Subject: [MST][OT] Ami Path: lobby!ngtf-m01.news.aol.com!audrey04.news.aol.com!not-for-mail Lines: 944 X-Admin: news@aol.com From: wolfvain2@aol.comm (Wolfvain) Newsgroups: alt.games.nintendo.pokemon.hentai Date: 21 Oct 2001 03:32:10 GMT Organization: AOL http://www.aol.com Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=utf-8 Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit Message-ID: <20011020233210.12702.00000337@mb-fz.aol.com> Hi ya there! I have finally decided on a name for my MSTs series. Welcome to ANIME LEMON THEATER 5000 ½. This is number three of my MSTs. Yay me! So, get yourself some Swiss Miss and enjoy the MST. Now, on to the disclaimer! Disclaimer: This lemon was MSTed without the Authors permission. If there is no author name on a lemon stating he wrote it, it is considered public domain. The "Happy Birthday Song" is copyrighted and is not in the public domain. Go figure. Pyron is owned by Capcom. All copyrights to him go to them. Vash and the small black cat is owned by yasuhiro nightow / shonen gaho-ahs, tokuma shoten, jvc. That's a hell of a long name even for a Japanese company. Aisha Clan-clan is owned by SOTSU AGENCY, SUNRISE, INC. and I'm so glad they made her. MST3K, the nanites, and anything else related to MST3K belong to creator Joel Robinson and to Best Brains inc. Harle belongs to Square Co. Lucky Basterds. My company of Spanky Co. owns Jace, and the name Anime Lemon Theater 5000 ½. I couldn't think of any other company names at the time, all right! Backstory: After being defeated in his own dimension, Pyron, being pure energy, reformed in this dimension after being sucked through a wormhole. On earth he found the remains of the SOL, some tapes of the experiments, and some nanites (the really, really, really small robots). He went to the moon where the nanites built him a base, a new ship that he named the Satellite of Lemons, and an anime/game character extractor. Pyron studied the surviving tapes and decided to take the idea as his own. So he kidnapped his first prisoner from earth using a ham and cheese sandwich on a string, then he gathered two anime characters from two different shows. Now he has a new captive from the Crono Cross game. The captives are: The video game freak earthling, Jace. The feline powerhouse and garbage disposal unit, Aisha Clan-Clan, from Outlaw Star. The sexy harlequin and dragon god, Harle, from Chrono Cross. The man who has 60 BILLION double dollars on his head, Vash the Stampede, from Trigun. And now on to the torture.... Err…. No, wait, I mean torture. Episode 3: Lemony Finds When we last left out crew of the SOL, Jace had pressed a button that opened a trap door underneath their feet. So they went falling down a deep dark hole. And they're still falling. *The crew are still screaming. * Jace: *Stops screaming * You know this is one long fucking hole. *The others stop, and have a questionable look on their faces. * Aisha: Yea. What the hell is going on? Harle: Beats me. Jace: Anyone want to play twenty questions? Aisha: This isn't that time for that Jace! Vash: Jace, how long have we been falling? Jace: *looks at watch. * Umm, A week. All: What! Aisha: That's impossible! Jace: No, there's a way. You see in your universes, time can temporally pause. Although, you do not notice it, people in my universe do because we have to wait another day to see the next episodes of your shows or continue the game from the night before. Since there are three such presence on this ship, time naturally slows down for me as well. This force doesn't seem to be affecting my watch yet. Yet, the opposite is also true. Month's even years in your universe can pass within a single day in my universe. I would feel these effects as well. Pyron is no exception either since he is from an anime universe. We are all on the same, how can I put this, time frame as it where. While earth is on a completely different time frame than us. Of course this is all in theory. All: * mouths hang open. * Jace: What! You're looking at me like I have a tail growing out of my ass. Harle: No, its just zat…. Aisha: That actually made sense. Jace: * eyes lower to stare at Harle's breast.