**** RANDOM MSTING **** >>RANMA 1/2 ALTERNATE UNIVERSES ********************* This story takes place in an alternate universe.. see for yourself ;) *********************<< AI : Oh , great , an AU fic . >>**** PART WIONE I : THE TENTICURLES !! ****<< CAMERON : O_o BARANI : >O.O< CAMERON : It's not a good sign when the author can't even spell "one" . AI : What the hell is a tenticurles ? >>Ramna quickly made his way to the Jysenko Springs, where he and his friend Akane played every day. It was on Ranama's 10th birthday that it happanedd..<< KASUMI : But ... but .... Ranma and Akane didn't even know each other when they were ten ! AI : I guess that's where the AU comes in ^_^ KASUMI : And the Jusyenko Springs are in China ! What the hell is Ranma doing there , playing with Akane ? AI : Uh .... more AU ? CAMERON : It doesn't make sense , and you KNOW it . >>**** Ranma ran down the stone stpes to the Jysenko Springs. He was waiting for Akane, but he couldn't wait to swim. He took off his cloths and put on his swimming truncks. He stepped into thue water. << BARANI : ..... Cameron , my brain's hurting already ... CAMERON : Blue water ? The water ? Thue water ? >>"Hm I wonder where this cave geos.." Ranma swam into a little cave rather than wait for Akane. Then Akane appears.<< AI : How ironic . >>"Ranma where are you here are your clothes but i can't find you !" Eanma could hear Akane calling but didn't want her to know where he was right now.<< KASUMI : Eanma ?! >>He herd Akane spashing into the water, he wanted to hid from her. So he climbd out onto a rock and ran off wearing just his trunck. Then he was stopped by a woman.<< CAMERON : I just want to know what a "trunck" is ... >>"Would you like to be like Akane ?" "What do you man ?"<< CAMERON : *Stoned* Like , what do you , man ? BARANI : Huh ? CAMERON : I don't know . AI : Would he like to be like Akane ... constantly PMSing , unable to cook ... well , sure , he might like that . >>"I'll show you." The woman was naked, and she spread herself out on the ground. << KASUMI : Wow !! That has to be the first sentance without a spelling mistake in it yet ! I'm amazed ! >>"Do you hace one of these ?" Ranam peered curiously at the vagian. "it's pretty.. what is it ?" "It's something that only people like Akane have.. you have something else.." The womna quickly pulled down Ranama's speedos to reveal his small boy-cock. << CAMERON : Ugh , 10-yr-old-sex . AI : Ranma , or Eanma or Ranam or Ranama or whatever the hell he's calling himself now , is ten years old . He's hardly gonna think that the female sex organs are 'pretty' !! >>"Yo have that." "Oh can I have one of yours ?" "okay." << BARANI : Swapsies !! >>The woman got out some water and threw it at Ranma and he turned into a girl. He didn't notice the difference. "OW why did you do that ? I'm all whet now"<< KASUMI : This reminds me of Sven-chan's typing ... would he write something like this ? O.O AI : Sven"-chan"'s told you he's "whet" before ? What DO you talk about ? KASUMI : No , no !! It doesn't matter , *blushes* >>"Look at yourself.."<< CAMERON : .... you're in a crappy lemon . Feel ashamed of yourself . >>Ramna looked down there to see not a cock but a pussy. << AI : Since when was Shampoo in this ? KASUMI : ... ew . >>"Wow did you do that?"<< CAMERON : No , the water did . Duh . >>"yes, but if you want i can make you boy again. but when you go backi nto the water,m you are turingin into a girl. "<< AI : *Holds her head* Whaat ? KASUMI : Watch as plot points are thrown around like they don't matter !! CAMERON : Seriously , WHAT plot points ? KASUMI : Well , I'm sure we're all on tenterhooks here . I mean , the woman might turn Ranma into a boy again !! But when he goes into the water , he's turning into a girl , apparentally !! It's the story of the decade !! AI : Kasumi-sama'd better be being sarcastic . >>"hm I could trick Akanase with this" "Okay. Turn me back into a girl."