MST3K: Matt and Mimi in "The Instrument of Love"

by James D. Reinbold (don Jaime del Resfriado)
(jdreinbold@hotmail.com)

Synopsis: A "Digimon" fanfic with no Digimon.  Mimi is fascinated with 
Matt's
instrument of love. Imagine Mike and the 'bots relief to find she just likes
his harmonica.



(The Satellite of Love. TOM SERVO and CROW are waiting by a cassette tape
player. MIKE NELSON enters.)

TOM: We've got a cool idea on how to get out of today's fic, Mike!

MIKE: Great! What is it?

CROW: Elevator music. We play really dull, bland music and put the Mads to
sleep.

MIKE: Excellent plan! What have you got to work with? Mantovanni? Lawrence 
Welk?

TOM: Actual Muzak, Mike, as played in real elevators.

MIKE: Oh, ruined music. Which group? Supremes? Seals and Croft?

CROW: Judas Priest.

MIKE: I wasn't aware Muzak did heavy metal.

TOM: Most people aren't. Heavy metal Muzak sounds surprisingly like static.
Here, take a listen.

(TOM turns on the tape. What sounds like white noise plays.)

MIKE: (Yawns.) Yeah. That does sound...like static. Very...soothing. Not
what...I expected (Yawns.) from Judas Priest.

CROW: It's a good thing we turned on our tone-deaf programming, or we'd be 
out
like a light! Kind of like (MIKE collapses and snores.) you.

TOM: This is going to be a great party with both Mike and the Mads out cold!

CROW: Time to take out the garbage. The Mads are calling! Level 11, Tom!


(Onscreen: DR. FORRESTER in Deep Thirteen.)

FORRESTER: Get a move on, Frank!

FRANK (Offscreen): Coming! I gotta wash my hands!

FORRESTER: I told you to go before we called Monkey Boy! (Sees MIKE asleep.)
What's wrong with him?

CROW: We don't know. We're trying to wake him up with heavy metal music. 
Crank
it, Tom!

(Muzak Judas Priest plays.)

FORRESTER: That's the dullest (Yawns.) heavy metal I ever heard.

TOM: You're just not up on your hair bands. Listen, you can almost hear the 
guy
say, "Do it."

(FORRESTER blinks twice and falls asleep. TV'S FRANK enters.)

FRANK: I'm here. (FORRESTER snores.) You're welcome. Hey, is that Rob 
Halford?
Cool!

CROW: Oh, no.

TOM: He likes it. I don't believe it!

FRANK (Sings): Breakin' the law, breakin' the law! DUN-DUN-DUNNNN! Breakin' 
the
law, breakin' the law! (FRANK headbangs into FORRESTER, who wakes up.)

FORRESTER: TURN THAT OFF OR I'LL RUN YOU INTO AN ASTEROID!

TOM: Blast! (Turns off tape.) Almost.

CROW: C'mon, it's just music! What have you got against music?

FORRESTER: Music you want, music you shall have. Your surprise for today is 
a
dissonant ditty coming to us via a Digimon website called "The Princess and 
the Rebel."
It's the place to go for your Daisuke needs....

FRANK: No, it's for Mimi and Yamato fans. I've lined up a romance between 
them
called "The Instrument of Love."

FORRESTER: Oh. Send it, then. And next time, don't put me to sleep. I'm 
cranky
when I first wake up.

FRANK: No more than usual. (Turns a dial.)

MIKE: (Wakes up.) What'd I miss? (Lights flash and horns blare.) Obviously 
not
FANFIC SIGN!


(Doors open into the theater, where a web browser is already downloading the
fanfic. MIKE, TOM, and CROW enter and sit down.)

>The Instrument of Love

MIKE: Keep it clean, guys.

(TOM and CROW groan.)

TOM: And I had all my "mouth organ" jokes ready, too!

>Disclaimer- I don't own Digimon.

CROW: They're Beatrice.

>The production company does.

TOM: And I have no clue who they are.

>This is just a loyal fan's work.All characters displayed in this story are 
>owned and copyrighted by the company.Please don't sue me,I'm flat 
>broke,honest!

MIKE: I can't even afford spaces to put between my sentences.


>'The Instrument of Love.' A Digimon Fanfic Series by Jay Moss-

CROW: Papa was NOT a rolling stone.


>The calm breeze carried the music around the School Field.

TOM: I thought "calm" and "breeze" were mutually exclusive weather 
phenomena.

>To many people,the sound of a harmonica playing was annoying and if 
>anything,disturbed the peace with every note.To many people,it's hard to 
>understand how a person can ever play such an instrument.

CROW: To many people, harmonicas are bad. To many people, harmonicas are
irritating. To many people, harmonicas are less musical than cats in heat. 
To
many people, harmonicas are the work of Satan.

>Why not a piano or a guitar?

MIKE: Ever try carrying a piano in your pocket?

>If the musician preferred using his lips and his breath to play an 
>instrument then,why not a flute?

TOM: Well, maybe some people like the way harmonicas sound. Quit buggin' 'em
about it.


>To many people,why Yamato 'Matt' Ishida played a harmonica was a total 
>mystery.

MIKE: It's not like he was any good at it.


>Mimi Tachikawa,a girl with long brown hair,sparkling red eyes and an 
>attraction to all things pink,was not one of those people.

CROW: She knew he was making do until he could afford a contrabassoon.


>She was however one of the many girls who had a crush on Matt.

TOM: One of the many desperate, lonely girls who would ultimately put on 
forty
pounds and be asked to the prom by a close cousin.

>When you love someone,you want to close to them,no matter what instrument 
>they play.

MIKE: Except bagpipes. Those things can deafen you.

>Mimi was good friends with Matt.They'd known each other for some time 
>now.She,Matt and some other friends like Tai,Sora and everyone else

CROW: You know, some other friends, just...you know, friends.