* Oh, I'm sorry. It won't happen again. Harle: Do you mind if you look us in ze face instead of looking at my breasts when you zay zat. Jace: * still looking at Harle's breasts. * What did you say? Vash: *Slaps Jace in the back of the head. * Pay attention and stop looking at her breasts. Jace: But, your looking at theirs too. Vash: Shut up! *Harle and Aisha now have a pissed off look in there faces. * Vash: Er, um, So how long have we been falling in this time frame? Jace: About twenty minuets. Harle: I don't see how that's any better. Aisha: So when do you think we'll hit the bottom, Jace? Jace: If I'm correct and if I have studded my anime correctly it should be… *Before Jace could finish they all came crashing down into a hallway. * Jace: … in the middle of this sentence. Harle: Hey, zat wasn't zat bad. Aisha: Ha! This wasn't anything a Ctarl-Ctarl couldn't handle. Jace: Um, Aisha, do you mind. Aisha: What is it? *Aisha looks down to see that Jace and Vash had broken Harle's and her fall.* Aisha: Oh. *Harle and Aisha get up off the boys and help them up.* Aisha: Now where the fuck are we? *The group looks around in the hallway. They see some doors and a big mirror behind them.* Jace: *looks at mirror. * Cool. *Jace looks at himself in the mirror. He has long brown hair, green eyes, stands about 5 Foot, 9 in and he looks a little like Tom Cruse. He's wearing a blue Piccolo shirt, blue jeans that have holes in the knees, and tennis shoes. * Vash: Hey Jace, look at this. Jace: Ok. * Goes over to a door with Vash. * Aisha: *looks in the mirror. * Aw, that fall really messed up my hair. Harle: Never mind that. Let's keep looking. Aisha: You know your makeup is messed too. Harle: What, really? * Checks her makeup in the mirror. * *Jace opens the door wider, and a small black cat walks out.* Small Black Cat: Meow? * Walks away* Vash: What's in there? Jace: You know, I think our bedrooms. Vash: Great! Harle: *still looking in mirror. * All right! Aisha: * also still looking in mirror. * Perfect! Jace: Knock that off you two and get over hear so you can find your room. *Aisha and Harle turn and walk over to Jace and Vash, But they fail to see the mirror become dark and with a figure forming within the mirror. The group goes to each and every room and makes a great discovery. * Vash: They're all the same. Harle: One bed, one bathroom, and one closet. Aisha: This is outrageous! A Ctral-Ctral would never sleep in such under furnished rooms! Jace: It isn't so bad. Aisha: Are you blind! Why the hell do we have to sleep like this?! ????: Perhaps I could answer that for you. Aisha: *Turns around* You better or I'll …. * Sees Pyron face in the mirror* Pyron: Or what? Aisha: n-n-nothing. Pyron: I did not furnish your room because you are my….. PRISONERS! Jace: Ok. Ok, you don't have to yell. Pyron: *looks at Jace* Damn. I hoped you where dead. Jace: You and many, many others. Pyron: Anyway, your lemon is nearly ready. So get ready. Aisha: But I'm really hungry. Pyron: Too bad! Just get ready to be transferred to the living room. *Pyron's face disappears returning the mirror to normal. * Vash: Well at least we found something. Aisha: Yea, too bad it wasn't worth finding. Harle: I wonder how Pyron plans to get us back to the living room? *Suddenly the mirror opens up and a big vacuum hose comes out and begins to suck up the crew.* All: Ahhhhh! * A hole opens up in the ceiling where the crew came crashing down into the living room. * Jace: Well, at least we know where we are now. Aisha: Whatever. * They all stand up * Vash: Jace, I want to know something. Jace: Shoot. Vash: I would if I still had my gun. Jace: *sweat drop* Your question. Vash: Yea, how long did take from when we landed in the hallway to right now in your universe time frame? Jace: * looks at watch * I don't know. Aisha broke my watch. Aisha: Are you saying I'm fat?! *The lemon sign goes off* Jace: To the theater! Aisha: Shit. Harle: We better get going. *Cloud Strife's Buster Sword* *6, A picture of Tracy getting raped by Godzilla* *5, Gundam Deathscythe Hell in a cool pose. * *4, A giant free-for-all between all the characters of Toonanumi * *3, A group pic of the girls from the FF series sans any clothing. * *2, Pyron getting his ass kicked