~~~~~~~~~~ MST: EVIL! ~~~~~~~~~~ The Time: Hell if I know... The Place: Reef's Secret Underwater Lair *Currently in Earth's orbit* The Plot: Read and find out! Cast: (whoo boy) Real People: Reef Watertype Lunar Knight X Sara Jaye SSL's Anthro Espeon Tenchi Muyo: Ryoko Ryo-Ohki DBZ Folks: Vegeta Toonami: TOM Duckman: Duckman Cornfed Zero Wing: CATS Original Characters: Ixies Efluie Bleep(s) Disclaimer: Since I'm not making any money off this, it'll be too hard for you to sue me, and I'm protected under the parody clause! (I think) ~~~~~~~~~ BEGIN MST ~~~~~~~~~ *A typical day on the SUL, almost everybody is in the lounge, sitting back and practicing their riffing skills on CATS's dialog, while TOM plays solitaire and the omnipresent plot-hole continues to spin in its mysterious way... however... there are two absent people... Reef... and Efuie. Camerapan! Efluie is marching down the main hallway of the SUL, the Mission Impossible theme is playing in the background, and oooooh boy, does she look ready to kill!* Cheat on me... will he... well... well... I'LL MAKE HIM PAAAAAAAAAAAAY! *She barges in on Reef and SSL's Anthro Espeon, who are in the middle of having a lovely homemade breakfast, she stands silohetted in the doorway, her eyes glowing* Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeef... *Reef and the Espeon look up at Efluie with sweatdrops* Er, hi Efluie? Is this your ex-girlfriend? ____EX____-GIRLFRIEND!?! .... uhoh *Back in the lounge, an explosion is heard, followed by a big gust of wind from the door to the hallway and a big cloud of smoke, Ixies panics and runs out of the room* What do you think that was about? Sex. Damnit! There go all my cards! I desire the fact that ventilation does not impair the boat Usted y yo ambos. Cats, usually ventilation sinks ships. ¡Él significó el ataque de Efluie, no un agujero en un barco! It's amazing how those two seem to understand each other. They don't? *Ixies runs back in the room with a net* Okay everybody! Get into the gym! Efluie, Reef, and I need some privacy! Bah, if you say so. All of us? This is going to get crowded real fast... The gym? Does that mean we're actually going to get some plot development? The story has been pretty scrawney lately. Oh just shut up and move! *she rushes into the hallway towards Reef's room, everyone else heads for the SUL's gym* Wow, I didn't even know this place had a gym, if I did I would have spent some time in here and buffed up, y'know? Then you chicks would really be able to dig me! *Sara looks around* I'm not even human, don't look at me. *sigh...* As the only girl here I feel obliged to be insulted by that. *CLOBBER!* *Duckman falls unconsious, all cheer* So where's the TV? No me pregunte... Permit I. *He pulls his robe apart* AHHHHHHHHH!!! EWWWWWWWWW!!! FlASHER!!! *Cats reveals a TV set imbedded in his stomach. Hey, how long have you had that? I don't remember you having that back when we dated... especially during... Inebriated you were. That's enough of that, Yoda, just start the damn fiction... Heh... so I was... It pulls the beam sword to me and pulls out, makes you kill. ¿Qué el infierno usted justo dijo? *CATS sighs and turns on the TV in his tummy* ~~~~~ Pokéball: Evil - Calling Dr. Tonsei - ~~~~~ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ~~~~~ -----Dr. Tonsei’s Lab (Who : Cares) ~~~~~ Wow, even the guy who handles the time can't stand Dr. Tonsei. ~~~~~ -Dr. Tonsei is sitting at a desk, Mrs. X is on a lab table behind him. Dr. Tonsei: Mwahahahahaha! My final creation is almost complete! But first...... my Jell-o..... ~~~~~ I don't know how he can eat surrounded by all his creations. ~~~~~ Mrs. X: Ugggghhhhnnnn....... ~~~~~ Apparently neither does Mrs. X ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: Yes, I know they hurt you my dear, ~~~~~ *Mrs. X* I can't believe that snorlax broke up with me... ~~~~~ but don’t worry, you’ll be better very soon.... ~~~~~ I wouldn't know about that, it is a well-known fact that Snorlax usually end courtship rituals by sitting on their mate. Eeeewwwwwwwwww... ~~~~~ Mrs. X: Uggggghhhhnnnnnnnn...... Dr. Tonsei: Mmm.... never a bad time for the pudding...... ~~~~~ YEUGH!!! *Duckman wakes up, looks at the TV and passes out again That's not pudding you blind freak! That's her brain!!! ~~~~~ -Mrs. X moans some more and coughs up some blood. ~~~~~ *Dr. Tonsei* Mmmm... special sauce... ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: Is there something wrong my dear? Mrs. X: ...{Passed out} Dr. Tonsei: Not again! What is wrong with you? ~~~~~ *Mrs. X* You're eating out of my damn skull!!! ~~~~~ -Dr. Tonsei glances at the security monitor behind Mrs. X and notices that he has company... ~~~~~ *Dr. Tonsei* Oooh! Guests! I can invite them in for pudding and tea! Yea, that would kill 'em all right. ~~~~~ -----Outside - Leon, Misty, Ash, Chris, Claire, Jill, Ark, and Giovanni ~~~~~ *singing* And a partr-i-ge in a pear tree! ~~~~~ are walking off of Tobias’s shuttle, strapped with weaponry. Tobias: Well, here we are... everyone ready? ~~~~~ Everyone except the partrige. ~~~~~ Ash: Ready as we’ll ever be. ~~~~~ In that case, nobody including the partrige. ~~~~~ -Dr. Tonsei slowly walks out of his hideout. ~~~~~ *Dr. Tonsei, singing* Yea we do the arthritic shuffel, the arthritic shuffel, the arthritic shuffel... ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: Well, my friends, I am not ready. My masterpiece will be ready for you soon, ~~~~~ I don't know if this comes as a surprise or not old man, but Leonardo DiVinci you ain't. ~~~~~ so if you could just wait for a few... Misty: You think we’re going to just let you have time to send a monster after us!? ~~~~~ Jesús Cristo... Considering your track record... yes ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: By all means no... that’s why I’ve prepared some entertainment. Let’s start with this! ~~~~~ LET'S NOT AND SAY WE DID!!! Shouting, with me where is not good... You're the TV, we'll shout at you all we want. ~~~~~ XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Monster Info: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Name: Geostalker Type: Sandslash / Hunter Hybrid Height: 7 Feet 10 Inches Weight: 300 lbs. ~~~~~ That's pretty light for 7 feet 10 inches... It must be hollow! ~~~~~ A large combination of the ground type pokémon Sandslash and the reptilian monster Hunter. Despite its weight, ~~~~~ Despite? Um... it weighs about the same as my refrigerator... Okay, so sue me! Lunar Knight X is ordered to pay the plaintiffs the amount of $30,000 dollars in cash, each! O_o;; Where the hell did he come from!?! *Fingering his money* I'm not complaining. ~~~~~ it is very agile. Its deadly claws can cut a person’s head off in a single swipe. On top of that, it’s thick scales render it virtually bulletproof. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Chris: What is that!? Tobias: Dead. ~~~~~ I would assume so, since it's a zombie monster. Oh shut the fuck up... ~~~~~ -Tobias fires a rocket launcher at it, but the monster easily dodges and makes a run for Claire. Claire tries to run, but it is too speedy for her and it knocks her over. ~~~~~ *Duckman wakes up in time to... *Sandstalker* PUSSY!!! *Everyone clobbers Duckman at once and he falls unconsious again ~~~~~ Misty: Lets hope that since it looks like a Sandslash, it has the same weaknesses, Staryu go! ~~~~~ *sigh* Misty, has that ever worked before? ~~~~~ - Misty throws the pokéball, and Staryu is released and attacks the monster with a watergun attack. It doesn’t seem to harm it, but it is diverted from Claire. Geostaler ~~~~~ Geowhat? It was a typo!! A typo!!! Actually, I think "Geostaller" is a better name for it, anyway. ~~~~~ quickly turns