemon - Disclaimer 2.1! All characters/ ideas in this that aren't mine by law, they're someone elses, unless of course they are public intelectual property, like the song John - Jacob - Jingle - Heimer - Schmidt or Acme Co., then I claim inventing them. However, if one wishes to use the characters in this story, thats fine. Just ask/beg/plead/worship me first. THIS DOCUMENT IS PROVIDED FOR INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. INFORMATION PROVIDED IN THIS DOCUMENT IS PROVIDED 'AS IS' WITHOUT WARRANTY OF ANY KIND, EITHER EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO THE IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE AND FREEDOM FROM INFRINGEMENT. The user assumes the entire risk as to the accuracy and the use of this document. This document may be copied and distributed subject to the following conditions: 1. All text must be copied without modification and all pages must be included 2. All copies must contain 'Doppelganger is my Demi-God, and the coolest person on AGNPH'. 3. This document may not be distributed for profit, unless sent to me, Dop so whatdya think? oh wait, this is supposed to be a MST, sorry. Enough disclaimer... This lemon is rated::::::Sour, MSTed, and Painful to read. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ The cammera fades in, showing a small phalic shaped object, orbiting around the planet USENET, tied by a long peice of rubber band to alt.games.nintendo.pokemon.hentai. The cammera slowly zooms into a window on the object, until it is inside. Sitting, reading a copy of 'Segfault', was N.O.T.E., in what appeared to be the control room. He looked up as the lift door slid open, revealing the dynamic duo, Jay and Silent Bob. Jay proceded to poke the door, examining it. Bob lit a sig, and sat down next to N.O.T.E. "I take it the eternaly stupid one called you up to MST too?" NOTE asked dryly. Bob pointed to the name patch on his shirt. [Silent Bob] [MSTer ] "Oh great, he made us a regular cast? Fucking wonderfull. First he leaves me out of his Cynics Live adventures, and pokes around in getting to the next Cynics Corner." He looked around. "No dog dude?" "I'm right here, trying to gain control of this thing." Dogbert popped out of the circut access pannel under the main control board. "Of course it's not working, as that would be an interestin story line for us." "Okay, enough talking about shit, lets get to the fucking." Jay, as always, being subtle. "Calm down hormone boy.' NOTE stood. "He's doing this just to irritate us you realize." The vid screen blinked. "Uh, Hello? Uh, I'd like a large double cheeze pizza and some of the magical letuce, and uh... hey, is this 666-Piza?" "Dop, next time, try writing in some comedy." Dogbert plopped down in the chair by the door. The video screen blurred, and doppelganger sat frowning. "Well it was hard to top Charlies Angels damnit." "Just shut the fuck up and get to the lemon." NOTE glared at the changling. "Im already behind in my Cynics Stories." "Fuck you very much too NOTE. And I shall get to the lemon. Or... Lemons as it is. For today, you will be MSTing not one, not 2, but a tripple feature of lemons!" They stared at him silently. NOTE spoke up. "3? The hell are you smoking?" "What? Oh come off it, you like lemons. And these are the best... at being the worst." He laughed maniacaly for a few minutes, until he realized they were all staring. "Okay, fine, here's the deal. You must sit through 2 lemons. You may leave for one of them, as I have replacements in place for you. The first lemon today, is called Bulbasaurs Vengence." "Oh BOB no..." NOTE murmered. "What's it about?" Dogbert looked over at the alien "You'll see, now off ya go." *enter the theater, with many a curse* > Bulbasaur's Vengeance > by Sad Mudokon |sad_mudokon@hotmail.com.| > NOTE:Why do I get the feeling we all should be sad.... Dogbert: So what IS this about? Jay: Yeah, what kinda fucking's in this bitch? NOTE: A guy bulbasaur and Pikachu going at it. Tedious, not sour. > Description: Bulbasaur has been one-upped by Pikachu for the last time, and > decicides to reap his vengeance; the worst way he can... > Dogbert: (Nick Diamond) Here, in CELEBRITY DEATH MATCH! NOTE:This would get tons of cash in paperview. Jay : Fuck yeah, I get those channels for free dude. Silent Bob is a fucking electronic jedi and shit. NOTE: We've seen the movie. Vibrator, toaster, VCR.... > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > Warning: This is a lemon. Generally, if you are here, you are most likely > either over 18, hopelessly lost, or a sick little puppy. > Dogbert : Or stuck on board a sattilite orbiting a town thats obsesed with small furry creatures having sex with other furry creatures. > This story is about > nonconsentual sex between two Pokemon. It contains violence, rape, and > Pikachu getting the crap beaten out of him a few times. Don' say I dinna > warn ye. > Jay: Shit sounds kinky. NOTE: Does Yaoi mean anything to you? Jay: Dont like chinese food. > It is also (dun dun dun DUN dun...) my first lemon. > NOTE: Playing at drive in's and B-Movie theaters, summer of '00 Dogbert: Does no one realize first lemons are always horrid? NOTE: What do you want, no one to have a first lemon? Dogbert:Yep. NOTE: But without first lemons, there could be no second, third, or any lemons. Dogbert:*grin*Yep. NOTE: And no MST's.... damn, you're a genius dog. > So be gentle, please! > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ > > > > > "Bulbasaur, I choose you!" > With a queer, baroque screaming, the inky blackness sliced open, fading > under the a blazing spear of light as Bulbasaur erupted from the humming > pokeball, a snarl twisting his features. > All: ....... Jay: What the fuck? NOTE: Why do I feel this guy writes bad poetry too. > Leaflets shuddering in rage, > Bulbasaur threw open his mouth, and, eyes red, howled a "Bulbasaur!" of > challenge to his enemy, the- - Onyx, towering twenty feet above him. > "...s-saur..." Soulless black eyes stared down, and the Onyx sneered. > The proverbial other shoe fell. Bulbasaur felt suddenly sick, his insides > twisting in dismay. > Dogbert: I wonder if other authors use an inline Thesaurs.... NOTE: I hope not. I have a feeling we'll be here for awhile. > Each black, diamond like chink of the Onyx's body was > flawless, sheer black armor of unparalelled sheen; flashing light caught his > sight. Bulbasaur could see himself in the harsh facets, he was cowering- no! > NOTE: No! He was masturbaiting! Jay: What? > He would cower to nothing! he was a 'Saur, greatest of the plant Pokemon! No > moving