>would hang out at weekends when their studies were not on their minds.

MIKE: But when they were studying, you couldn't tear them away from the 
books.

>Mimi had always had an urge to be more than just a friend to Matt but,she 
>was always afraid that if she said something,it might ruin the friendship.

TOM: Matt's going to be surprised she really isn't mute.

>Her biggest fear was that Matt would just think of her as a little,immature 
>Schoolgirl.Matt was the coolest guy she knew but,she knew that he could be 
>kind of immature sometimes.

MIKE: Sadly, Matt's biggest fear was that she would think of him as a 
little,
immature schoolboy.

TOM: Aw. That's sad.

>Him and Tai were constantly fighting.

CROW: This relates to Mimi's feelings for Matt somehow, and when we know 
how,
we'll get back to you.


>This time though,Matt wasn't with Tai and the others today.It was recess 
>and he had found a shaded spot under a large oak tree.

CROW (Matt): Hey, did anyone lose a shaded spot? It's right over here.

>He sat on the grass with his back against the trunk of the tree,playing the 
>harmonica.To Mimi,it was a beautiful sound.

TOM: As previously mentioned, audio agony to everyone else.

>Not that she listened to the harmonica at home on her stereo but,

MIKE: Once in a while she would break out her Toots Thielemans album and 
rock
out.

>if Matt was playing it,she could listen for an eternity.

CROW: Or what seemed like an eternity.

>Mimi hid behind the tree,secretly watching Matt play.

TOM: Through the tree?

>He wasn't playing a song she recognised so,she assumed that Matt was just 
>playing something off the top of his head,

MIKE: "Unkempt Blonde Rag."

>letting the melody flow.Soon enough,Matt stopped playing and Mimi clapped 
>her hands to show that she enjoyed the private concert.

CROW (Mimi): You stopped! Thank you!

>Matt turned around and looked at Mimi surprised.

MIKE (Matt): Hey, you can see right through this tree!


>"Mimi!" He exclaimed. "How long have you been there?"

CROW (Mimi): Long enough for my ears to bleed.

TOM (Matt): Fifteen seconds, huh?


>Mimi giggled and sat down next to him,smiling.

MIKE (Mimi): Hee hee! I like you, can you tell?


>"A long time.Did you know that you can hear your harmonica around the 
>entire field?"

CROW (Matt): Yeah, everybody's rolling on the ground, moaning in pain....


>"It can't be that loud!" He said,laughing.

TOM (Matt): I don't even have the amp plugged in.


>"Matt,why the harmonica?" Mimi asked.


>"What do you mean?" Matt said,looking at Mimi who was looking back up at 
>him.

MIKE (Matt): I thought you knew. The author said you did....


>"Why don't you play a different instrument?"

TOM (Mimi): Something that requires musical talent, maybe?


>Matt was silent for a moment before answering Mimi.


>"I guess once I started playing it,I couldn't stop."

MIKE (Matt): It was cold that day and my lips froze to the harmonica.

>He replied,as a different sound to Matt's harmonica was heard.A bell.

CROW: Wow, he's good at that thing. Maybe he can get his harmonica to make 
siren
noises, too.

>The School bell,signifying that it was time to return to their lessons.Mimi 
>and Matt stood up and walked to class together.

TOM (Mimi): So, are you going to answer my question? Are you even listening?
Hello?

>***

>'If A=4 and B=2.3,what does C represent?'

CROW: A passing grade.


>Mimi sat at her desk,tapping her pen on it.

TOM (Mimi): Maybe Matt will like me if I accompany him on drums.

>She looked at the question before her eyes,she was sure that she knew the 
>answer.

MIKE: It was blowin' in the wind.

>But,she couldn't concentrate on her work today.It was as if something else 
>was on her mind.

CROW (Mimi): "Unkempt Blonde Rag" has been playing in my head for the past 
three
days! I'm going insane!

>It was almost as if something was missing from the lesson.

TOM: Like any information relevant to C.

>She looked up from her text book.Same teacher.Same homework on the board 
>behind him.

CROW: This class is an easy A if he never changes the homework assignment.

MIKE (Teacher): For tomorrow, class, xerox what you turned in today.

>She looked back down at her desk.Same pink furry pencilcase.

TOM and CROW: Dead ant, dead ant, dead ant dead ant dead ant dead ant dead 
ant!
Dead dead dead dead ant.

MIKE: Ah, yes, the theme from "The Pink Panther." Nice singing, guys!

>Same messages on the desk.

MIKE: "Your dentist called, he wants to reschedule your appointment."

TOM: "Pick up milk and sugar on the way home."

CROW: "You want it when?!"

>She looked at the wall next to where she sat.Same Detention list.

TOM: At least we're not watching that show.

MIKE: Or "Recess," either. Not that they can be told apart....

>Same posters for last year's Prom Night still pinned up.

CROW: Pin-up posters in school? I think I want my equivalency.


>Mimi held her forehead.Was she going crazy?

TOM: Or was she there already?

>Why did she feel so different? Why did she feel like something was 
>different today?

CROW: We secretly replaced Mimi with Folger's Crystals.

>She looked back at the question.


>'If A=4 and B=2.3,what does C represent?'

MIKE: Carbon.


>Mimi just stared at the question for a whole minute.

CROW (Mimi): This is a joke, right? I mean, what A and B are is totally
irrelevant to C.


>'If A=4 and B=2.3,what does C represent?'

TOM: Nope, it didn't change. Same dumb question.


>"Damn it! What's wrong with me?" Mimi screamed at the top of her 
>voice,forgetting that she was in a Classroom.

CROW: Why is "Classroom" capitalized?

>A Classroom in which the teacher insisted on silent work and no screaming 
>whatsoever.

MIKE: As opposed to those Classrooms where you can jump up and down and 
yell.

>The teacher looked up at Mimi.Mimi looked around the room with only her 
>eyes,

TOM: None of the other students would let her use theirs.