<< BARANI : Wait ... who said what ? KASUMI : Does it matter ? BARANI : Well , no ... but ... nyau , I'm gonna have a headache !! >>The woman spahed Ranam with hot water and he turned into a boy again.<< CAMERON : I wanna know what 'spahed' is . It sounds kinky . AI : You WOULD think that ... >>He put his speedos back on.<< ALL : *Worship the rare decent sentance* KASUMI : Now if only that sentance didn't conjour up images of a naked 10-year old Ranma . >>"Thank you woman!! hat is your name?"<< AI : No , Hat isn't my name . Little retard . >>"You don't need to know jsut go back and play." Ramna smiled at the woman and went off into the water again. *** "Who are you where's Raname?"<< AI : Who cares about Raname , where's Ranma ? KASUMI : Ph33r Ranma and his many near-identical clones . >>"IO don't know anyone caled that. I'm..I'm nickname is Usako-chan.<< AI : Scary . The author can't even spell "Ranma" , but he/she/they/it CAN spell "Usako-chan" . Odd . KASUMI : "I'm nickname" ? >>hat's your name?"<< CAMERON : ... Hat isn't my name either !! *Whacks Ranma* ... what is it with you and hats ? >>"I'm akane. I'm looking for my best frind called Raname. Ranma is a boy about this high and he's very nice are you sure you haven't sen him ?"<< KASUMI : So now we know that Akane's best friend is called Raname . We also know that Ranma is a boy about that high , and he's very nice . But what have Raname and Ranma got to do with each other ? AI : And what about Ranama , Eanma and the others ? KASUMI : It's a mystery ! >>Rannma smiled. He was fun tricking Akane. "No, I haven't seen Ranma anywhere." *** back in the cave the woman smiled. She had a little surprise for Ajane to have. She clicked her fingers, and set herself near the fron of the cave she was looking forward to."<< BARANI : .... I give up trying to make ANY sense of this . CAMERON : Oh , I gave up ages ago . Don't fight it . >>*** Akane splashed at "Usako", and "Usako" laughed. "Hahahah this is so much fun Akane.. where do you live? I come from mountains." "I live in that place over there!!"<< AI : Actually , I live in a dojo in Japan with my sisters and my father . But for the sake of whatever the hell this story we've got into ... >>Akane poined. << CAMERON : Mmm ... sounds painful . "You want to come in and have a drink?" "Sure I could."<< BARANI : Sure you COULD , but do you want to ? >>Akane walked out, with "Uako" following.<< KASUMI : Uhwhat ? >>**** The woman followed them. " ****<< CAMERON : ..... That was pointless . >>"This is my bedrroom d o you like it?"<< CAMERON : No , it sucks ass . >>"It's nice."<< AI : Ranma , in this fic , is a TEN YEAR OLD BOY !!! How in hell would he find a similarly-aged girl's bedroom "nice" ? It's probebly full of soft toys and stuff !! >>Suddenly the door burst open to revel the woman who was not a woman but a big tenticle beast . Raname didn't know this was the woman.<< AI : O_o KASUMI : Well , no-one saw that coming , I guess . CAMERON : And ... no-one else in Akane's house saw this tentacle beast thunder into the house ? Like , oh , any one of Akane's three sisters ? Or her father ? >>"Hello Ranma and Akane!! I have a surprise at you!!" "THat's not Raname it's Usako" "I don't know what she's been telling you but it's definetly Ranamea. I made her girl boy." "She's a gfirl called Usako!" "No she's a boy called Ranam wathc" The tenticle clicked it's tenticle and Ranma turned into boy. She did it again him girl.