by Donavon. * *1, A sign reading Warning: Lemon can cause Blindness and Death. * Vash: We really need to get a better paint job on the doors. Jace: Don't worry, I'll take care of it later. Heheheheh. >Ami's sexual experiences started at the age of fourteen. Vash: Sexual experiences do not include her teddy bear fucking her. >After staying after school very late, Aisha: Until Twelve midnight. Jace: I never could understand how she could like school THAT much. >she was confronted by two Jace: Rabid Mexican fairies armed with self-launching dildos and ground to air spanking paddles. Vash: Er, I guess your feeling better. Jace: Lots better. > of her classmates. They were very direct and asked plain out: Aisha: What would you do for a Klondike Bar? >"May we rape you? We'll pay!" Harle: At least zey are polite about it. >Ami's answer was no, but they raped her anyway. Vash: What a big fucking surprise. Aisha: There are no surprises, only an idiotic plot. >Joe Jace: The wimpy guy from digimon? > grabbed the neck of her Aisha: Banjo. >collar and ripped. Vash: It a new one. Aisha: (Joe) Talk back to me will you! >Each button of her uniform popped off one by one, Harle: Hitting each one in the eye, blinding them. > exposing Vash: The truth about hair loss. >breasts just barely held in by her bra. Kai, Jace: Oh my god! They brought King Kai into this! Harle: Just what we need, a rapeing roach. >on the other hand Aisha: He's the king and can do as he damn well pleases. >had begun groping under her skirt and had slipped his hand inside her panties. Jace: Where he found a parallel universe, filled with squirrels and killer steaks that terrorize the world. Aisha: Stop that. Jace: Aww. >Ami dropped her books and tried to fight them off, but to no avail. Harle: You mean zay did all that without he reacting until now? Vash: She must be a victim of Delayed Reaction Syndrome. >They wrestled her to the ground. Joe fondling her breasts out of the tight bra, >Kai's finger probing deep into her womb. Aisha: (Scientist) The probe has located something. Harle: (Head Scientist) What is it? Aisha: (Scientist) It's the Taco Bell Dog. >Joe began to unbuckle his belt, but as he did, the buckle hit Ami in the head and >knocked her out. Jace: Must have been a Texas belt buckle, the kind you see people named Bubba Joe Bob wearing. >When she awoke, she was covered Vash: In chili. Aisha: *stomach growls* Don't mention food. I'm so hungry. >in cum. It was in her mouth, her eyes, all over her chest, in her womb, and she >could even feel it inside her butt. As she got up to collect her clothes, she felt a >strange feeling between her legs. Harle: She suddenly had a penis. > She reached into her vagina and pulled out a wad Vash: Of C-4 that she had been saving for such an occasion. > of cash. She counted it. $50! Aisha: The magic cunt fairy gave her a visit I see. Jace: That makes me wish I had a cunt too. *Everyone stares a Jace* Jace: *coughs* Forget what I said. >This gave her an idea, which she formulated as she pulled her panties and bra >on. Harle: (Ami) When ze author goes to sleep, I'll pore gasoline on him and set him on fire. >As she slipped into her skirt and what was left of her shirt. First off, she would >have to buy a new school uniform. Vash: And an AK-47. >The next day she approached Joe and Kai Harle: Turned into Sailor Mercury and blasted zere assess to ze moon. > with this proposal: "I will let you and any of your friends rape me after school on >whatever day you want." But this was her condition: she would charge $50 per >person per orgasm. Jace: Man, I didn't know Ami was such a slut. Aisha: No, just the authors fucked up imagination. Jace: I wish he would just stop writing this, and go back to rapeing his couch. >She also reserved the right to Aisha: Dance the cha-cha. >charge extra for various reasons (i.e. if they wanted to ruin her school uniform, or >cause pain to her (like pummeling her with fists or fucking her when she wasn't >wet), Jace: impaling her on spikes, making her eat a sandwich, forcing her to watch Jerry Lewis films. >etc.) They agreed and met her after school in the darkened hallways. There >were five of them >the first night. Vash: Joe and Kai brought