rock would take him down! > Bob: Not even an avalanche. For he is super-weed. Dogbert: Not so silent today? Bob: *shug* Jay: Super weed... reminds me Bob, we gotta stop by Loco Pete's. > "Saur!!" Legs pumping frantically, Bulbasaur charged. The Onyx burbled > warningly. > Jay: Burbled? What the fuck is Burbled? NOTE: It's like comming. WIthout the goo. Jay: Just get to the fucking. > "Bulbasaur! Razor Leaf!" > Bulbasaur ground his teeth. Sometimes Ash could be denser than- than, an > Onyx. > Dogbert: And as hard as one... Oh how those nights 'stood' out. > Sighing, Bulbasaur relaxed his leaves. Bulb shuddering, Bulbasaur > howled and, grunting, let fly with a flurry of woody green blades. > NOTE: Apparently his thesuarus didn't have the word 'leaf' in it. Jay: Damnit, I want some sex. None of this pussy animal fighting. What was the fucking supposed to be in this one? NOTE: A guy pokemon rapping another guy pokemon. Jay: What! FUck this, let's use our leave pass Silent Bob. Bob:*shrug* Jay: The next one better have some titties and some sloppy shit. Dogbert: Yes. Let's all pray for a scat lemon. *Jay and Silent Bob leave, leaving the 2 alone.* NOTE: Who do we get now that they leave? > Onyx's > shiny black armor suddenly became considerably less so, and, eyes crushed > closed, Onyx roared. > "Bulbasaur! Another Razor Leaf!" > "Saur!" Bulbasaur gathered himself again, facing the shaking Onyx. > NOTE: Oh yes, those Bulbasaur penises just make everything tremble in excitment. > Growling, Bulbasaur inhaled, and, straining, brought his magazine of > vegitarian missiles to bear. A second too late, Bulbasaur heard a dank > swish. A two foot wide section of living rock smashed into Bulbasaur's face, > and Bulbasaur flew half an Onyx-length, flipping several times and > faceplanting in a rising cloud of dust on the cavern floor. > Dogbert: Shall we comment on the '2 foot of living rock'? NOTE: Nah. Obvious jokes need be left to die..... > "Oh! Bulbasaur!" > NOTE: ....But sometimes they call out to be fucked with. > Bulbasaur thrust a shaking claw under himself, and started to haul himself > up. Coughing, he cracked open reddened eyes to the quaking Onyx. He would > not stop. He would not back down. > NOTE: He'd just beg for his life. > Ash would see just what kind of a warrior > he had received so long ago at the Pokemon health spa. He would show them > all. > Out of the corner of his eye, Bulbasaur caught a movement. Ash had > something in his hand- > Dogbert: Wait for it...... > Bulbasaur gasped, struggling up. No! No! > NOTE: Now we have sex. I repeat, sex has been confirmed. *theater door opens. In walks Sifl and Chester from the show Sifl and Olly.* Dogbert: They sent us socks? NOTE: funny socks. Trust me. Sifl: How's it going? NOTE: Not bad.... but wait a few minutes, and it will be. Chester: Like blue cheese... yeah. Dogbert: We turned in a junkie and a mute for a pair of socks, one of which is mentaly lacking? NOTE: dont you love when you trade up? > "Bulbasaur, return!" > No! Bulbasaur howled "BulBA!" Red light wrapped around him, and the air > filled with a queer, baroque screaming. > Dogbert: SO much for thesuarus. Thats the second time he's used Baroque. Sifle: WHat the hell are we watching? NOTE: A lemon. Chester: heh, sour... pewha. Sifl: Shadup Chester. And I know its a lemon... WHat kind? NOTE: Poke-Yaoi. Sifl: Oh. Greeeaaat. > No! It wasn't fair! This was HIS > battle! Body twisting in the pokeball's grip, Bulbasaur flung out a > desperate vine whip, grasping desperately at the retreating world. The last > thing he heard before the black nothingness of the Pokeball engulfed him was > Ash's high, whiny voice screaming "Pikachu, go..." > Silf: The fucking plant should be greatful. The fucking mouse will get the shit kicked out of him. Dogbert: But thats logical. This is a lemon. > "GROARrrrr!!" With a pathetic gargling, Onyx's huge head slammed into the > hard floor, eyes unfocused and dazed. Chunk by groaning chunk, Onyx > collapsed, and did not rise again. > Chester: That shouldn't happen. Pikachu is electric type and shouldn't hurt Onyx. Sifl: Quit making yourself look like an ass. Chester: 'Kay... who...... ya.... NOTE: Ritilan. > "Yay, we did it!" Grinning (inanely), Ash threw himself into a pirouette, > flashing an ecstatic victory sign in... victory. > NOTE: A breaking story here at cnn, Ash Catchem IS a gay Ballet dancer, as the speculation told.... > "PikaAAah." Pikachu reeled weakly. Ash watched, confused; Pikachu pulled a > piroette as perfect as Ash's, and slammed into the dirt with a thin, > wavering "Pikaaaa..." tail kinked over his flattened ears. > NOTE: And apparently he abuses his pokemon, making them train in his strange gay Ballet, to what ends, cnn has not learned at this time. > "Oh! Hey Pikachu, what's wrong with you?" Ash knelt down before Pikachu's > prostrate form, running a hand through his fur. > Silf: Fuck, we got here just in time. Dogbert: SOmetimes... thesuarus' just plain work against ya. > Pikachu only twitched his > ear and groaned an exhausted "chuUu..." > "Pikachu put out his all in the battle, Ash." Brock said, looking over > Ash's shoulder. "Pikachu is an electric Pokemon; it was inevitable that it > would get the crap beaten out of it by such a strong rock Pokemon." Ash > looked up, consternation twisting his features. "Oh. I guess I forgot." > Chester: Yeah NOTE: Hmm... he's the pokemon master wannabe... and he forgot something a pot smocking sock knows? > "Remember, an electric attack doesn't effect rock Pokemon. Remember when > you fought my Onyx? Although my Onyx was a lot more powerful than a wild > Onyx..." Brock shook his head. "And when you think about it; Onyx is the > longest, densest Pokemon we know of so far- and Pikachu, for all his > experience in battle, is still just a little lightning rat. > Dogbert:(brock) and there is no way in hell that rat can have an Onyx stuffed up his ass, all the way. > I'm surprised he > didn't lose to such a strong Pokemon. He was lucky he didn't get his ass > KO'ed ..." > Ash looked up, angry. "Ahhw! Luck had nothing to do with it! Pikachu won by > heart alone..." Ash, Brock and Misty walked on, fuming and arguing (as > usual). Ash, cradling a shuddering Pikachu, was so busy fending off Misty's > verbal assault that he never noticed the slight, repetitive, angry rocking > of the sullen red pokeball at his belt... > Sifl: I knew those things we're more than just pokemon holders, they're vibrators. > (Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! Damn that fucking Pikachu! F-f-fuck!! Fuck him > and that asshole Ash! Damn