>everyone was looking at her as if she was a fish in a tank.

CROW: So, they were gonna cut her up for sushi?

MIKE (Mimi): Stop staring at me or I'm going to hide in my miniature castle!


>"Ms.Tachikawa?" The teacher spoke in a monotonous tone.

MIKE (Ben Stein): Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

>"Is something wrong?"

CROW (Teacher): Or are you cussing in my Classroom for the sheer joy of it?

>"No...Well,yes but it's...Can I please be excused,sir?" Mimi 
>asked,nervously stuttering.

TOM (Teacher): Why? Did you burp?

MIKE: She didn't stutter in that sentence. Stammer, yeah, but not stutter.

>Was she going insane?

CROW: Or was she there already?

TOM: I said that.

CROW: Oops! Sorry.

>The teacher certainly looked at her as if she was.

MIKE (Teacher): I knew the pink obsession was a bad sign.


>"Very well.Be quick." He said before going back to ticking names off of a 
>register.

MIKE: He should have called roll before starting class.

TOM: What happened to "If A=4 and B=2.3,what does C represent?" Are we never
going to get the answer?

CROW: It's in the back of the book, Tom.

TOM: Let me see. "C=(x² + 2xy + y²)." That told me nothing.


>Mimi quickly walked out of the Classroom,ignoring the sniggers of the other 
>students.

TOM: For once, sniggers didn't satisfy.

>She opened the door and slammed it quickly before sinking to the floor 
>outside.

MIKE: Then the teacher poked his head out and suggested she not slam the 
door
and stop making so much noise.

CROW: Yeah, it was almost as aggravating as the sound of a harmonica.

>***

>Mimi was soon in the girls' washroom.She filled up a sink full of cold 
>water,glaring at her reflection in the mirror.

MIKE (Mimi): Don't get smart with me, me!

TOM: Me, me...Mimi! I get it! Ha, ha! Ahem.

>Her face was red but,she didn't know if it was caused by embarassment or 
>exhaustion.

CROW: Or maybe just sunburn.

>She removed her large pink cowgirl hat

MIKE: You know, the one she lost at the end of the first season?

TOM and CROW: D'OH!

>and splashed the water on her face a few times.


>'What could have been missing?' She wondered,doubting her own sanity.

TOM (Mimi): I carried the remainder and I still couldn't solve for C.

>She reached for a towel and dried her face.

CROW: With her shirttail.

>She looked around the room.More writings on the wall.

TOM: "Here I sit, broken-hearted...."

MIKE: No, Tom.

>Not surprisingly,most of them were kind,sweet comments about Matt.

CROW: Like, "He's not really that ugly or obnoxious."

>There were even a couple about Tai but,mainly it was Matt.

MIKE: Damn it, fanfic, stop doing that! Words like "but," "and," and "so," 
go
after the comma, not before!

>Her eyes caught sight of a piece of paper that was stuck to the wall.

TOM (Mimi): Gross! You're supposed to stick used gum under the sink, not to 
the
wall!

>On it was a list of names.

CROW: She hasn't even dated him, and she's picking out baby names.

>It resembled the list of names for Cheerleader try-outs.But,at the top,it 
>read:

MIKE: "Petition to have all cheerleaders deported."


>'SIGN YOUR NAME HERE IF YOU THINK MATT ISHIDA IS CUTE.'

CROW: So we'll know who you are and can have you tranquilized.


>Mimi smiled.

TOM (Mimi): I can't believe Joe came in here and signed this!

>The list of names was huge,at this rate,they'd need another piece of paper.

CROW: Not if they're running their sentences together the way this fanfic 
does.

>Mimi wondered if Matt realised how popular he was.There was a blue 
>ballpoint pen on the ground.Mimi bent down,picked it up and signed her 
>name.

MIKE: Ick! Don't touch stuff that's been on the floor of a public restroom!


>"Number 58:Mimi Tachikawa." She read out.58 girls loved Matt.

CROW: "Number 1: Mimi Tachikawa. Number 2: Mimi Tachikawa. Number 3: Mimi
Tachikawa." Hmmm. I sense a pattern.

>But,Mimi doubted that they loved him as much as she did.Mimi stood at the 
>sink,staring into the mirror and imagining that Matt had to pick a girl to 
>go out with off of the list.

MIKE (Matt): Bachelorette Number 58, what makes you different from the 
others?

CROW (Mimi): I love you more than they do!

MIKE (Matt): Well, that's enough for me! Let's go salsa dancing!

>Oh,how great it would be if he chose her! She'd be the envy of those 58 
>girls who signed the list!

TOM: Uh, fifty-seven. You're fifty-eight, Mimi.

>The benefits of love were endless!

MIKE: Love makes a great tax shelter!


>Mimi awoke from her daydream and left the Washroom.

CROW (Schoolgirl): Hey, let the water out of the sink when you're done!

>As she walked back along the corridor to her Mathematics class,

MIKE: Mimi checked her cheat sheet so she'd get at least one answer right.

>she passed the Principal's Office.She stopped dead in her tracks when,out 
>of the corner of her eye,she saw

TOM: Jimmy Hoffa!

>Matt with his parents talking to the Principal! Why was Matt talking to the 
>Principal?

CROW: 'Cause if you only make faces at him, you get expelled.

>Why were his parents there? Why were BOTH his parents there TOGETHER?

MIKE: Why were BOTH of the TWO of his parents there together at the same 
time
with each other present?

>They had split up,hadn't they?

CROW: It's a reunion tour.

TOM: Yeah, they're opening for Jimmy Page.

>What was going on? Then,it dawned on her.Matt wasn't in Mathematics,THAT 
>was what was missing! Matt hadn't gone to the lesson!

MIKE: She's so in love with Matt, she doesn't notice when he's not in class?

>But,that didn't explain why him and his parents were talking in the 
>Principal's Office!