and leaps at Staryu, clawing it into several pieces. Misty: Staryu!! Return! ~~~~~ Uh.... yeaaaaaa... Actually, Staryu can recover from being dismembered, although actually Misty should now have several of them. ¿Estropee nuestra diversión, por qué no usted? ~~~~~ -----Tobias‘s Transport, Roof -Jessie and James are sitting on the roof, James has binoculars, and both of them have rifles. ~~~~~ That's a disaster waiting to happen if I've ever seen one. ~~~~~ Jessie: What’s happening? ~~~~~ WHAT HAPPEN?? *CATS twitches* ~~~~~ James: Well, it looks like some big green sandslash is attacking them. ~~~~~ SOMEBODY SET UP US THE GREEN SANDSLASH! ~~~~~ Jessie: You think this would be a good time for us to help? ~~~~~ WE GET IDEA! MAIN HELP TURN ON! ~~~~~ James: I guess so, but do you know how to work these things? ~~~~~ ALL YOUR INCOMPETANCE ARE BELONG TO US! ~~~~~ Both: ...They’re doomed. ~~~~~ THEY HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME! *CATS has a seizure and falls over, but the TV stays on* Awwwww.... ~~~~~ -----The Battle with Geostalker ~~~~~ Stalking Claire since 1987! ~~~~~ Chris: Damnit, the bullets aren’t damaging it! We’ve gotta hit it with the rocket launcher! ~~~~~ Somehow I think bludgeoning a big green rock monster with a long metal tube won't hurt it much. ~~~~~ Tobias: No need, all of the distractions on the monster gave me enough time to set it up. ~~~~~ It's Multi-dick Man to the rescue! Multi-dick Man ho! ~~~~~ Ash: Set what up? ~~~~~ Isn't it obvious? *snicker* ~~~~~ Tobias: Everyone back off a bit, and be sure to stay away from me! ~~~~~ Wow, is it just me or is this surprisingly easy? Oh shut up... just shut up... ~~~~~ - Everyone ceases fire and tries to get back. ~~~~~ *Everyone* GANGWAY!!! ~~~~~ With Tobias the only one firing at it, the monster turns it’s attention to him. ~~~~~ *monster* Wow... that's a lot of dicks... ~~~~~ Tobias starts jogging backwards, ~~~~~ *monster* Swaying... dicks... hypnotizing... ~~~~~ keeping a close eye on the monster. ~~~~~ One from each of his own one-eyed monsters. ~~~~~ When Geostalker is about 15 feet away, ~~~~~ Close enough to give Multi-dick Man a quick blowjob! ~~~~~ Tobias turns and hits the ground as an explosion sends the monster sailing. ~~~~~ BUKKAKE! EWWWWWWWWWWWW! ~~~~~ Giovanni: A... a landmine!? ~~~~~ *Tobias* If you want to call it that, feel free. ~~~~~ Tobias: No, I didn’t have room for that, ~~~~~ *Tobias* In my pants ~~~~~ so I just used a cluster of remote mines. Not as strong, but it got the job done. ~~~~~ *TV announcer* A Cluster Of Remote Mine condoms, not as strong, but it gets the job done! ~~~~~ Claire: Who cares, it’s dead, now let’s get on with it! ~~~~~ *All get on with it* ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: Very well, let’s move along.... ~~~~~ *Dr. Tonsei* Move along... let's move along folks, nothing to see here... move along... ~~~~~ let’s see how you handle this! ~~~~~ Let's not. ~~~~~ - A new monster walks out of the lab. ~~~~~ Nobody listens anymore... ~~~~~ XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Monster Info: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Name: Lickertongue Type: Licker / Lickitung Hybrid Height: 2 Feet Weight: 400 lbs. No Comment XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX ~~~~~ *All sweatdrop* ~~~~~ Chris: I.... uh....? Claire: Isn’t it a bit...... small? ~~~~~ *Tobias* It is NOT! ... oh, you were talking about the monster... ~~~~~ Tobias: And um.... fat? Misty: OH MY GOD THAT IS CUTE! ~~~~~ *All facefault* ~~~~~ Ash: Oh god.... Ark: Cute? - Misty runs up to the monster and starts hugging it. ~~~~~ I thought Misty only liked watertypes like that. It is a watertype! The tongue! The saliva! ... *Everyone takes a few minutes to purge that mental image from their brain* ~~~~~ Ash: Misty, what the hell are you doing!? Misty: Oh, look at