T.K., Mojo Jojo, and Freeza. Jace: Freeza is gay. Vash: No he isn't. Jace: Ok then, why did he always have buff, well hung, guys surrounding him at all times? Vash: …… Good point. >At first, she only saw Joe. He ran up and grabbed her arms, forcing her against >the wall. He took out a knife and began to cut each button off of her school >uniform. Harle: Joe must have a button fetish. >Threatening that he would kill her if she screamed. Ami, of course, knew this >was all done to increase his pleasure, so she went along with it. Joe pulled her >shirt back roughly and looked in dismay at her plain cotton bra. "What is this >crap", he screamed. Jace: (Ami) Well I couldn't find a bathroom so… *Whap* Aisha: That's as far as you go with that. >He punched her in the stomach. Ami fell to the floor. "I was expecting some >sexy lingerie, >bitch!" Aisha: Who said that? Harle: Don't know, maybe god did. Aisha: Knowing the author, you maybe right. >He kicked her in the stomach again. Ami felt as if she were going to throw up. Vash: Instead she grew wings and flew away. > She now felt a second person come up behind her and begin to lift her skirt up. >"Same at this end", she heard Kai say. Harle: Is lingerie a mandatory ware in school systems today? Jace: Yes, and also mandatory on all Satellites. So if you would strip…. *Smack* Jace: Ow! Harle: I don't zink so. Jace: Awww. >He kicked her right in the pussy. Vash: I thought Luna was Sarena's cat. >Now she lay flat on the ground. The cold marble stone pressing against her >semi-exposed chest. She was in immense pain. Aisha: No Shit! We thought she laughing for joy! > A third person turned her over. "Who gives a shit", he said, "it comes off >anyway". Jace: Exactly what I say on Christmas morning. >And he ripped her bra off. This man was the first one that night to show any of >his skin. Vash: Too bad it wasn't on him at the time. >He pulled his penis out, waiting a few seconds before it became erect. Jace: Then the Happy Hatchet Man came out chopped it off and started poking him in the eye with it. Aisha: What the hell are you doing Jace? Where trying to KEEP our sanity. Jace: I'm just giving these bastereds what they deserve, and besides I already lost mine when I was little. *Everyone looks at Jace again.* Jace: I mean my sanity. Others: Oh. > Then he stuck it between her breasts and began moving it back and forth. Harle: (Penis) This is one damn boring roller coaster ride. > She felt others, Vash: She can use the force? Aisha: (Ami) Help me Obi-wan Kaslultbi. > sloppily removing her panties and tearing out pubic hair with it. She stifled a >scream. Harle: (scream) Don't you stifle me! >"What the fuck??!", said an unknown fourth person, Vash: The author, being so fucking lazy, didn't bother giving the new guys names. Jace: Why should he? There is no plot to put them in. >"Why isn't she shaved?" Harle: (Ami) Sorry, ze lawn mower is in ze shop. >Then she felt the cold metal of a Vash: Stethoscope. Jace: The cruel weapon of doctors everywhere. >knife slide in between the lips of her sex. This feeling scared her and she arched >her back. The man on top of her pushed her back down with immense strength Aisha: Of a five-year-old. >and continued his journey toward orgasm. She narrowly escaped being cut by >the knife. "Next time, bitch", she heard from the vicinity of her legs, Jace: Great, now the author as given her a talking pussy. Harle: (pussy) What the fuck made you think this was a good idea you bitch?! >this was a fifth person, "You better be shaved." Vash: (5th guy) You're beard is so prominent. >The man on top of her was beginning to move quicker and quicker. Then he >stopped... Harle: Yay! It's over, let's go. * Heads for the doors. * Aisha: Oh no you don't. Sit right back down. Harle: *gets back in her seat* Not even Monsieur Links was zis cruel. >waiting for something. Jace: He's waiting to get his ass waxed > Ami waited too. Vash: Must be a two for one rape special. >Then he slapped her. "Open your mouth, you cunt!" Harle: (Ami's Cunt) Make me cock sucker! >She obeyed. Aisha: Slut. >The man began his pleasure again. At the same time, Vash: Somewhere in the world an Indian is crying. Harle: Zomeone must be