TOM (Principal): Son, I understand you've been cutting math class.

MIKE (Matt): Uh-oh!

CROW: I guess that DOES explain why they're talking to the principal.

>Was Matt in trouble?

CROW: AGAIN?

MIKE: TODAY?


>Mimi felt another headache coming on and walked back to the girls' 
>washroom,bewildered.

TOM: When did she have the first headache? I don't remember it.

>***

>Mimi collapsed on her bed,face first into the pillow.

CROW: They have beds in math class? AND pin-up posters? Is this Xaviera
Hollander High?

>It had been a very exhausting day due to 2 things-

TOM: Beans and cabbage.


>1) Her temporary fling with insanity during her Mathematics class.

MIKE: That was temporary? Sounded like standard Mimi to me.


>And more confusingly-


>2) The mystery surrounding Matt's appearance in the Principal's Office with 
>BOTH his parents.

TOM: Geez, knock over a liquor store and the principal wants to talk to both
your 'rents.


>She turned onto her back and looked up at the ceiling.

CROW (Mimi): There's my pencils!

>Matt didn't walk home with her and the others after School...

MIKE: He was taken directly to jail.

>***

>"We can't wait any longer!" Shouted Tai.

MIKE (Tai): We want service and we want it NOW!

>He was tired of waiting for Matt to show up.He looked at his watch.

TOM (Tai): I love how Mickey grabs his crotch at 6:30!

>"At this rate,it's gonna be too dark to even play soccer!"

CROW: Go, darkness!


>"I don't understand why Matt would leave without us.It's not like him at 
>all." Said Sora,wondering where he could be.

MIKE (Sora): He's such a people person. That's why he's always wandering off
alone.

>Tai looked down at his little sister,Kari.

CROW (Sora): So you're not speaking to me at all, huh?


>"Kari,you didn't happen to see if Matt was with TK after School?"

TOM (Kari): Ask TK. He's right over there.


>"No,Tai." Kari replied,in a quiet voice. "TK was picked up by his parents 
>but,Matt wasn't with them."

MIKE (Kari): He was taken away in a paddy wagon.


>"Hang on,Matt's parents don't live together!" Joe exclaimed.

CROW: Yeah, we know. That doesn't mean they can't appear in the same place 
at
the same time. They're not Batman and Bruce Wayne.


>"Perplexing." Izzy said. "Matt's parents both picked up TK but,Matt wasn't 
>with them.This is just one large mystery."

TOM: I bet the old guy who owns the abandoned amusement park did it.


>"Well,I'm not waiting around to solve any mystery that's gonna take all 
>night!

MIKE: Well, this one only takes five minutes. Call his house!

>Come on,guys!" Tai ordered.All of them followed him.


>Except for Mimi.

TOM (Mimi): Nag, nag, nag. Do we always have to do what you want, Tai?


>"Mimi!" Tai shouted at her. "Are you coming or not?"

CROW: This isn't a porno fanfic so far, so I'm guessing, "No."


>Mimi didn't reply.She just stood on the sidewalk,silent as a ghost.

MIKE: Moaning, rattling chains....


>"I'll go and talk to her.You guys go on." Sora told the others who walked 
>on,leaving her to confront an un-characteristily solemn Mimi Tachikawa.

TOM (Sora): Whew! Thanks for helping me get away from Bossy-boots. And he
wonders why Matt didn't show....


>"What's up,Mimi?" Sora asked,looking at her friend.

MIKE (Mimi): I'm hunting wabbits, heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh!


>"Sora...I saw Matt in the Principal's Office today."

CROW (Sora): There are friendlier places to meet your boyfriend, you 
know....


>Sora's face switched to an expression of concern.

MIKE: Up till now, she hadn't been worried about the missing boy or the
depressed girl.

>Okay,so Matt could be a bit of a rebel but,not to the point where he'd have 
>to go and see the Principal!

TOM: He defies authority, just not to its face.


>"Mimi,have you any idea why he was in there?"

CROW: Probably about why he was putting up a sign-up sheet in the girls'
bathroom.


>"No.All I know is that he was in there with his Mum and Dad and they were 
>talking to the Principal about something."

TOM (Mimi): It sounded like the principal was helping them pick out 
wallpaper
for Matt's room.


>"It just doesn't seem like Matt to break School rules.

MIKE (Sora): Sure, he's whacked a few people, but he never runs in the halls 
or
chews gum in class.

>I mean,he doesn't like being bossed around much but,if he's been in there 
>then,something big must've happened!"

TOM (Principal): Son, I know how you hate to be bossed around, but do you 
think
filling my car with dog poop was really necessary?


>"Sora?" Mimi looked up at the girl who was smiling back at her.

CROW (Sora): Ha, ha! Matt's in trouble!

>A tear ran down her cheek and she put her arms around Sora,crying with 
>fear.

MIKE: Sora's crying with fear? A second ago she was smiling!


>"I'm worried about Matt."

TOM (Mimi): We had this real important test today in Math and he missed it! 
He's
gonna flunk!

>***

>Mimi had her head in her pillow.

MIKE: The feathers tickled her nose and she sneezed.

>She cried floods of tears,soaking the fabric.

CROW: Kind of a desperate ploy to hide eneuresis.

>She was so scared for him.She usually felt kind of stupid crying over the 
>problems of someone else but,

TOM: She felt stupid most of the time anyway, so who cares?

>Matt wasn't just someone.


>Matt was the light of Mimi's life

CROW (Debbie Boone): He lit up her life....

MIKE: Stop.

>and if something had hurt him then,it hurt her too.

TOM (Mimi): Ouch, my foot! Watch where you walk, Matt!


>Suddenly,Mimi's phone rang loudly,blocking out the sounds of her cries.

MIKE: Good. The sound of her cries hurts almost as much the sound of a
harmonica.