<< AI : Can you even click a tentacle ? KASUMI : "I made her girl boy." .... ewww , I'm thinking of Oscar here . >>"You see it's not all I can do tho I can make him both"<< AI : Kaaasummmi-samaaaaaa ...... KASUMI : AWK ! >>"What? Both what?"<< CAMERON : Both mangos !! >>The speedos went to reveal the ten year old's puissy. Then the tenticle clicked and where her pubic was a big ten inch cock burst out. << CAMERON : Where ... her ... pubic .... ten ... inch .... okay , I feel sick now . "Argh waht you do to Ranme tenticle ?"<< "I makxde him and hermaphrotide. Bith you and him. Okay?<< ALL : NO !! >>Part of you on him, part of him on him, part of him in you, part of me in him!!" "What do you mean"<< AI : WE HAVE NO IDEA !!!!! CAMERON : Okay , so , by that logic ... part of Akane is on Ranma , part of Ranma is on Ranma , part of Ranma is in Akane , and part of the tentacle beast is in Ranma .... the HELL !? BARANI : *Pats Cameron* Don't try and make sense of it , Cama-sama . >>A tenticle grabbed Akane and speard her legs open wide to reveal her little pusst. Another grabbd Ranama and shoved his cockintoher. A tenticle went up unto Ranama.<< AI : You'd think that lemon writers would write to try and turn people on . This is just making me want to throw up . >>"Oh Ronama what's this tenticle doing to uss?" "I don't kow I don't like it I like it"<< CAMERON : .... oh .... kaaay ..... >>"hahahahahahah I shall fuck up and until your cum!!" "hahahahahahah I shall fuck you yuntil I want you to stop!!" "hahahahahahah I shall fuck up your big and little!!"<< CAMERON : *Implodes* >>"I don't know what this is Ranama but it s goos!!"<< AI : It's goose ? When did Mousse appear ? >>"Yes I like it too Aajanae!" << KASUMI : How the hell is that even pronounced ? >>"Oh I'm coming into you, Akane!!" "Oh Ranama I want you!" Raname's hot wet sppped slapshed into Akane as he cumms.<< CAMERON : Hot ... wet ... sppped . Sppped . Sounds like an anacronym of some kind . BARANI : Or some kind of narcotic . >> This makes Akane cum and her vagaial walls tighten on Raname and he cums in her and she feels his hot seed spalsheuing her inner walls and this feels goodd says Akane. << CAMERON : I don't care about the seed , what happened to the sppped ? >>After Akane cusm she goes to sleep and the tehticle takes Ranma to his house because he's asleep too. She wiped their heads so they wouldn't amsnisiea so people wtoouldn''t ever goy into the cave again becauzse the woman whoe was the tentical didn't like it. << KASUMI : She wiped their heads so they WOULDN'T "amsnisiea" ? Surely the point of wiping their heads would be to give them amnesia ? >>**** PART TWO : COUNT IT LOSTS OF YEARAS LATER ****<< AI : One ... two ... three ... four ... five ... six .... ugh , I can't be bothered . KASUMI : Losts of years ? Ryoga's in this ? >>Ranama is now older and so is Akane and Ryogo and Shapmoo and Mousse and Genma nad everyone else and Ranma was happy eiyh all of this. << AI : Well , Ranma's hardly gonna run round , "RYOGA !!!! I'M NOT HAPPY WITH YOU BEING THE AGE YOU ARE !!!!! GET YOUNGER *NOW* !!!!!!" , is he ? >>"Oh Akane let's go to the Jysenko springs!!"<< AI : Even though the Jusyenko Springs are in *CHINA* .... >>"Okay !!£<< CAMERON : Only if you pay me !! In British pounds !! £££ >>So that did.<< AI : That ... did what ? >>**** "Oh Ranama this is so much fun!!" "Good oh look there!! S a vave!! Lets go in."