forcing him to read bad lemons too. > she felt someone enter her between the legs. Jace: It was a hobbit back from a hard day's work at the whore mines. *whap* Aisha: Nock it off Jace or I'll rip you open and hang you with your own intestines. Others: O.O *Sweat Drop * Jace: A little testy aren't we? Aisha: A Catrl-Catrl girl would never EVER take this kind of shit! Vash: There are two reasons for that. One: She's not A Catrl-Cartrl. Aisha: And Two? Vash: The author is a jackass who has never met a girl before except for the inflatable ones. > 'Not wet... Harle: (Ami) My paint job is finally dry. >extra money', she thought. Then she felt something warm enter her mouth Jace: A space heater. >and realised that Aisha: She has the power to kill the authors of bad lemons. > one of her 'assailants' had his penis in her mouth. He already had a little bit of >cum on the tip from his excitement between her breasts. Finally, he came into >her mouth. Vash: Wait a sec., wasn't his penis already in her mouth? > Ami nearly threw up the moment her tongue came in contact with it, but held >on. She choked both from the cum and the penis hitting the back of her throat. >Her eyes were watering. Harle: The flowers. >The man finally pulled his penis out of her mouth. Vash: The man? They're fucking 13! Jace: In bad lemons, the legal fucking age is one. Aisha: He saw Santa and his elves with bazookas armed and ready to fry his ass. >Then he dried it off on her shirt and walked away. Now the man inside of her >pussy gave her an >instruction: Aisha: (man in pussy) I want you to put shelves in here, a nice hardwood floor there, and PS2 here. Jace: *sniffles* God I miss my PS2. Aisha: Don't worry Jace, its not like you spent every dime you had saved for three years doing the grossest odd jobs on the planet. Then, after getting it, you spent every waking moment playing those games, slowly working your way through tuff battles and finding every secret without the help of a guide. Jace: *baling* Oh God! Why didn't you take me instead? *Leans over and cry's on Harle's shoulder* Harle: Aisha! Aisha: What?! > "Struggle", was all he said. Vash: Then the world ended. The end. Harle: I love happy endings. Vash: Hopefully the authors end will be as painful as possible. >She maneuvered to try to get his penis out of her, but he grabbed her waist and >held on. Ami began to squirm. The man tried to hold her by the waist but >couldn't. He grabbed her hands and pushed them to the floor. All the while, he >was moving in and out of her. Aisha: (Ami) In or out! Makeup you're fucking mind you bastered! >She tried struggling harder and he slapped her. Jace: *sits up and stops crying * With a trout. Aisha: Mmmm, fish. > He continuously slapped her until she stopped struggling. Vash: A trout is a powerful weapon indeed. Jace: That's nothing. You should see what a blue marlin could do. Aisha: Stop it with the fish. >This was fine with him, he grabbed her Vash: Bunnies > breasts Vash: I guess you can call them that too. >with both hands and began squeezing them and using them as a purchase Harle: Purchase? Vash: The author is thinking about the inflatable woman again. >with which to thrust himself inside of her harder. Every time he thrusted, Aisha: The spell checker would brake. >she would arch her back, as if in pain. Because frankly, she was. Jace: (Ami) I am, and don't call me Frankly. >But the arching seemed to increase his enjoyment even more. He came inside of >her, she could feel his body shaking Harle: Yay! He's having a seizure. Others: YAY! >with the pleasure of his orgasm. Then he pulled it out and walked away. Jace: Into a bee hive, then an army ant nest, then into a volcano, then into a mad penguin pen… *Whap!* Aisha: Do you like getting hit Jace? Jace: Hey, I'm just doing my job. >Joe was next. Jace: He walked into…. *Whap!