it, it’s so small and cuddly, how could it hurt us? ~~~~~ It's like she wants to make love to it. ~~~~~ - Suddenly Misty’s ankle is grabbed by a tentacle. ~~~~~ Heh, speak of the devil. *Tobias* I SWEAR that isn't me! ~~~~~ Misty: What!? Giovanni: What!? It’s changing!? -The monster morphs into a large gray blob with lots of tentacles flying about. ~~~~~ Whoah! It's Glemph! Who? Glemph! From Ghastly's online comic! TOM, Glemph is green. Glemph is gray when the comic's in black and white! No arguing! *Sigh* ~~~~~ XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Monster Info: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Name: Repetition Type: Failed Ditto Experiment Height: ? Weight: ? ~~~~~ Say, how come we don't get a height and weight? Ryoko, Repetition is sensitive, be polite! ~~~~~ A ditto who failed an experiment with the zombie virus. ~~~~~ *Teacher* Repetition, you fail! *Repetition* Awww... ~~~~~ He can change his shape, but can’t keep it for long, and when he’s not transformed, he’s a large mass with flailing tentacles. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Tobias: Great, from monsters and the living dead to a cheap hentai flick.... -Everyone glares at Tobias ~~~~~ *And everyone in the gym clobbers Duckman pre-emptively before he can wake up and say anything* ~~~~~ Tobias: What? -They shake their heads and start shooting the monster. ~~~~~ Y Misty también. Yay! ~~~~~ Misty: Damnit, someone save me! ~~~~~ Booo! ~~~~~ Ash: It’s your own damn fault! ~~~~~ Yay! ~~~~~ Giovanni: How are we supposed to kill that!? The bullet’s don’t work! ~~~~~ Awww... ~~~~~ Chris: And if we use explosives, we’ll hit Misty. ~~~~~ And what's wrong with that? ~~~~~ Tobias: Well, don’t they usually cut off the monster’s... -Glares again. Tobias: WHAT!? ~~~~~ Well, it makes sense that Mutli-dick Man would be a pervert. No, Sara, not just a pervert. A full blown hentai! Jeeze, how could I have been so blind!? Of course! Thank you Ryoko! *nods and crosses her arms, closing her eyes* Don't mention it. What the hell just happened in here? ~~~~~ Ark: Maybe if we could get it to transform? ~~~~~ Transformers! More than meets the eye! Wrong crossover, TOM. ~~~~~ Tobias: No, wait! I have an idea! I’ll just give it some of the virus’s antidote. ~~~~~ *Tobias* Now where did I put it...? ~~~~~ Chris: There’s an antidote! ~~~~~ *Tobias* Christ, a rocket launcher isn't an antidote, and you don't have to shout. ~~~~~ Claire: Why doesn’t Umbrella use that to clean up their messes instead of big things that go boom!? ~~~~~ Easy. Things that go boom are more fun! ~~~~~ Tobias: Hey, it’s still experimental, and has some side effects, who knows what it’ll do? Just be glad that I come prepared. ~~~~~ With a name like "Multi-dick Man" you'd better go places prepared, buster. *groan* ~~~~~ -Tobias aims a tranquilizer gun (filled with the cure rather than tranq) at the monster and fires. After a moment, the monster starts shrinking and the appendages start to recede into the body. ~~~~~ Oh my god! It's anti-viagra! I guess Multi-dick Man would have carry that in case of emergencies... ~~~~~ Ash: Misty, quick, come over here! ~~~~~ *Ash* I've got something for you! heh heh heh. ~~~~~ - As Misty runs toward Ash, the monster starts vibrating and shape shifting violently. ~~~~~ Wow, that thing's shaking more than my washing machine! ~~~~~ Repetition: Diii~moooo~grimmm~hissss~slowpooookk~ghastllll~vullllpiii... Ash: Man, those are some side effects... Tobias: Told you... Misty: Hey, what’s it changing to now...? Jill: Good god! Tobias: That’s disgusting! Chris: Kill it! Repetition: Remember! Dial down the center with 1-800-CALL-ATT, free for you and cheap for them! - Carro... er... Repetition starts vibrating madly, and then simply explodes. ~~~~~ *everybody sits in stunned silence* That's easily the most disturbing thing we've seen yet. What