<< AI : .... let's NOT , okay ? >>So they did in go, and the woman was there. She wan nakened, and Raomana was getting a boner. "Oh no Akane don't look" "What oh no!! Ramana, you have a hard one!! Do you want to fuck me or something?" Ranam oloks at Akane to se wether she is being sardonic or not and she is. << KASUMI : What the hell is a word like "sardonic" doing in a crap lemon like this ? AI : I'm surprised the author didn't say "sardine" instead , or something . CAMERON : No , that would only have happened if the author had used a spellcheck or something .. AI : Poor machine woulda blown up . >>"Oh Ranma you don't remember me do you" no I don't who are you" I'm your worse nightmare Akane go!" "No I want to stay with Ramana!!" "I see you gre up like you could with a big one let lemt see." >>The speeedesos went out int the wintsonw<< CAMERON : The speedos went out into the winter ? The Winston ? The window ? BARANI : Since it's a cave , maybe 'the water' ? CAMERON : Oh , hush . >>and Ranama blueblushes becuase he is naked with Akane the girl of his dreams but the tenticle woman on't let him. << AI : The woman won't let him blueblush ? How do you stop someone doing that ? KASUMI : And since when has Akane been the girl of Ranma's dreams ? >>2"""Oh no Ryanaa, yu can't have Akane tho she isn't a virjin"<< KASUMI : No , Yuu can't have Akane !! *Grabs Milphrey-Yuu and glomps him* AI : The hell is a "virjin" ? CAMERON : Sounds like some kind of first-time STD . >>"Yes i am not am not am not how would you know << KASUMI : This sounds like any argument from any dubbed episode of Sailor Moon . >>I was thetre<< KASUMI : I was theater ? >>I#ve nevetr seen oyu febefore!! "Oh dear well we'cve met or how would I know your nname" "Oh yesas I didn't hink of that well who are you" CAMERON : And what freaking language are we speaking here ? >>The woman isn't looking or litenting beccause she isn sucking Rnaman off and much as she doesn't like her belubed beign done thus by er Akane is arounse and her jooices are dripping onto the floor one iof the womans hands befcoe s a tennticale. "I re,meber when we were ten you made Afikanma into an hermaptrodite and we had sex.."<< BARANI : She made Africa into a hermaphrodite ? Does Africa know ? CAMERON : Hermaphrodite is the combination of Hermes and Aphrodite ... maybe Afikanma is the combination of Akane and Ranma ? BARANI : Who cares ? CAMERON : Not me . >>"Oh yes you rememebr!" "I DOOOOOO!!!"<< AI : You may now kiss the tentacle beast !! *Throws confetti* >>Akane is cumming already at the sight of her boyfriend being sucked off, and her being fucked by the rtenticle. << CAMERON : Someone's got their priorities mixed up here . >>HEr hips are thrusted to meet it, and the tenticle reaches right into her before it rinfds her clitorise deep insiode of her and rubs it and Akane comes<< AI : Her clitoris-e deep inside of her ? Someone buy the author some biology books ! >>"Oh Ramna!!" "Oh Akane even though we can't be togheter I'm thinking of you" "Am I too so!!" The woman is mad at his and bites his penis but this just makes him cum. << CAMERON : Ye-eah , if something bites my most precious peice of equipment , *I* come . BARANI ? >?.?< CAMERON : .... Don't say a WORD . BARANI : >^.^< >>"AKANNNNEEE!!" "I hate noth of ytou leave this vace and go home" "Okayt"<< AI : And thus , Ranma and Akane started the trek back to their home , which was in JAPAN , after all . >>**** So they are outside and both wearing just swimming. << KASUMI : Wearing just swimming ... CAMERON : Sounds like "tennis" . KASUMI : *Glances at Cameron* CAMERON : *Glances at Kasumi* AI : Maybe Oscar DID have a hand at writing this ... who write it , anyway ? BARANI : It didn't say . AI : Damn ... >>"Akane, you wanna be fucked ?? "<< "Yeah , why not, Raname. I'm barren so I can't get pregnant."