>Mimi dried her eyes,sniffled and picked up the phone.It was Sora.

TOM (Mimi): Clear the line, Matt might call!


>"Mimi,we're all over the park playing soccer and I was wondering if you 
>wanted to join in?"

CROW (Sora): Just because you've never liked sports before doesn't mean you
won't this time.


>Mimi smiled.Sora was a friend you only find once in a lifetime.

TOM: And blow off, little realizing this was the one worth keeping.

>Maybe a quick game would help her take her mind off of things.Mimi 
>replied,agreeing to participate.

MIKE (Mimi): I agree to participate.

>Quickly,she took off her cowgirl clothes and put on some clothes more 
>suited for playing soccer.

CROW: A snorkel and a tutu.

>Not her best clothes though,she hated playing in mud as it is.The last 
>thing she needed was getting her best clothes totally ruined and dirty.

TOM: Whew! For a minute I thought she was going to ruin her good clothes.

>She tied her hair back,grabbed her shoes and darted out of the door to the 
>park.

CROW (Mimi): Oops! Forgot to put my shoes on!

>***

>When Mimi got there,she was greeted by Sora but,she was more interested in 
>seeing if Matt was present amongst her friends.

MIKE (Sora): Yeah, yeah, just ignore Sora. Sora's not important. Sora 
doesn't
have feelings.


>He wasn't.Matt was not playing.

CROW: He probably wasn't playing because he wasn't there.

>Just then,Mimi saw someone who may help her find him.

TOM: Sherlock Holmes arrives.


>TK,Matt's younger brother,was sitting on the swings nearby with Kari with 
>an ice cream in his hand.

MIKE (Kari): You might want to put that in a bowl. It's leaking through your
fingers and everything.

>But,it wasn't the normal TK.

CROW: He wasn't having a bawling fit.

>He wasn't happily talking and laughing with Kari like he usually does.

TOM: Wait. This is TK, right?

>Instead,he was just sitting there on a swing looking extremely sad.Maybe TK 
>knew where Matt was and why he was with his parents earlier.

MIKE: But then, TK didn't know what his own initials stood for, so it wasn't
like he was a font of information.

>Mimi walked over to the swings and perched herself next to Matt's little 
>sibling.

CROW (Mimi): AWWWWK! Pretty bird! Mimi want a cracker!


>"TK?" Mimi spoke in hush tones.

TOM: "Hush tones?" Are they anything like hushpuppies?

>TK looked up and attempted a smile but,it wasn't a good,cheerful one like 
>he usually has.

MIKE: He's been buying factory-second smiles again.


>"Yes,Mimi?"

CROW (TK): You're going to make me cry, aren't you?


>"Erm...You wouldn't happen to know where Matt is,would you?"


>That one question transformed TK's slight smile into a crumpled frown 
>followed by large expression of sadness.

MIKE: Way to go, Barbara Walters. Why don't you ask him what kind of tree he 
is
while you're at it?

>His chin began to shake,tears wellied up in his eyes

TOM: "Wellied?" They've got on little galoshes?

>and soon enough,he leaped from the swing and grabbed onto Mimi,tears 
>running down his face.

MIKE (Mimi): Stop, you're getting ice cream all over me!

CROW: Well, at least TK's back to normal....


>All the others,Tai,Sora,Joe and Izzy,stopped their match and ran over to 
>see what was going on.

CROW (Tai): Hey, TK's crying. Maybe Matt came back!

>Kari jumped down from her swing and put an arm around TK.

TOM: And she's got him in a sleeper hold! She's going for the takedown!


>"TK?" Kari looked at the crying TK.

MIKE (Mimi): Could you bawl on Kari instead? I don't want your snot on my
clothes.


>"Matt..." TK began,between tears. "...I didn't see him after School today! 
>He's gone away and I don't know where!"

CROW (TK): And he's got my lunch money!


>All of them were surprised.

MIKE: They figured TK would be only too glad to be rid of Ol' Sleeveless. 
All of
them were.

>Matt would never leave TK alone.

CROW: He was always pestering the littler kid.

TOM (TK): Ow-w-w-w! Stop it or I'll tell!

>But,both their parents picked TK up from School.

MIKE: Yes, fanfic, that's been established....


>"TK,why did both your Mum and Dad pick you up today?" Mimi asked.

TOM: I smell Britain.

MIKE (TK): We were going to price cricket bats and then out for fish and 
chips.


>It was a question that had buzzed around everyone's heads.Mimi's in 
>particular.

CROW: No, wait, that's a mosquito. Oh, good, Sora swatted it.


>"They'd had to see Matt's Principal and they just thought it'd be easier to 
>take me home together but,

TOM (TK): They figured Matt could get home okay without them.

>they didn't speak to each other at all."

MIKE: Does it strike anyone as odd that Matt disappears and his parents 
aren't
looking for him or talking to the police or even particularly concerned?

CROW: Nope.


>"Didn't they say why Matt had to see the Principal?" Sora asked before Mimi 
>had a chance to.

CROW (Mimi): Hey, I'M the one obsessed with Matt. Butt out!


>"No,they didn't." TK replied,sniffling.Then,a sound was heard.A sound that 
>everyone recognised.But,not everyone liked.

TOM: Oh, God, Shonen Knife!


>Mimi on the other hand,loved the sound.

CROW: No, it can't be Shonen Knife. Nobody likes them.


>It was a harmonica! Matt must me somewhere around here!

MIKE: Matt, stop musting me!


>Quickly,they all tried to hear where the melody was coming from.It sounded 
>like it was coming from a line of trees on the other side of the park.

TOM: Matt's renting out from the Lorax.

>They all ran across and sure enough,they saw Matt sitting down,back against 
>a tree,playing his instrument of choice.

MIKE: How'd he plug in a Hammond organ in the woods?

>Tai shouted out to him.


>"Hey,Matt!"