kind of a monster are you LK!?! If only we could do that to the real Carrot Top. *sigh* We can only dream. ~~~~~ Jill: What kind of madman are you!? Dr. Tonsei: Even I never expected that to happen... ~~~~~ SuuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUuuuuuuuuuuure. ~~~~~ Well, I seem to be left with one monster, now you will face my ultimate...! -While Tonsei is ranting, Mrs. X walks out of the lab toward the group. ~~~~~ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: Huh? You can’t go out there, you’re not fully recovered! ~~~~~ She's ugly and retarded. A horrifying combination. They should just kill her now. ~~~~~ Leon: That one again!? Tobias: Looks like it’s not in top shape, an easy win. ~~~~~ Cripes, I can't belive he's not flipping out. This is Mrs. X we're talking about!!! Maybe Tobias has seen worse things? *Everyone exchanges very very worried glances* ~~~~~ -Tobias walks back and retrieves the Rocket Launcher from earlier. He fires at the monstrosity and Mrs. X is hit and thrown into the outside wall of the lab. ~~~~~ By the New York Mets pitcher living inside the rocket launcher. ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: No... I did my best to keep her healthy since her last encounter, but now.... You’ll pay for that! ~~~~~ That must have been an expensive wall! ~~~~~ My ultimate creation! XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Monster Info: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Name: Nightmare Type: Fire / Ghost Height: 8 Feet Weight: ? ~~~~~ Another sensitive one, eh? Tonsei must be a lousy father to be making all these self-consious creatures. That or I just don't know how much these things weigh? Phffsh, sure. ~~~~~ A man-made Rapidash evolution that crosses it into a ghost type. XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Ash: Huh? That looks more like a real pokémon than the other monsters. ~~~~~ *Sara nudges LK* A ghost type huh? Trying to go for the zombie-rapidash in normal pokemon terms? Yea, yea I was! Thanks Sara! Well you sucked at it. ......... -_- *CATS groans and finally wakes up from his seizure... ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: I’ve been experimenting on this aside from the Umbrella viruses. I’ve taken the genetic information used to create Mewtwo, and altered the experiment to allow me to evolve pokemon to my choosing. This was just the first experiment, a ghost type in the Rapidash line; but imagine the possibilities, a steel type Muk? A psychic type Golem? A Flying type Dugrio? A water type Vaporeon!? Ash: But... Vaporeons are water types. Dr. Tonsei: Pheh, so they are, but you get the point of my genius, just the same, don’t you? Now, Nightmare, show them your perfection. ~~~~~ This is reminding me of something.... Perhaps Dr. Gero creating Cell? Cell did rant on and on about being perfect. ¡Augh! ¡No mencione ese nombre! ¡Habría podido derrotar Cell, yo realmente podría tener! Somebody better have Gohan's number, or we're going to be here for a long long time. *Vegeta sighs* That reminds me. Didn't you guys say before that your TVs usually get destroyed? O_o;;;;;;; *CATS quickly pretends to have another seizure and falls back down* ~~~~~ Ash: It’s no good, none of these weapons will hurt a ghost type! Misty: Ash, it’s a fire type too! Use Lapras! Ash: Good idea! -Ash calls out Lapras. ~~~~~ *Ash* I'm calling you out, Lapras! *Lapras* Oh yea!?! You and what army!?! *TV Announcer* And thus began the brutal gang war between the water-types and the stupid-types. ~~~~~ Ash: Lapras! Use every water attack you have on that thing! ~~~~~ EVERY attack? Watch Lapras piss on it. Ew. That's just ew. ~~~~~ -Lapras unleashes every attack it can muster against Nightmare. It is weakened, but not defeated. ~~~~~ That was anticlimatic. ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: Pheh, that’s nothing for Nightmare, it’ll recover quickly. Huh? Who’s there!? - From the bushes, two figures walk out. ~~~~~ Yes... the drama is incredible... I feel us building towards another anti-climax and here... it... comes.... ~~~~~ John: Hey boss! Funny meeting you here! ~~~~~ Hey! It's those two nuts again! I missed them! ~~~~~ Giovanni: Of all the places...... Wayne: H...hey, what’s that thing!? (Points to Nightmare) ~~~~~ *John* I'd wager it's a nightmare. *Wayne* No shit? ~~~~~ -Wayne gets a little shocked and drops the barrel he was carrying and it rolls toward Nightmare. Wayne: No! That’s our root beer! Giovanni: Did... you... say.....? Shit! Everyone get down! John: Huh? -Everyone confusedly drops to the ground, except for John and Wayne, because they’re idiots. ~~~~ Duh. ~~~~ When the barrel hits nightmare, it bursts open and explodes. Everyone seems fine afterward, except for John and Wayne, who were last seen flying into the air saying something about blasting off again. And of course James who looked directly into the explosion with the binoculars. ~~~~~ *James* AUGH! MY EYES! THE GOGGLES! THEY DO NOTHING! ~~~~~ Nightmare was still alive, but too severely damaged to continue fighting. Chris: What the hell was that!? ~~~~~ A convenient plot device. ~~~~~ Giovanni: I should have known those fools were the ones who screwed with the helicopter fuel... ~~~~~ *Giovanni* I mean, really, they're the only ones who wear that type of condom! ... What? Duckman's out of it, someone has to make the dirty jokes. ~~~~~ Tobias: Sounds like a wonderful story, ~~~~~ No it doesn't. ~~~~~ but can we get the doc now? Dr. Tonsei: You’ll never take me back to those bastards at Umbrella! Tobias: Take you back? No, I have express orders to kill you and all of your freaks, and then torch your lab. ~~~~~ So why the hell did you leave Nightmare alive you idiot? ~~~~~ Dr. Tonsei: You.... can’t... ~~~~~ Sure he can! ~~~~~ Tobias: Business is business..... Dr. Tonsei: I’ll never let you win, you young fool. ~~~~~ So what does that make Dr. Tonsei? An old smart man? More like an old wise ass. You're all giving him too much credit. It just makes Tonsei an old idiot. ~~~~~ -Dr. Tonsei quickly rushes back into his lab. Tobias: Come on, let’s go. ~~~~~ ¿Está hablando de "va," dónde el cuarto de baño? ~~~~~ Ash: Hey, um.... Giovanni: What now? Ash: It’s... moving again. ~~~~~ *Giovanni* Ash, how many times have I had to tell you that it is a very natural and magical thing that happens when "it" moves? ~~~~~ -Mrs. X, looking more horribly mutilated than before, slowly gets to one knee. ~~~~~ *Ash* Even when "it" is Mrs. X? *Giovanni* Well, no, in that case it's a very scary time and we should run. ~~~~~ But before she can stand, her body starts to convulse. Muscles stretch, bones pop, tissues reform. Mrs. X was changing, growing. Her hands grew into sharp claws, her mouth contorted into a wicked smile of sharp teeth, and then... she grew, almost another two feet; it was too much for her burnt trench coat and it ripped off, revealing her disgusting figure, then in a final convulsion, her stomach split open and revealed a large cancerous eyeball. ~~~~~ *Everyone is in catatonic shock. ~~~~~ XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Monster Info: XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Name: Black Tyrant #0 Type: Mrs. X Final Form Height: 10 Feet Weight: ? ~~~~~ I really should look in to buying a scale at wal-mart... ~~~~~ The mutated Tyrant form of Mrs. X. Can anything stop it? XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX Jill: Oh hell.... Claire: What now? ~~~~~ WE FUCKING KILL LK! ACK! *Runs for dear life around the weight machines ~~~~~ Tobias: What else? Kill it! - Everyone fires at the monster, and Tobias even hits it with four rockets, but nothing seems to damage it. ~~~~~ *Or LK! Boy, he's agile. ~~~~~ Then, fed up with being shot, she attacks; she rushes Giovanni and stabs him with her claws, lifting him high in the air and then tossing him off of his impalement to flop to the ground. Chris: Oh no. Ash: Giovanni! ~~~~~ *Everybody stops chasing LK and stares at the TV screen ~~~~~ -Giovanni lies there, dying, coughing up blood. As the monster jumps back and scans for a new target. ~~~~~ Wow! This is exciting! A main character has been mortally wounded! This means the series is going to end soon and we can all go home! Yay? ~~~~~ Chris: Leon, Claire, take him back into the transport! Leon / Claire: Right! -Leon and Claire carefully lift Giovanni and carry him away as he meekly groans in pain. ~~~~~ Damn, that usually means he's going to live. ~~~~~ Tobias: This is the strongest monster I’ve seen in a long time.... I’ve never thought it would come to this again... ~~~~~ *Tobias* My Multi-dick powers just... aren't... enough.... ~~~~~ Ash: Tobias? Tobias: I won’t let another person die, just for a monster’s blood lust. It’s been a few years, but.... -Tobias closes his eyes, puts his hand to his head, and concentrates. ~~~~~ *Tobias* Multi-dick Man powers... ACTIVATE!!! ~~~~~ Jill: What is he doing? Has he lost it? ~~~~~ *Tobias* Multi-dick Man transform into... MULTI-ASS MAN!!! ~~~~~ -Tobias’s eyes fly open and the monster is engulfed in flames. Chris: What the hell was that? ~~~~~ The meanest burrito-induced fart this side of Metropolis. ~~~~~ -Tobias points his hand toward the monster and an electric bolt flies fries the Tyrant. Misty: What’s happening? ~~~~~ *wistfully* You're witnessing the rebirth of the greatest superhero the world has ever seen... ~~~~~ -Tobias fires a flame burst at the monster. ~~~~~ *Everybody makes farting noises ~~~~~ Ash: Did Umbrella do something to him? ~~~~~ Duh, kid. You know, it would actually make sense if it did, considering his extreme amount of genetalia and sphincters. ~~~~~ -The Tyrant falls to its knees and then flat on its face. ~~~~~ *Tobias* Yes, not even the mighty Mrs. X on steriods is a match for the Mighty Multi-ass man! ~~~~~ Tobias: Tonsei has probably had time to escape by a back exit by now. Forget him, Wesker is a much bigger problem. Our next stop is a complex on Crimson Island. Everybody get back on the transport. ~~~~~ *Tobias* Multi-ass Man squad HOOOO!!! ~~~~~ Chris: Tobias, what was that back there!? ~~~~~ Chris, you really don't want to know. ~~~~~ Tobias: It’s a long story, I’ll tell you on the way. ~~~~~ *Tobias* You should feel honored, I don't give out my secret identity and backstory easily. ~~~~~ Next up: Pokéball: Evil 9 -Final Assault- -=Part I=- ~~~~~ Hey! Look at that title! I was right, we're approaching the end of the series!!! *Jumps up and down with excitement* *The SUL is rocked by an explosion, TOM falls over. Okay, now you're just mocking me on purpose. Who is? The narrat- oh forget it. What the heck just happened? I don't know, but I'm worried. Let's go check it out! *Everyone pours out of the gym, leaving CATS and Duckman inside. They work their way back up to the lounge to find... GASP! *Efluie and SSL's Anthro Espeon are locked in a struggle of life and death, their psychic energy tearing apart the lounge, most it getting sucked up the plothole. Ixies is cheering on Efluie and Reef is very unconsious and beat up on the floor. TOM rushes past them to see what's going on. Well this is certainly an interesting situtation. You're telling me... *Sweatdrop* *Off-camera* Um... guys...? *Everyone carefully works their way past the dueling eefui What is it TOM? We have a problem. Remember when I said we should be going home soon? Well, sooner than you all think. There's a hole in the side of the ship in Reef's quarters and we're not only losing air fast, but crashing into the atmosphere as well. WHAT!?! Well that certainly sucks. *To be continued!!!*