them ALL! That was my battle! MY battle! Damn > them! Ash always toting on that retarded Pikachu. Well, he would pay for his > insolance. He would pay for the insult he had delivered. Imagine, bieng > one-upped by a fucking lightning rat! Oh, he would pay. They all would. Him > and that fucking Pikachu. Especially Pikachu. Damn them ALL!) > NOTE: Hmm... can we tell this is a rape fic yet? > > > Ash smiled at the idyllic sylvan setting. The sun sent soft sheets of > filtered green light through the soft leaf cover. Vibrant grass marked the > edge of their meadow resting place. Ash sighed happily, and reached out to > rub Pikachu's soft, staticy fur. > Chester: Staticy... its all like wanking and soft and... yeah it just feels good. Dogbert: They hell you give him? Silf: A job on our show. > Ash's questing hand grasped unregistering > for a long moment, before Ash turned, confused, to peer at the portion of > flattened grass where Pikachu had been resting peacefully. Pikachu was > trodding slowly across the springy grass, towards the sapling girt edge of > the forest. "Pikachu! Where are you going?" Ash looked up, to see Pikachu > turn to look at him. > NOTE: (pikachu) Oh, nowhere. Just to jack off and get raped by another pokemon. Ill be back for dinner. > "Pika!" Pikachu stated happily, if tiredly, making holding and eating > motions with his small, stubby hands. > Silf(Ash), Oh, you want to give me oral. > "I think Pikachu wants one of those apples from the tree we passed a little > while ago. Don't worry, Ash, it's not that far away." Brock shrugged, > contemplating. "You know Ash, Pikachu should have a few apples; a varied > diet is important to a Pokemon. > Dogbert: Be it apples, donoughts, manmeat, fish tacos, or even dog food. > A Pokemon shouldn't eat Pokemon Chow all the > time, no matter how much care is put into making it..." Ash nodded, turning > to Pikachu. > "Be careful, Pikachu. Remember, you're not up to full strength yet. Look > out for other Pokemon, you're so weak y ou might not be able to stand up to > an attacker like you always do..." > NOTE: He has a thesuars but not a spell checker. Amazing. > Pikachu looked slightly miffed, but > nodded an acnowledging "Pika," And bounded joyfully through the taller > grass, tail springing and bobbing. > NOTE: I think I've figured something out. Sifl: We're in hell? NOTE: No, that was last week. I just realized how bad lemon writers make suspense. They think of the main scene, and make the rest of the lemon opposite in tone. Dogbert: Like a president's campagin and the actual term in office? Chester: Or like a quater pounder commercial. Sifl : Thats pre-cooking wait Chester. Chester: Still, it's over a quater pound with all the cheese and bread and stuff. It's to heavy sometimes. NOTE: For some reason I want to keep reading... just to stop the talking.... > A small flight of Pidgeys fluttered into > the sky as Ash waved happily to Pikachu's retreating tail. > Sifl:(Ash) I KNEW it was a dildo and not a tail. > Rock. Bump. Rock. Rock. Bump. > NOTE: Why bolders do not make a good sex aid. > The meditative, hypnotic rustle of the > feathered grass muffled the crunching sound of the dirt rasping against the > rocking pokeball. > Dogbert: What the hell? There is something called simplicity in descriptions. NOTE: Thats for good lemon writers, remember? > A barely noticed flash of light erupted briefly from the > Pokeball, and Bulbasaur tumbled to the hard soil. Rubbing his head joyously > against the silty earth, > Chester: Yeah, mother nature has a great poon... Sifl: You aren't the only one that thinks it apparently. > Bulbasaur reveled briefly in his freedom. Rising on > dusty claws, Bulbasaur quickly surveyed the surroundings, and, freedom > undetected, slipped into the soft grassy border of the forest. Following the > heady smell of overripe apples. > NOTE: Granny Smith is one horny bitch. > The old apple tree loomed high, rough bark perfect for little Pikachu claws > and apples gleaming maddeningly. Pikachu gazed up at the pale fleshed fruit, > tail high and twitching. > Dogbert: Since when do apples make people get off? Chester: 5th grade NOTE: Since steve Jobbs contracted that porn programing team. Sifl: You ever feel you're the only normal one sometimes? > A sudden flare of sunlight lit the grandeur of the > apple tree. Pikachu pressed his cheek against the sun warmed bark, and, > digging his claws into the fiberous runnels in the old bark, began to pull > himself up the tree. Foot by foot, he ascended the rough bark, and, grunting > "chu", pulled himself into the crown. Nails scrabbling against the old wood, > Pikachu ran along a thick limb, towards the clump of shining green leaves. > Emerging into green and light, Pikachu stared at the perfect red and yellow > apple dangling enticingly in front of him, nestled among a bright green > bower, scant inches away. Almost tasting it, Pikachu reached out for the > apple. > NOTE: I feel a metaphor.... > Eluding his grasp, the apple swayed in the branches, just out of > reach. > Dogbert: If it is a metaphor, whoever the guy is, he's hung like a gnat. Chester: Gnats tast good. Gee-Nat. Sifl: Cres Chester. Cres. > "Kachu- Pi. Pikapika."Ears waggling, Pikachu stared at the sunlit apple. > Firmly wrapping his kinked tail around the supple limb, Pikachu reached out > again. The stem gave way under sharp little talons. Beaming, Pikachu held > the sun warmed apple against his fur; Pressing his face against the smooth > fruit, Pikachu let his eyes close and smiled peacefully. > Silf: What is up with this guy and apples? NOTE: maybe he took American Pie way to seriously. > Bulbasaur stared malevolently at Pikachu's furry yellow body. He ground his > teeth in hate, entire body tense and mind buzzing blackly. > NOTE: Thats just an unfair sterotype of pissed off Bulbasaur's. Dogbert: The fact they will rape pikachu's when pissed off? NOTE: No, that they have to be in a black mindset to do so. Why not purple, or red? Dogbert: Ah, racial commentary. Sifl: Dude's a racist and a bad lemon writer? Chester: Like Margret Shott. NOTE: Shut up sock boy. > Every muscle > twitched and shuddered as he gathered himself. Nearly crying with gleeful, > hateful anticipation, Bulbasaur narrowed his eyes, harsh, burning thoughts, > images of hate and carnage flashing across the beautiful rage flowing > through every vein, burning every neuron. > Dogbert: Following the clockwork Orange priniciple, wouln't this make him sickened by violence? NOTE: Not if you follow the Charles Manson principle. Chester: Or Lobster principle. NOTE: Lobster? Chester: Yeah, you like cook them alive, and they all scream 'ahhhhhhyyyyyyyyyy', but you dont hear them, and they die in the water, then you eat them. Sifl: Look Chester, Shiny keys... Chester: hehe, shinny. > He would hear Pikachu scream, > taste his blood, and reap his vengeance on Pikachu's struggling, crying > body. Muscles exploding, > Silf: The Attack of the Pre-Mature Ejaculator. > Bulbasaur threw himself at Pikachu. Pikachu's ear > twitched once, idly, as Bulbasaur bore down on him. > Dogbert: That gives the impression that the rat wanted it. NOTE: Seems like it. I know I'd scream like a sloppy bitch if a walking plant was comming to rape me. > "pikaaAAAHH!!" Pikachu screamed as he was smashed from behind. > Chester: Smashed... like shag.... hehyeah. > He flailed > desperately, flying out of the tree. > Silf: Waitwaitwait. You're telling me that tubby assed pokemon can jump that high? NOTE: I'm not, the writer is. Dogbert: I recognize his work. I think he did the writing for 'Independence Day'. NOTE: But that didn't have an anal rape scene. Dogbert: Didn't buy the DVD did you? NOTE: No... Dogbert: Well, when you watch it, you realize you must have been raped to buy it. > Cartwheeling, Pikachu fell, slamming > forcefully into the grassy earth. His apple bounced several times, coming to > rest under a bush. > Chester: BOBBIT! > Rising on shaking legs, Pikachu, dazed and battered, > gazed upwards at the indistinguishable, malevolent form in the canopy, > staring down at him with bared teeth. > NOTE: Yes folk's, he pissed off a monkey too. > Pikachu drew back in confusion as Bulbasaur descended, rappeling out of > the canopy with his vine whips. Daintily, he set claws to the earth, and > waited, smiling, eyes blazing with an unholy light. Pikachu cocked his head, > confused. > Dogbert: Okay, Bulbasaur hurting you, looking evil. Do you stay and wonder what the fuck is going on, or make like a male whore, running from Eddie Murphy? > Feet quiet on the grasses, Pikachu padded forward, until the two > Pokemon were almost touching. > NOTE: Once again giving the slight subconscious thought that the mouse wants it. Dogbert: Sick thought. Who gets off on snuff? Chesterl: Tobbaco lovers that sploodge easy. They read through, looking for tobbaco plant sex, and then come before they can find it. > "-Pika?"Bulbasaur didn't move. Pikachu felt his fur rise at Bulbasaur's > expression. Suddenly, he really didn't want to be there. Backing away, > Pikachu suddenly flattened his ears. He started a low, whistling whine in > the back of his throat. "Piiiiiiii..." > Chester: Pod Person! Sifl: Guy gets his rape scenes from old B-Movies. Un-Cress. > Bulbasaur 's bulb began to quiver slightly. > NOTE: The plant's gonna 'spill his seed'. Dogbert: Before he 'Plows the Field'? Sifl: He's about to 'reap what he sowed'. Chester: Or make some cream corn. All mushy, and creamy. Dogbert: Can't you be more like Silent Bob? You know... Silent? > His face screwed up in > concentration, eyes narrowing and mouth cracking open. "Bul-ba..." Small > green thornlets began to push themselves out of Bulbasaur's leafy back. > "...SAUR!!" Suddenly bristling with a full compliment of razor leaves, > Bulbasaur howled, firing. > Dogbert: His come is his Razor Leaf attack? Chester: That's not in any pokedex I've seen. Sploodge attack, heyah. > "PIKAA!!" Throwing himself into an agility maneuver, Pikachu ran. Razor > leaves half buried themselves in the ground all around him with little > pilth, pilth noises. > NOTE: Pilth? Chester: Like Splithhhhhhh-shmunp. NOTE: Thanks for the clarification. > Legs flashing, Pikachu fled, into the forest: away from > his apparently insane assailant, toward Ash. > Dogbert: While flashing his legs? What, he's flriting? Sifl: I like the fact he flee's to Ash. Like that puss can save him. NOTE: Who'd you run to? Sifl: Not a weak little bastard, that's for sure. > Laughing manically, Bulbasaur struck. A vine whip snapped out, catching > Pikachu across the knees. Pikachu gasped, flipping violently several times. > Digging runnels in the sod, Pikachu scrambled to get up. > NOTE: Runnels? God, do not use words like that again you over-read ass. Dogbert: My question is, did he catch the rat, or trip him. Sifl: Either way it's cres Violence. Dogbert: Cres? Sifl: YOu dont know cres? Let me explain. Cres is like... hmmm..... I know, Chester, sing with me. Chester: Okay Sifl: You can tell if some one is non-cres or super cres. So, uh, we're going to do this song for you now Both: Dankity man, so dankity dank, He go to the park, to hangity-hang, But He's not cresent fresh, His whole lifes a mess. Angiriy dude, with many tatoos, He's living his life, so crudity crude, He's not crescent fresh, His short life's a mess Nicety guy, goes flying a kite, and Niceity guy, she likity likes him They're so crescent fresh, Super Cres at best Hippity dude, likes hackity sack He dont eata the meat, no smokita crack He's so crescent fresh SUPER CREs at best ... Their so crescentfresh. Silf: That make sense? NOTE: Yep. Dogbert: Nope. Silf: go to Cynics Corner this week and get the mp3. Its better with music. > Bulbasaur slammed > him in the ribs with a head butt. Pikachu swung around, teeth bared, all > training forgotten. > NOTE: In the words of Jay, 'Mother fuckers going wolvie beserk style'. Dogbert: Thanks for the stoner flashback. > Shaking, he stood his ground as a laughing Bulbasaur > charged into a flying tackle. Pikachu seized Bulbasaur by the shoulder as > they struggled, biting deep with his miniscule fangs. > Chester: The Vampires! THeir after me again! Sifl: Calm down Chester, it's only a bad lemon. NOTE: Ah! The bad lemons are after me again! Dogbert: Calm down N.O.T.E., its almost over. > "BulbAA!!" Screaming, > Bulbasaur ripped him off, holding his struggling body wrapped tight in his > straining vine whips. Bulbasaur lifted his enemy, and, screaming in rage, > smashed his struggling body against the bole of the rough old tree. > Dogbert: Heh. Slamming him against wood. NOTE: The word straining is very out of place in there. For the skimming reader, it would be a tip off of sex. Dogbert: I know, when it only signal's gratuitious violence. > Triumphant, he dragged and hauled Pikachu into the open, away from the tree > or any other obstruction, away from distractions. > Sifl: Where only the squishs, the sploodges and screams can be heard. > Pikachu spit, coughing out > spatters of blood and saliva as he panted, straining against Bulbasaur's > captivation. > NOTE: Aww, if that line only came later. The author could have added ' couging