* Aisha: Shut up! >He sat down at her head and told her to turn over. Harle: To side two. >She did and found herself staring right at his penis. Vash: It took her five minuets to find it. Aisha: (Ami) I just can't….oh. Is that it? Vash: (Joe) No. Aisha: (Ami) Better the magnifying glass. > "Suck it", he said. Harle: (Ami) I still can't see it. Jace: (Joe) Oh that's right. I don't have one. > She hesitantly took his piece of warm Vash: Pie >flesh into her mouth and was about to Harle: Bite it off. Jace: Girls: the all-natural circumcision device. >begin when she was startled by a strange feeling. Aisha: She turned into a mushroom. >It was a penis in her butt! Startlement quickly turned into anguish as Vash: She realized it was Godzilla. *Whap!* Asiha: Don't start Vash. > the man moved into her narrowest passage and began taking his pleasure. Jace: That reminds me of my prostate exam. Vash: How? Jace: Well it all started normal, then he stuck his finger up my ass started to find my prostate. Aisha: That sounds..er…normal for that kind of exam. Jace: Yeah, well it took him 30 minuets to find it. Harle: Ewww. >She tried to ignore it as much as she could and took Joe's penis into her mouth. >She sucked it and moved it about with her tongue. As the pain in her rear >became more accute, it became more apparent in her face, which was already >red. Aisha: What color did it turn then, Plaid? >She couldn't breath well with the penis in her throat. All: No shit! >And every time it hit the back of her throat, Vash: He won a cagier. >she gagged. The pain and the gagging made tears begin to roll down her face. >She heard Joe say: Harle: I AM the fairy god fucker. >"Good. Good." The tears obviously pleased him, so she stopped trying to shut >out the pain and let it all hit her. More tears ran in torrents down her face. Harle: Great now ze author making up words. Aisha: No, "torrents" is a word. It means "a violently rushing stream". Harle: Well, it's too late in ze lemon to try to impress us with fancy words. >The man behind her finished and left his cum inside her butt to slowly dribble >out. Jace: Well that's a visual image I can do without. > She couldn't help but think: All: Meow meow meow meow, meow meow meow meow. > "How the hell is he going to get rid of the smell??!" Vash: Haven't they ever heard of soap? Harle: I think acid would get rid of the smell, along with other things. >But not for long as Jace: The guys from AGNPH came in and beat the shit out of Joe, then started to fuck Amy. Harle: Who? Jace: No one. > Joe's thrusts were becoming faster and harder and pretty hard to stand. It was s >struggle just breathing now. Aisha: The extra s is for….ummm… Vash: Nothing? Aisha: …yea. >His penis seemed to fill her whole mouth. Harle: Don't let zat sentence fool you. She just has a small mouth. >So she was relieved when she felt Vash: The Alien burst from her chest, and started to kill everyone. >more warm cum squirt into her mouth. Joe was moaning. Jace: (Joe) I left the slut on back home. >Then he pulled it out Harle: A 22 magnum and shot the authors cock off. >and let more cum squirt out into her eye. She cringed, but Joe didn't mind, >because he was Vash: An ass. Harle: A cock sucking bastered. Aisha: A shit licking fuck up. Jace: The Pope? >already done. He had a bit of a stunned look on his face and he was shivering. > 'I must have been good.', she thought. Joe eventually pulled his pants up and >walked off. Vash: Eventually? Jace: So he just stood there eating a Mars bar and reading War and Peace without pants on for a wile? Aisha: Mmmm….Mars bar. > All that was left now, was Kai. Harle: Ahhh, yes. Ze cockroach. > He said to her: "Just rest...I'll do all the work." Jace: And with that he reviled that he had pussy too. So began to fuck his cunt with his cock. Harle: O.O Vash: You need help Jace. Lots and lots of help. >Then he sat on top of her stomach and began to masterbate. He derived visual >pleasure from the state her body was in. Bruises on her breasts from Aisha: Vash groping her. Vash: I would never do that. Well, to someone that young anyway. >violent hands. Her shirt half hanging off her arms, the buttons strewn all over the >hallway.The tears and cum all over her face and dribbling out her mouth. The >pool of cum that had gathered around her legs from when it dribbled out. Her >skirt pushed up around her waist to allow access to her pussy. Aisha: Oh, it's the Pamela Anderson story. >He drew on thoughts from the previous night: Jace: When he was walking home and saw two dogs humping. >Ami's unconcious body