CROW (Tai): Stop! Harmonicas are evil!


>Matt stopped playing abruptly.

MIKE (Matt): I'm sorry, I'll be quiet.

>He turned to see everyone watching him,eyes wide open like there was 
>something wrong with him.

CROW: Let's see: stupid hair, no sleeves, moody-broody 'tude, ran off from
parents, always stuck with TK, likes the harmonica...there's plenty wrong 
with
him.

TOM: Bambi eyes aren't going to save you, kid.

>Quickly,he stood up and ran deeper into the line of trees.

MIKE: He ran deeper into a line? How? It's 2D!

>Mimi was quick to follow him.She had been worrying herself sick over him 
>and she was going to find out what was going on!

CROW (Marvin Gaye): Brother, brother, brother....

>Soon enough,Matt stopped as did Mimi who was completely out of breath.


>"Matt,what's wrong with you? Why did you run away?" Mimi asked,desperate to 
>know.

TOM: Completely out of breath, she asked in sign language.

>Was it her? Had she done something wrong? But,what had she done to get Matt 
>in trouble at School?

MIKE (Mimi): Oops. I guess I shouldn't have used your log-in to send that 
death
threat e-mail to the PE teacher. Sorry!


>"Just...leave me alone,Mimi!" Matt shouted,with his back to Mimi.

CROW (Matt): I'm tired of you stalking me!


>Mimi was very surprised.Matt had never talked to her like this before.

TOM: Or if he had, she had ignored it.

>Just then,the others arrived and Matt turned around to face them all with 
>fire in his eyes.

MIKE: A little Murine will clear that up.


>"Can't I just be on my own without you guys for one night?" Matt shouted 
>again.

CROW (Matt): You always hog the covers!

>This time everyone was shocked,especially TK and Mimi.

MIKE: TK and Mimi were in the bad habit of dragging their feet across the
carpet.


>"Matt..." Mimi began,walking up to Matt.

TOM (Mimi): What's with the Greta Garbo act?


>"I SAID,LEAVE ME ALONE!" Matt screamed.

TOM (Helen Reddy): Leave me alone, please leave me alone, won't you leave me
alone, oh, leave me alone....

>As he did,he pushed Mimi over hard.

CROW: TIM-BER-R-R-R-R!

>So hard,she fell backwards into the mud.

MIKE: This is NOT how you do the Nestea Plunge.

TOM: But it didn't matter much that she fell in the mud, as she was wearing 
old
clothes.

CROW: I'm so glad the fanfic established that. I'd have been worried about 
her
clothes otherwise.

>That shocked everyone even more.Matt wasn't the type of guy who would push 
>a girl over!

MIKE: Usually he coldcocks girls.

>Sure enough,he ran off again into the darkness as rain began to fall.

CROW: Washing off the mud, so it's not all bad.

>Mimi sat in the mud,totally stunned by what Matt did.

TOM (Mimi): He...he TOUCHED me! He LIKES me!

>She didn't know what to say or think.

MIKE: As usual.

>She loved Matt but,this proved that Matt didn't feel the same way.

TOM: Matt doesn't love Matt? Yeah, right.


>In Mimi's mind,it proved that Matt hated her.Slowly,Mimi stood up,burst 
>into tears and ran.

MIKE: Slowly, she ran.

>She didn't know where she was running to.She just ran.

CROW: Bouncing off trees until she got back to the field.

>Sora chased after her whilst Kari consulted a distressed TK.

MIKE (Kari): So, TK, do you think I should keep wearing my whistle, or find
something new to hang around my neck?

>Tai,Joe and Izzy didn't know what to say.

TOM: For once, their vast knowledge of soccer, allergies, and hacking failed
them.

>Tai was especially angry until he noticed something on the ground where 
>Matt was.

CROW (Tai): Look, guys. I found a bottle cap!

>He ran over and picked up the object.


>It was a harmonica.But,it wasn't Matt's,for this harmonica was bright pink.

MIKE (Tai): Okay, I think this means Matt's gay. Which one of us three is he 
in
love with and avoiding?


>"What is this?" Tai asked Joe and Izzy for their views.

CROW (Izzy): It's a HARMONICA, dimwit.

TOM (Joe): Why did we make him the leader, again?


>"Curious..." Said Izzy.

MIKE: ...George. I'd rather be reading that.


>"Why would Matt have another harmonica? A PINK harmonica?" Joe queried.

CROW (Joe): He's always preferred Holly Hobbie to Lisa Frank.


>"I don't know," Tai began. "But,there's one person who will know!"

TOM (Tai): The salesclerk at Harmonicas 'R' Us!


>And with that,Tai ran off in search of Matt.

MIKE (Izzy): So. Wanna go get a Popsicle?

CROW (Joe): Sure, why not?

>***

>"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

TOM: Who's talking?


>Matt turned around to see Tai,looking into Matt's eyes with anger.

CROW: Ten yards penalty for unnecessary comma.

>Matt had ticked him off before but,what had just transpired didn't tick him 
>off.

MIKE: Tai had been dying to shove Mimi in a mudhole from the moment he met 
her.

>It just made him sick.

TOM: So he threw up on Matt.

>There was no known reason for Matt's behaviour but,Tai was going to find 
>out reason right now.

MIKE: It's high time he had some reason.

>Slowly,he stepped a bit closer to Matt.Matt just stared at him with a cold 
>glare.

CROW (Matt): You didn't say, "Mother-may-I?" Go back to the line.


>"What're you doing here,Tai?" Matt asked,in a calm but,spine-chilling 
>voice.

TOM (Tai): You dropped your Barbie harmonica. I was just returning it.

>Tai swallowed hard.'This really freaks me out.' He told himself.

CROW (Matt): Chase me down, then build me out of the conversation. Talk to 
me,
dammit!


>"Matt,what is wrong with you?" Tai asked,loudly.