out blood, semen, and saliva'. Dogbert: No why'd you do that. You ruined the suprise ending. NOTE: The fact it's predicitable? Dogbert: No, the fact that pikachu actualy looses. > Grinning wickedly, Bulbasaur grunted, thrusting downwards; the > force propelled him into the air, as he brutally smashed Pikachu, back > first, into the hard, grassy earth. > Sifl: Did we miss a line? Like one that said how he started flying around? Dogbert: I think we must assume he can jump fairly high again. > Pikachu was very still for a moment. Tail limp and head fallen to one side, > he just lay there. > NOTE: Aww, isn't that nice. He got to come too. > One limp foot twitched several times. One large, damp > tear threaded it's way from his shuttered eye, trickling through the soft > fur of Pikachu's face. > Chester: REvealing the metal skull of the Terminator! Dogbert: Wow, you actualy said something coherent Chester: Yeah, it was all like, WOO! The terminator! Dogbert: Where's a dryer when you need to get rid of a sock? > Spread and prostrate, Pikachu began to keen slightly, > a high, reedy whine tickling from the back of his throat. > NOTE: Call me illeterate, but doesn't keen mean sharp? Dogbert: Not to this guy. Sifl: Heh. Prostate. > Smiling, Bulbasaur stepped forward; he traced the wet path with his eyes, > watching as it slid downwards across Pikachu's face, trembling on Pikachu's > thin lip; gasping softly, Pikachu opened his mouth slightly and sucked it > in. > NOTE: Now, to the oral sex. > Fur soft on his face, Bulbasaur rubbed his muzzle across Pikachu's > cheek, spreading the saline trail over Pikachu's face. > Dogbert: So, Pokemon bleed medical fluids? Sifl: And why is the plant being so nice? He's muzziling the rat he wants to rape. > Reveling in his > power, Bulbasaur laid his head on Pikachu's chest, listening to his > breathing. The fur caressed his chin, rippling across his skin, soft and > silky. Ecstatic, he rubbed his head on Pikachu's stomach, reveling in the > soft, satiny touch, humming gently. > NOTE: Masturbating on pikachu's fur. New hights in kinky. > He smiled as he felt himself tighten, > harden; shifting closer, he began rubbing his hardened body across Pikachu's > silky pelt. > Chester: I didn't know Bulbasaur's were related to weedles. Dogbert: What? Chester: He's attacking with harden. NOTE: That's his penis dude. Chester: No, it's his whole body. Sifl: Now that's gonna hurt. NOTE: I'll say, having a plant stuck up your ass.... > Fluttering eyes shuttered open, slowly, then suddenly snapped > open in shock as Bulbasaur rubbed intimately against him. Spasming, Pikachu > kicked Bulbasaur in the neck, hard. > NOTE:(Pikachu) Stop that! Im Ash's bitch! > "Bahhh!!" Coughing painfully, Bulbasaur reeled back, gargling slightly. > Dogbert: Who's the one that's giving oral here? > Helpless, Pikachu struggled, his legs kicking, toes spread and arms bound > tightly. Breath blowing deeply, Bulbasaur began to moan deeply in the back > of his throat. Growling, he lifted the struggling Pikachu over his head, > holding it firmly harshly, his body braced, legs spread and tense. > Sifl: SO he's skipping the six, and going with the nine? > Suddenly > howling, he smashed Pikachu down before him, crushing his furred chest into > the earth. Hard, he felt his body vibrate, hate, randiness and power > screaming in his head. > NOTE: Now thats a fun rape. The plant not only thrusts, but vibrates. > Tense vines suddenly snapped back. Holding Pikachu, > he maneuvered, unmoving; > Dogbert: Ah, yes, the famous moving without moving technique > Pulling Pikachu towards him, he maneuvered Pikachu > before him; the tip of Pikachu's tail just tickling his nose. > Sifl: The mouse then lost control of his bowels, and showered shit into the plants face. NOTE: I thought Jay was the one that suggested a scat lemon. > Suddenly, > harshly, powerfully, he tightened, pulled and mounted, shoving Pikachu's > tail high over his head,. Hard, he thrust himself forward; Pikachu's eyes > flashed open in panic, and he screamed as he felt Bulbasaur push harshly > against him. > Chester: Kin-Ky NOTE: Everyone cry. We have reached the sex. > Rubbing his hardened erection against Pikachu's silky fur, he > searched, then suddenly felt his hard, firm head find and caress the > straining muscles as he pushed the very tip of his head into the tiny, > clenched opening, feeling the spread of shivering muscles as he wiggled, > positioned, and eyes hard with lust, slowly and agonizingly penetrate, > feeling the straining lips slip over every wrinkle of his hardened body as > he thrust, entering. > All: !!! NOTE: Tell me he did not just rape the rat in the penis hole. > Pikachu screamed as he felt himself spread; muscles > straining, he felt himself pushed open, as the hard, burning head worm it's > way inside him. > Dogbert: NONONONO! Sifl: make it stop, for the love of Led Zepplin, make it stop. Chester: Ow. > Tightening his body in panic, he arched, thrusting back, his > hips bumping sharply against Bulbasaur's thighs and his legs scrabbling > desperately in the dirt. He screamed, eyes crushed closed, as he felt > Bulbasaur fill him; > All: NO! NOTE: Okay, fuck Bobbit lemons, this is just wrong. > horror filled as the hard, raping head dove into his > body, shaft widening the further it slipped inside; sickening muscle > contractions seemed to draw the hard head further in. > Dogbert: Make it stop N.O.T.E., make it stop. NOTE: If I only could... Sifl: Okay, muscle contractions? What, he wants to have it all in his jhonson? Chester: Yeah, wake up and you pee a bulbasaur, and its swish, splash, shwooosh. NOTE: Stop, for the love of BOB stop. > His stretched, > shuddering opening was at it's limit when the broad arch of Bulbasaur's hips > pressed themselves into Pikachu's yellow pelt. > All: NOO! Dogbert: Please, I cant take it anymore. Pee-hole sex.... gods.... > Bulbasaur's thighs began to > caress his rump, thrusting against his straining tail, as Bulbasaur clamped > his forearms around Pikachu's body, arms curling around his hips and claws > scraping as he began to pump rythmically, thrusting harshly against > Pikachu's hips. > NOTE: Critical note, he's saying hips too many times. > Hair sifted down, torn out by Bulbasaur's sharp, scraping > nails as they dug at his side, scratching angry red marks under his fur. > Sifl: Notice the cringing doesnt happen with the bloody and scratching. NOTE: Thats cause the penis isnt involved. > Pikachu felt his own terrified erection scrape in the dirt as he was crushed > under Bulbasaur's humping, straining body. > Dogbert: Tell me he didnt land on his penis. NOTE: I dont think so. > Suddenly lubricated by an > unexpected spray of sperm, Bulbasaur began to slide in and out of Pikachu's > straining anus, bumping over every wrinkle in his foreskin. > Dogbert: He either was fucking the ass all this time, or moved on to the looser orifice. Sifl: Thank god. NOTE: And Bulbasaur aint Jewish apparently. > Pikachu began to > cry out as he was shoved forward, calling at every thrusting hip > contraction, at every time their hanging skin swung and bumped against each > other. > Chester: ball bouncing. Dogbert: Funfun. > Ruthlessly thrusting himself on Pikachu's body, Bulbasaur pulled his > vine whips as hard as he could, pulling Pikachu's entire struggling form > under him. > NOTE: Now it's time for some deep plunging anal action. Dogbert: So we are accepting the pee hole sex? NOTE: No. We are burrying it so deep inside us, we cant remember it. > Pikachu's shuddering tail fell before his nose as his back arched > so far he strained to touch the ground with his desperately scrabbling feet. > Sifl: Again proving that gymnists are hot, and fun fucks. Dogbert: He's a gymnist? Sifl: It's easier to say than half-dead rat rape toy. > Bulbasaur moaned, and, time near, pushed his full, throbbing length to the > hilt into Pikachu, burying his shaft into the hard, clenching hole. > NOTE: And the sphincter clenched so hard, off came the penis. Chester: Slices and dices, and makes julian fries. > Pikachu's screams of agony whipped him, and, moaning desperately, > repetitively, Bulbasaur shifted his humping body, and raised his head to the > sky above, eyes closed and mouth shuddering open, crushing Pikachu into the > earth as he moved. > NOTE: Now lets see the slopy plant come fly. > A scream so high it couldn't be heard stretched Pikachu's > mouth into a rictus of terror. > Dogbert: If no one could hear it, who's to say it happened? NOTE: Don't start with the tree philosophy. Sifl: Isn't a rictus a monkey? > Bulbasaur's cry of orgasm matched his > terrified own as he felt Bulbasaur cum ruthlessly deep inside him; the dirt > under his body suddenly turned to sticky mud, coating his fur as his own > orgasm jerked his body, spraying the ground beneath him with his own seed. > Dogbert: What is this, follow the leader? NOTE: I'm just wondering how the plant can come in the rat, and make the ground muddy. Sifl: He had a realy long dick? > He screamed as he was thrust into the sperm muddied earth by the last, > climaxing throes of Bulbasaur's lustful fury. > NOTE: Seeing as how he came too, one wonders if those screams were of pain, or plesure. Sifl: Let me rape you in the ass and pee-hole, and we'll see what you scream of. > Screaming, Pikachu felt his entire body gather hard, burning energies, and > vent one last, screaming thunder shock into the climaxing body of his > attacker, his rapist, the one being that had stolen his innocence. > Dogbert: Oh yes, you are not evil until you've been analy penetrated. NOTE: Okay, he zaps the plant at the end. Why does that seem stupid? Chester: It's lemony revenge like. Dogbert: Or it proves the pikachu is an idiot, that doesn't know to make some fried bulbasaur as soon as the penis was in him. > The power exploded; Bulbasaur flew off Pikachu's back, slamming to earth > several feet away, knocking the wind from his lungs and the blood from his > erection. > Chester: Sifl, where did the blood come from? Sifl: Well Chester, you realy don't want to know. > Muscles spasming, Bulbasaur yowled in pain, struggling to rise on > shocked, shuddering muscles. Howling, Pikachu lurched, tripping and > scrambling, into the forest. > NOTE: *chuckle* Dogbert: You're laughing? NOTE: Come on, thats funny. The rat zapped him at the end, instead of at the begining. > Bulbasaur looked up, to see the grass sway back into place at Pikachu's > passing. Feeling very stupid, Bulbasaur climbed to his feet. > Sifl: I bet he learned to jack off before he decides to rape someone again. Dogbert: Yeah, apparently jizm was the answer to his anger. > Suddenly > realizing the full impact of what had happened, Bulbasaur froze, mind > turmulous with warring emotions. Spent and aching, Bulbasaur padded into the > forest, mind preoccupied, to find a place to wash. > NOTE:(Bulbasaur) God, I hope this penis blood doesn't stain. Dogbert: Mention that penis sex agian, and I will kill you. > Inevitably, Pikachu slowed his mindless, headlong dash; exhausted, he > couldn't keep up his frenzied pace, and slowed, limping, before eventually > he stopped, panting, to sit down and die. > All: *clapping, cheering* Note: ~\o Ding, dong, the rat is dead, the stupid rat, the electric rat. o/~. > At least, that was his intention; > All: Awwww. > setting down to rest, he suddenly flies upwards, screaming in pain as his > bleeding anus explodes in fiery agony. > NOTE: *lol* Okay, that is one sigworthy line. Sifl: Not if you have hemoroids. > Crying miserably, he arches his back, > screaming in pain, shame and horror. Shivering, hurt and alone, Pikachu > begins crying like a child, bawling his pain and terror out into the forest > with a miserable "Piiikaaaa-PIIII KAAAHH pIII, chuu chuUUHH!!" > NOTE: I'm begining to think that the people that read this, don't get off on the rape scene, they get off on the lingering pain. > Ash. He had to get to Ash. Ash would help him- Pikachu shuddered in horror > as he felt the sickening strings of stinking mud slid through the fine hairs > of his pelt, dripping coldly across his flesh, down his chest and between > his thighs to ooze down his small, short legs. Pikachu hugged himself > miserably. How could he let Ash see him like this? > Dogbert: Oh yes, he would be the gossip of all those clean sewer rats. > Bruised, stained and > stinking of sex, he couldn't let his friend see him, know what happened, > what had happened to him. Calling out his pain and agony into the vaulting > expanse of the huge, uncaring forest, Pikachu let his shocked, bruised, > raped and exhausted body slowly sag to earth. Moaning, he rubbed his face > in the soft grass, letting it wipe away the pain of his molestation; the > blades just rubbed the slimy splatters into his skin. > Sifl: This would have been a whole hella lot funnier if he was PikaBlu. Dogbert: That was a horrid current event joke. Sifl: Aww. Why? Dogbert: It was news 2 years ago. It's not that current. > Shuddering in shame > and loathing, He rubbed desperately at his fur, his little fingers combing > through his sticky coat. > NOTE: He can always go for the fifties greaser look. > Panicking, Pikachu