covered in cum. His cum. And blood that had trickled out >of her pussy--obviously, it had been her first time. Then he thought about the >whole situation... Harle: (Kai thinking) Five school boys rapeing a girl inside the school, Amy turning into a whore, the bad grammar and spelling, and the bad plot. Yep, this is a lemon all right. >the reason he had picked her out of all the other girls in the school. Sure, she >was beautiful, sure she she great hips and breasts. Aisha: It's all plastic surgery. >He looked at her breasts and a shot Vash: Was fired from her nipple, blowing his head off. >of pleasure ran through him. Jace: and out the door. Aisha: (pleasure) I'm not getting stuck in this piece of shit lemon. >But the single most exciting thing was that Vash: Race between the slug and the snail. Jace: Poring salt on both of them would be more fun. >he was raping the smartest girl in school. The appeal of someone totally >innocent- Aisha: I'm more innocent than that human. Harle: I think they mean innocent like, pure of heart. Not like, innocent of all charges of assault and battery. Aisha: Shut up! Who asked you anyway? >he was almost sure that she never thought about self pleasure. All: Bullshit! > All this became too much for him to stand and he Jace: Grabbed a mouse shoved it up his ass. Aisha: Then he attached jumper cables to his nipples and started his car. Jace: O.O Aisha: It deserves the flaming we give it. > ejaculated all over her. 'Wow!', he thought, 'there must be a couple spoonfuls >there!' He got up and began to walk away. Then he remembered something. Harle: Meow meow meow meow. Aisha: We already did that joke Harle. Harle: Oops, excuse moi. >He walked back and stuffed money into her pussy-in later ventures, this became >the formal was of giving her her payment. When Ami finally found enough >strength to Vash: Just say no to Ice cream All: *stomachs grows* Ice Cream. > sit up, she found that she ached all over. The boys had been VERY rough that >night. She reached between her legs and pulled out a Vash: SUV. >wet wad of Jace: Wild Will's weed. > cash. $700! Jace: Of course that's in Japanese currency. In the U.S. that would be seven bucks. Aisha: Just great, now she's a seven-dollar whore. >She put her clothes on-or what was left of them-and walked out of the school. Harle: Hey, zat sentence is having a three way with itself. Vash: Crap, if the sex in the lemon is no good, why the hell would it think that a sentence having a three way with itself would be any better? >She rode the subway home. Aisha: Goddamn sexual medifore >She was alone on the train except for a dirty old man who also raped her. Jace: No, Master Roshi! > I mean...can you blame him? All: Hell Yes! > You're alone on the train at night, a lonely old man, there's a pretty, young >school girl with only part of her shirt on and her breasts all but hanging out all >over the place. Harle: If her brests are hanging all over ze place, zen she is a he. >What would you do? Vash: Oh I see now. It was a educational film. Aisha: "How to be a Seven Dollar Whore in Three easy steps." Vash: With guest pimp, Huggy Bear. >He didn't pay her, but Jace: He gave her many sexual diseases instead. >he didn't steal her money, either. So she went home and went to bed. Aisha: And her mom didn't notice anything? Harle: (Amy's Mom) How was school? Aisha: (Amy) I got shit beat out of me, fucked by five boys, and raped by an old guy. You? Harle: (Amy's Mom) About the same. > She woke up the next morning and Vash: Found she was still in the lemon. Jace: (Amy) Son of a fuckbtich damnit! >could barely move, she was so sore. Aisha: But she did have the great sent of pine. > So the boys went to her house after >school and Harle: Fucked her brains out. >carried out their sexual activities there. Harle: Zat's just ze nice way of putting it. >She went through this just about >everyday of her high school life. But by >her own accord. All: Bullshit! >Many times they had told her: Jace: (Boys) We are the walrus, coo coo ca chu! > If you want us to stop doing this to you, >we will. Vash: There're quote marks budget must have dried up. Aisha: I'm not surprised, as far as I could tell they could only afford to get single quote marks. > But she never asked them to. Harle: The duct tape took care of that. >I mean...how else was she going to put >herself through college? Aisha: What! Collage?! Vash: Doesn't she have an IQ of 300 or something like that? Jace: Yea, she could be a druglord instead. Harle: It's finally over, let's go. *EXIT* *In the Living Room* Harle: Thank god, it's over. Vash: For now anyway. *Aisha's stomach growls * Aisha: I'm gonna starve if we don't find some food. Jace: I'm really hungry too. *The monitor springs to life with Pyron's face on the screen.