<< KASUMI : IRL , almost any girl would be shattered to find this out . But no , to Akane , it just means she can screw Ranma some more . Jeee~z .... >>"That's good, get em off !!"<< CAMERON : Ranma's so SENSITIVE . >>Akane strpis out of ther things and is nakesd in the watrer. "Oh Akane.." >>Rramna slips intop her, and feels the rluine in heis forsking heing streeackhed and he's loving it. He squeezed hetr breasts and sucks them. Then he omes int her and she comes too and they are both tires.<< BARANI : The ... rluine in heis forsking ? I don't even want to KNOW !! AI : Heing streeackhed . Sounds painful . CAMERON : ........ I'm speechless . I really am . >>"Lets go home!!"<< AI : Yes !! Let's go back to JAPAN !! >>Sudeenly it starts aiing and the wter is bad and Ramna changed into a girl. They dion't notice. << AI : The water is bad ? KASUMI : Acid rain ! Woo ! >>**** Ramna wakleked into his father Genma. << BARANI : I don't even want to KNOW what that means . >>"Sorry, I didn't mean-" "Who are yoiu and coming into my gym I outa put Onix on you !! Oh no, wrong anime hahaha!!"<< ALL : *Monotone* Ha . Ha . Ha . Ha . Ha . Ha . Haaaaaugh . >>Genma is seventy but he still needs to get it so he strips and plugens into Ranma who is his daughter.<< ALL : O______O CAMERON : Ugh , I really DO feel sick . AI : It's just the way the author PUTS it ... I mean .... ugh ! >>"OH oh oh I feel like I love you whoever you are!! Your tight and I want to fuck all of you!" After he's fucked Raman he ties her up and fucks her asshole.It's tight and it hurst nuit Gename ais enjoying it. he then fucks her mouth, then her tits. << CAMERON : I don't know what's worse , the incest or the spelling ... >>"Genma, it's me, Ranam..I'm you son!!" He smplashed cold water on him. "Oh Ramno!! Well, I've walwas ated to fuck you"<< ALL : *Raise eyebrows* KASUMI : Yeah . THAT'S like Genma . AI : Come on Kasumi-sama , you're not still looking for IC stuff ? This fic's about as OOC as these things get !! KASUMI : Point ^_^ >>He turns the boy onto his side, and slowly his enlagrgened cock slided into Ranama's ass hole and Ranma can't belive that it's father doing this.<< CAMERON : *Runs behind the seats and throws up* >>Then, Genma turns into a Panda.<< AI : No , no , PLEASE , not beastiality too !! KASUMI : What , so Genma just randomly turned into a panda ? BARANI : Seems like it . >> The bear mounts Ranma and thrusts his cock deep into his son. His furry balls swing against Ranma and the furry pads are pumping the boy-cock underneath him.<< KASUMI : Y'know what ? AI : What ? KASUMI : I'm scared . AI : So am I . KASUMI : No , I mean ... apart from the sheer wrong-ness ... those sentances don't have any spelling mistakes in them . AI : Oh yeah ! But jeez ... I like a bit of yaoi , but this is just disgusting . >>All too soon, Ranma comes. "Oh father do this mroe often!£<< CAMERON : But only if you pay me !! £££ BARANI : *Winces at Cameron* CAMERON : Yeah , I've just realised how wrong that sounded too . AI : Come on , Ranma's just been raped in both forms by both his father's forms !! He's not gonna just randomly want more !! >>"I will doson."<< AI : "I will do , soon" or "I will do , son" ? KASUMI : Either way , I REALLY don't want to know . >>THE END<< ALL : *Cheer and throw ribbons and confetti* >>THAT WAS FUN NO ??<< ALL : NO !!!! >>BAIBAI !! SEEYOU IN MY NEXT FIC, "MISTY AND METAPOD" !! YEAAAA I LOVE POKEMON HETAIN DON'T YOU BAIBAI !!<< AI : ....... Let's just get out of here .