MIKE (Tai): Besides the constant moodiness and the shirt with no sleeves?

CROW (Tai): And having TK clinging to you every minute of the day?

TOM (Tai): And the inhuman urge to listen to harmonica music?


>"It's none of your business,Tai.Go and play soccer with the others."

MIKE (Matt): Or I will wish you away to the cornfield.


>Mimi had ran off.Sora had followed her.TK had ran off.

TOM: "Had run off." This clearly is not a typo.

>Kari had followed him.Izzy and Joe were running after Tai last time he saw 
>them.Tai knew that there were no others.

MIKE: Unless Izzy and Joe caught him.

>Just him and Matt.

CROW: Alone at last!

>He shook his head angrily.

TOM (Tai): Water in my ears again....


>"You're not listening to me,Matt!" Tai shouted. "You're out of control!"

CROW (Tai): Your control dipstick isn't even damp.


>"How am I 'Out of control',Tai?" Matt asked him.

TOM (Matt): I added a quart of 10-30 weight control this morning!


>"How do you think,jerk? You made your own brother upset!"

MIKE (Matt): Big deal, he's always upset. Hamsters can upset TK.


>"Do you think I INTENDED to hurt TK?

TOM (Matt): Because I can do a much better job when I try.

>Do you honestly think I wanted my parents to make that decision?"

MIKE: That you should start hurting TK on a regular basis?


>"What decision?"

CROW (Matt): They're trading me to the Seahawks for a second-round draft 
pick!


>Matt turned away and sat down.He ran his hands through his hair.

MIKE: And they got stuck in all that styling mousse.

>There was no use running away,it was time to tell Tai what was happening.


>"Earlier,I got called into the Principal's Office.I didn't know why though.

TOM (Matt): Too many options to choose from. The fights, the wedgies, the 
bad
grades, the video camera I hid in the girls' john when I put up the sign-up
sheet....

>I was shocked but,I became even more shocked when both my parents were 
>there together."

MIKE (Matt): It's the first time they've expressed concern for me
simultaneously.


>Tai sat down next to him,listening attentively.

TOM: Story time!


>"Anyway,I asked the Principal why I was called to his Office..."

CROW (Matt): And he said he couldn't get the child-proof cap off his 
Excedrins
and wanted me to open it. Ironic, huh?

>***

>"I think you'd better ask your parents that question,Matt."

MIKE (Principal): I just work here. I'm not paid to think.


>Matt turned to face his parents.

TOM (Matt): Ah, parents. We meet at last.


>"What's going on?"

CROW (Matt): Tai, Izzy, and Joe left the porno mags and beer bottles under 
my
bed the last time they were over, I swear!


>Matt's parents looked at each other then,looked back at Matt.

TOM (Mother): Honey, we just wanted to embarass you in front of all your
friends. We don't think you're angsty enough for a normal teen.


>"You must leave this School." His father told him.

MIKE (Matt): This is my punishment? If I do anything else wrong, will you 
make
me watch TV until way past my bedtime?


>Matt's heart stopped for a few seconds.

CROW: CLEAR! (Imitates defibrillator.) SHOOK-A-THOOM!


>"W...What?"

MIKE (Father): Jesus. YOU...MUST...LEAVE...THIS...SCHOOL!

TOM (Mother): We should have gotten him the more expensive hearing aid.


>"We are both moving to the Northern regions of Japan."

TOM (Matt): HOKKAIDO?! Can't you just send me to my room?


>"Both of us?"

CROW (Matt): You, me, and Mom both of us?


>"We thought that TK could see more of you if we all moved together.We won't 
>be living together but,

MIKE (Father): Your mom and I can still hate each other from across town.

>it will be easier there than here because,TK can see you whenever he 
>wants."

TOM (Matt): He sees me whenever he wants now. He follows me into the 
bathroom,
for Christ's sake.


>"But,what about my friends?"

CROW: I don't think they want to move to Hokkaido, either.


>"You can still visit them in the summer."

MIKE: Is the principal moving to Hokkaido, too? Why is he even involved in 
this?

>***

>"I don't want to leave this place,Tai." Matt told him.

TOM (Matt): So I'm moving in with the principal.


>"Well,like your folks said,you can still visit us in the summer."

CROW (Tai): Of course, we'll be on vacation someplace else....


>Matt jumped to his feet suddenly.

MIKE (Matt): Race you around the block!


>"Tai,you don't understand.It's having to be away from her!"

TOM (Tai): Dude, you don't live with your mom now. Hokkaido won't be any
different.


>Tai was really confused now.Who did Matt mean?

MIKE (Tai): Are you saying you won't miss me?


>"Who're you talking about Matt?"

CROW (Matt): Delete the apostrophe and you have your answer.

MIKE: Crow....


>Matt breathed in deeply.

TOM (Matt): Aaaaaaah-CHOO!


>"Mimi."

CROW: Screaming...Mimi!

(MIKE and TOM groan.)


>Tai was real surprised.

TOM: The pink harmonica just screams Joe.

>Matt couldn't love Mimi!

MIKE: It would distract him from loving himself.

>He'd just pushed her into the mud for crying out loud!

CROW (Matt): Mimi, stop crying out loud or I'll push you into the mud some 
more!


>"Matt,is this Mimi the same Mimi that you just gave a hard shove to?"


>"I don't know any other Mimis,do you?" Matt asked him,sarcastically.

TOM (Tai): Well, there's the one in Shop Class....


>'Matt and Mimi?' Tai thought. 'Something's still not right here...'

MIKE (Matt): Well? Do you know any other Mimis or not?

>***

>Get away.

MIKE: Um, okay. (Scoots backward in his seat.)


>He hates you.

TOM: And he is...?


>You mean nothing to him.

CROW: I think this part of the fanfic was supposed to be masked backwards.


>He has no feelings for you.

MIKE: Then he can't hate me. Make up your mind.


>He despises you.