* Pyron: So still standing, eh? All: Screw you! Pyron: Heheheh. Your next lemon will….. *Suddenly the picture starts going in and out of focus. * Pyron: What the hell are you doing! ????: The camera is going out of control. Aisha: What the fuck happening over there? Pyron: You fool, don't let the camera zoom out! ????: I'm trying! *Sparks fly into the picture and loud banging noises are heard. * ????: Work you stupid piece of crap. Jace: Having some troubles, are we? Pyron: It's within my control. ????: All right, got it. * The sparks stop flying, the banging noises have stopped, and the picture becomes normal. * Vash: What the hell was that all about, and who else is there? Pyron: None of your damn business. Anyway tomorrow will be the day that you call me master. Jace: You're not going to wear tight leather hot pants that day, are you? Pyron: Will that add to your pain? Jace: Umm, Yes? *Pyron starts laughing evilly, then the monitor turns off. Everyone looks at Jace. * Jace: What?! Harle: We never got to ask him about the food. Aisha: *slightly mad with hunger* I need something to eat now! *Grabs hold of Vash's left arm, and take a big bite.* *CLANG.* Aisha: *in pain* ARGGG! My teeth! Harle: Clang? Vash: My left arm not real, it's a prosthetic arm. Harle: Oh. Jace: I've got it! Vash: Then don't get near me. Jace: No, I don't mean it like that. Maybe. Vash: *sweat drop.* Jace: Anyway, I mean we could take the elevator. Aisha: *feeling beater. * What elevator? Jace: That one. *Jace points to the elevator which is right next to the hallway door.* Harle: Where ze fuck did zat come from? Jace: What the hell are you talking about? It's been there all the time. All (except Jace) : *Facefalt* Aisha: Well what are we waiting for?! * Aisha grabs Vash and Harle.* Vash: What the hell are you doing? Harle: I don't want zo go!. *Aisha drags them into the elevator. * Aisha: Jace, get your ass in this elevator. Jace: That's ok, I'll just….. Aisha: NOW DAMNIT! Jace: Yes Ma'am. *Jace rushes into the elevator. Just as the doors close.* Harle: Now what? Jace: No problem. We just push a button. Vash: Oh no you don't Jace. I'm gonna choose the button to push. Jace: Awww. Aisha: Just push one! Vash: All right, all right. *Looks at the many buttons.* Harle: Well? Vash: What the fuck? Aisha: What? Vash: It's a "Place where the food is kept" button. Jace: That's convenient. Vash: Here we go. *As Vash pressed the button the elevator slowly went downward.* Jace: Well looks like this is going to take a wile. *As Jace leans back he slips, and hits the "Express Button". Elevator voice: You have just the express button. Please select speed. Aisha: Oh Shit. Elevator voice: You have just selected "Oh Shit" speed. Harle: Aisha! Elevator voice: We hope that you survive trip and hopes you're not stupid enough to EVER use this speed again. Thank you. Vash: There is a speed called "oh shit"? That's strange. Jace: *Gets up* I wonder why the speed is called "Oh Shit"? *Suddenly, the elevator went straight down going so fast that they all hit the sealing.* All: OH SSHHIITT! =============================== Well, there they go again. Will the crew survive the express ride? What can they expect to see when they get there? Who was the person operation the camera. Why didn't Pyron want the camera to zoom out? What would you choose? Boxers or briefs? Is Jace's theory about time true, or is he just screwing around with them All (well, maybe not all) in the next Anime Lemon Theater 5000 ½. ______ Wolfvain The MSTer "Good...Bad...I'm the guy with the gun."-Bruce Campbell "Look at me lady, even i don't know where the hell I am half the time." - Jay