opened his mouth and tried to > lick his coat clean. > Dogbert: Oh god, now we get oral. > Crying out in misery, Pikachu gagged at the tangy, > salty, silty flavors coating his tongue. > Sifl: Can you say duh? > "Pika-PIII !!" Okay. Just think. Pikachu breathed deeply, slow, calming. > Not thinking about his fur, the smell or the horr- the thing that just > happened. > Dogbert: Woohoo! The thesaurus has been broken! > Determinantly ignored the sliding liquid. Determinantly ignored > the taste of sex and dirt on his tongue. Determinantly ignored the memory of > Bulbasaur's hot, hard- breaking down, Pikachu began to cry, hot tears > sliding down his cheeks. > Dogbert: And it broke good. NOTE: It's almost like he's getting hot for Bulba's plant meat. > Weeping quietly, Pikachu followed the faint, > ambient sound of flowing water. > Chester: Yeah, it's a techno waterfall, all dun dun duhnndundun, ba dun. > The air was thick with humidity, fluid with the gentle sound of water on > polished stone. The sun warmed rocks shone with dampness, luminescent with > the sheen of water over the imbeded quartz crumbs and fragments. Algae > lapped quietly at the waterline, small stringy fingers grappling the eroded > stones. > Sifl: From bloody rape, to happy water. How cres. > The water appeared a multitude of flashing lights under the sun's > rays, flinging flashing yellow and filtered green across the lapping waves. > The thin breeze settled across the stream banks, stirring across the stones > and teasing Pikachu's wet, sticky fur, syphoning away the scent of heat on > the waving zephirs. Pikachu stared into the water's shifting surface, ears > crained high and feet gripping tensely to the damp, slippery surface. The > breeze teased across his back, his sides, flipping and furrowing his fur > into gentle, caressing waves. > Dogbert: Not to mention sticky. NOTE: Is it just me, or is it realy happy all of a sudden? Sifl: Masturbation scene? NOTE: or a setup. > Shifting, leaning down, Pikachu extended his > arm and dipped his little fist into the water. It was warm, running over his > hand gently. > Dogbert: Or it's a waterports scene. > Pulling out, Pikachu let himself down, digging his fingers into > the slick, weathered rock. > Sifl: Strong ass rat. > Toes squelching gently in the edge of the > streambed, Pikachu stepped out into the shallow edge, feeling the water tug > gently at his fur. > Chester: Water sex, all warm and stuff. > The water was warm, tepid and soft on his skin, seeping > through the fur on his legs as he stood, adjusting to the balmy temperature. > Note: And washing out his ass. > Sloshing, Pikachu waded further out into the stream, feeling the waves lap > further and further up his fur. Shoulder deep, Pikachu turned away from the > oncoming current, from the deep blue center of the stream, and let his eyes > slide closed, breathing deeply. > Dobert: How borring. He drowns himself. The end. NOTE: I'd say wait. > The water teased at his fur, loosening the > gummy mud stuck spikes. > Sifl: Electric punk rat, we hardly know ye. > Mud rose from his body, sifting into silt and away. > His fur slowly freed, raising like a glowing halo around his body, small > bubbles shining. > NOTE:(Anouncer) Yes folks, the new beverage from Pepsico, Carbinated Bulbasaur come. It's only a drive and an assrape away from you're local distributer. > Humming, he let his head slide under water, until only his > quivering nostrils broke the surface. > Dogbert: Please, no nasal sex. > Time slowed to a humming crawl, > heartbeat thrumming in his ears as he hung in meditative stilness in the > liquid matrix. > Sifl: Shoulda went with the blue pill rat-boy. > Pikachu felt his mind still; nearly sleeping, he let the > water take away the pain of Bulbasaur's violation- > NOTE: and the bloody scat. > Pikachu's eyes opened in shock as he felt himself grasped from below. > Dogbert: I wonder. Fish or plant? NOTE: For the sake of a bad lemon, Im going with plant. > His > head was ripped underwater, shocking cold water pushing it's way down his > nose. > Sifl: Well, if Chester was right, it is Nasal sex. Sorry Dog. Dogbert: Damnit. Sifl: I know. It's so uncress. > Bubbles thrust out of his mouth as he screamed, choking in terror. > NOTE: More Bulba come > He > felt his body gripped by the current- no, not the current, by the rough vine > winding around his body like an Ekan's coils. > Sifl: I thought the plant was sad for the rape. NOTE: He was. He didnt get to come twice. > Struggling, flailing, Pikachu > felt his mind dull, his body screaming for air. Suddenly, his sopping head > was thrust upwards, into air and light. Gasping, heaving, Pikachu coughed, > vomiting water out of his burning lungs, as he hung half out of the water. > Dogbert: Great, a vomit fetish lemon too. > "Pika-aaahh..." Voice hoarse, Pikachu opened his eyes, staring up into the > red eyes of Bulbasaur. Held helpless in the water, Pikachu hung limply in > Bulbasaur's caressing grip. > Chester: Nice plant? Dogbert: Maybe the psycho decided rapping was bad. > Shrinking in fear, Pikachu tried to lean away, > but he was held fast in Bulbasaur's viny coils. > NOTE: Guess not. > Eyes bright, Bulbasaur > leaned forward. His hard, muscular chest rubbed against Pikachu's fur, > leaning onto Pikachu's body. Pikachu felt his body vibrate from Bulbasaur's > presence, from the feel of flesh against his fur. > NOTE: i tell you, he's hot for the plant. > Crying, Pikachu struggled > in Bulbasaur's grip. > NOTE: Just in a realy scared as shit way. > Ruthless, Pitiless, Bulbasaur lowered his vines. The > water closed over Pikachu's head, leaking into his ears, > Dogbert: Oh no, not the ears! > filling his mouth > and throat as Bulbasaur held him down. Limbs flailing, Pikachu clawed at > Bulbasaur's chest, small fingers running over Bulbasaur's skin. Bulbasaur > heaved, pulling Pikachu up as he sobbed. Pikachu cried in Bulbasaur's grip, > stilling, unresisting. Holding him close, Bulbasaur stared unblinking into > Pikachu's eyes. > Sifl:(Pikachu) Damnit Bulbasaur, this isn't the time for a starring contest. Just take my ass, leave my pee-hole alone, and get on with it. > Speaking slowly and evenly, Bulbasaur began to talk, > Pikachu's eyes widening in misery at the voice droning on. > NOTE: Voice over by Ben Stein? > "I know why you're here. > Dogbert:(Bulba) But I dont have any funky skunky at this time. > I know what you need to do. For Ash. Not to let > Ash see you like that. Not to let Ash see what happened to you, what you > have become. > Sifl: His bitch? > But contemplate this. When you return to your life, clean and > purified, what are you going to tell Ash? > NOTE: The big green mother fucker ass raped me, under an apple tree. Get out the Herbicide. > What are you ging to say? Are you > going to tell him? Are you going to tell him what happened? That I had you? > Dogbert: For the sake of the pervert pokemon trainer, sure. We all need to get off. > > That you were the bitch under me, squirming under me, crying under my body? > NOTE: Hell, tell the ASPCA. Pee-Hole sex is abuse. Dogbert: Shut up. > What will Ash think of you then; when he finds out what you are, what you > are to me? > Chester: Bulbachu babies! > My whore. My little whore-" > Sifl: Lines from 'Pretty Woman: The musical'? > Leaning in close, Bulbasaur breathes > his words into Pikachu's shuddering ear. "Think of this. Only think of this: > Who will be Ash's new favorite? It might not be me, but it will change..." > Dogbert: Oh yes, when you get raped you can never be a tv star. Or a plush toy. > "Go ahead and return. But remember; while you stand there yellow and clean, > remember: I took you. My sperm still swims inside of you, wiggling deep > inside. > Chester: BulbaChu's babies! NOTE: That was so not a nice image. > But by all means, go. Tell Ash. Go ahead. Tell him. I am sure he > will understand. I'm sure nothing will change. When he finds out what > happened. > Sifl: Except the plant's gonna get the hell beat outta him. > Who was crying under who. Struggling under who. Taking the dick. > His favorite Pokemon. > NOTE: like Pikachu isnt a sex toy inother lemons. > What will you tell him? What will you tell.... " > Suddenly pulling away, unwinding his vines, Bulbasaur let the weeping, > crying Pikachu free, standing hip deep in the stream. Wailing, Pikachu fled, > struggling away through the water, feet slipping over the smooth, round > rocks, burning under the horrible, echoing sound of Bulbasaur's triumphant, > echoing laughter ripping through the trees... > Dogbert: Rape the body, rape the mind. I think he's done. NOTE: One more pee-hole sex scene? Dogbert: I will get you back for this NOTE. > "Pikachu's been gone a long time." Ash said, scanning the forest edge in > worry. He fidgeted with his tea, finger tracing the rim of the cup with a > subconscious, repetitive motion, mind churning. > Sifl: What the fuck? Ash is british? Tea swiller. > Brock looked up at his > worried tone, nursing his coffee. > Sifl: Good, at least he's ammerican. > He must admit he had been thinking the > same thing. Pulling himself to his feet, he wandered to Ash's side, placing > a concilidatory handon Ash's slumped shoulder. > NOTE: Human rape. Good top off to a bad lemon. > "Ash, he probably found somewhere confortable to curl up in. > NOTE: Or someone to curl up in him. > Pikachu is > powerful enough to take care of himself-" > All:*heh* > Brock halts as Ash whips around, > eyes blazing in panic. "But- but Pikachu was nearly wiped out by his last > fight! He couldn't defend himself from anything! What if something happened > to him-" Panicking, Ash sprang to his feet. Turning away from Brock, he > faced the forest where Pikachu had dissapeared, and screamed "PIKACHUU!!" > into the blank vegitation. > Dogbert: Perhaps teh two idiots will run into each other screaming like morons. > Brock held Ash as he shook, looking at the forest > in dismay. > "Pika PIII!!" Pikachu charged through the grass. Unheeding of the harsh > cuts crisscrossing his fur, he sprinted towards Ash, throwing himself into > his arms. > NOTE: Aww, how sweet. Ho and pimp reunited. > He wriggled in Ash's arms, burying his head in the soft folds of > Ash's shirt, breathing in his scent and weeping with relief. Ash wrapped his > arms around Pikachu's body, crushing his head in Pikachu's fur. > Sifl: Damn, that come gets hard fast. And it's able to crush a skull... > The two held > each other for a long moment, Brock and Misty looking on. > Dogbert: Perverts. > The day wound on, > the sun dipped into twilight, as the team set camp, lit a fire, and made > ready for the night. > Sifl: And the idiot didn't notice the bleeding anus? > As Ash lay in bed, one hand caressing Pikachu's fur, he turned suddenly, > looking down, and ran a gentle hand over Pikachu's head. > NOTE: Freak just cant keep the sex crazed fuckers off of him. Sifl: I gotta get me a pikachu, just to fuck. > "I was worried > about you, Pikachu. I guess I should have trusted you. You know how to take > care of yourself. That's why I chose you, Pikachu. Nothing can touch you. > You're so perfect." > Chester: And he had no one else to choose. Cause he's all sleeping and then not awake in time. > Turning, Ash stared down at Pikachu. The night was > thick, concealed Pikachu's expression in the gloom. "Goodnight Pikachu. > Sleep well. I hope you have good dreams... My perfect Pokemon..." slowly, > Ash fell asleep. Pikachu lay curled under the weight of Ash's soft, sleeping > hand. > Sifl: That slowly suffucated him. > His eyes were very big, shining in the darkness. He bit down on his > lip to crush the sobs wracking his body, hugging himself and wrapping his > tail tight. Cheeks wet with tears of misery, Pikachu whispered "Pikapii..." > into the uncaring darkness. > Dogbert: THe darkness cares for me. > Ash tightened his fingers, caressing Pikachu's > coat tenderly. Crying, Pikachu nuzzling his head under Ash's hand. Closing > his eyes, he slowly slipped off to sleep. > NOTE: Where the sandman decided to rape him. > The night was black and silent. Dogbert: Instead of light and loud. > Nobody was awake to hear the scraping > sounds of claw on metal. Bulbasaur hummed to himself blissfully as he popped > open his pokeball. > NOTE: Comming in the darkness, in the middle of camp. > As he felt the deep red light caress over his flesh, he > couldn't help smiling. The memory of the day sent a shudder through his > body. And that wouldn't be all. > Sifl: I should say not. Having a pikachu bitch is something that becomes a daily event. > As the satiny darkness of the pokeball > engulfed him, he smiled all the wider. That wouldn't be all. Not by a long > shot... > Chester: Rock the sure shot then, with the beastie boys. > The end > all: FUCK YES!! > more to come... > ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ All: Fuck NO!!! > Writing and working don't mix. > Dogbert: Writing and you don't mix. > Like I said, this is my first submitted lemon. It is concequently also my > first Pokemon lemon. Mostly I like to write twisted little Oddworld > lemons/fanfics for fun and therapy. > NOTE: No... not Abe... no.... *exit theater*