CROW: He can tell me himself, thanks.


>Get away.

TOM: Love to, but Forrester will kill us if we leave the theater too soon.
Literally!


>Mimi,in tears,continued running.That train of thought running around her 
>brain.

TOM, MIKE, and CROW (Locomotive): CHUG-a-chug-a-CHUG-a-chug-a-CHUG-a-chug-a-
CHUG-a-chug-a! WHOO-WHOOOOO!


>Get away.

MIKE: This is familiar.


>He hates you.

CROW: Yeah, we've seen this....


>You mean nothing to him.

TOM: Uh-huh. We know.


>He has no feelings for you.

CROW: All right, already!


>He despises you.

MIKE: Cripes!


>Get away.

TOM: I hope we're not going to have to read this many more times.


>Soon enough,Mimi came to a busy road.She stood on the sidewalk.

CROW: That's what it's there for.

>Dirty,out of breath and rejected.

TOM: And that was just the sidewalk. You should have seen Mimi.


>'There's no point in going on.' Mimi's conscience told her. 'He hates you.'

MIKE: Jiminy Cricket has turned EVIL!


>'He hates you.'

TOM, MIKE, and CROW (The Beatles): Yeah, yeah, yeah!


>'He hates you.'

TOM, MIKE, and CROW (The Beatles): Yeah, yeah, yeah!


>'He hates you.'

TOM, MIKE, and CROW (The Beatles): Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!


>"He hates me!" Mimi screamed,running into the middle of the traffic.

CROW: Three hundred people on bikes? Hardly dangerous, unless you have a 
phobia
about baseball cards in spokes.

>Sora catched

TOM: "Caught."

>up with her just in time to push her out of the way of a speeding car and 
>onto the sidewalk on the other side of the road.

MIKE: Sora was run over herself and Mimi never lived down the shame.


>"Mimi,what did you think you were doing?" Sora asked her friend,still in an 
>absolute state.

TOM: Has Mimi been hittin' the vodka?


>"He...hates me,Sora."

CROW (Sora): You think you lost your love? Well, I saw him 
yesterda-ee-ay....


>"Mimi,don't say that to yourself! There's probably a really good 
>explanation for Matt's behaviour."

MIKE (Sora): Like, he's a jerk.


>"Sora...I don't know what to do..."

TOM (Sora): Look both ways before crossing a busy street....


>Sora helped Mimi up.


>"Mimi,how about I take you home?

CROW (Mimi): Okay, but I never kiss on the first date.

>You need to get some rest and besides,it's getting real late."

MIKE (Sora): You've got a full day of fretting about Matt ahead of you 
tomorrow.


>Mimi gave a weak smile and nodded her head.Sora aided Mimi as they walked 
>to her home together.

CROW: Whose home, Sora's or Mimi's?


>***One Sleepless Night Later***


>Mimi's alarm clock woke her up.

TOM: From a sleepless night?!

(MIKE, CROW, and TOM laugh hysterically.)

>It was Saturday.No School.

MIKE: Then sleep in, girl!

>Usually,Mimi would just go and hang out at the Mall or something.

CROW: Admit it. All she does Saturday is hang out at the mall.

>But,not today.She couldn't face the world today.

TOM: Two sleepless nights later....


>Slowly,she slipped into her pair of pink,fluffy slippers and pink,fluffy 
>dressing gown and made her way downstairs.

MIKE: Fashion-conscious Mimi goes for the Hostess Sno-Ball look.

>Maybe she'd feel better once she had eaten something.As she was about to 
>walk out the door,

TOM: In her bathrobe?!

>her phone rang.She stopped dead in her tracks and slowly turned around.

CROW (Mimi): Is my phone sneaking up on me?

>Who could it be? Sora,checking up on her? No,it was still early.Sora 
>wouldn't be awake yet.

MIKE: Sora knew what weekends were for.

>Tai? Why would Tai phone her?

TOM: Trying to catch her on the rebound?

>Then,she remembered something from last night.Tai had gone to find Matt! 
>Maybe he had an explanation as to why Matt pushed her into the mud!

CROW: Last night, she was sure he hated her.

TOM: Hope springs eternal. It has a good lawyer.

>She picked up the phone cautiously and answered.

MIKE (Mimi): Mimi's House of Pink, how may I help you?


>"Hello,Tai?"


>"How'd you know it was me?

TOM: It's called a plothole.

>Forget that! Mimi,I spoke to Matt last night! He's leaving the School! He's 
>moving up North!"

MIKE (Tai): He's going to become an Ainu!


>"Wha-Why?"

CROW: Wha-hey!

TOM: Hoo-wah!

MIKE (Floyd the barber): Wha-who-why-wh-wh-ah-ooooh...Andy!


>"When you saw him and his parents yesterday,they were there to tell the 
>Principal that Matt would need to go to a new School!

CROW: One that would knock some discipline into him.

>And the reason he didn't walk home with us was because he had ran out of 
>the School after his parents told him what was happening!

MIKE: You'd think the principal or the hall monitor or somebody would have
stopped him, but....

>And that's why TK didn't know where he was!"

TOM: TK is always the last to know.


>"But,why did he push me over,Tai?"

CROW (Mimi) I don't care about his problems. Does he still like me?


>"Well,it's not really for me to say,Mimi.I think that's something you 
>should ask Matt."

MIKE (Mimi): Oh, sure, and get pushed over again. You'd love that, wouldn't 
you?


>"Well,I'm asking YOU,Tai so tell me!" Mimi asked,frustrated.


>"Seriously,Mimi.I can't tell you.

CROW (Tai): It didn't make a damn bit of sense.

>I'm gonna have to go now,

TOM (Tai): My bladder's about to burst.

>I'll catch you later!"


>"No,Tai! Wai...!"

MIKE, TOM, and CROW: Tai-wai! Tai-wai! Wha-Why! Tai-wai!


>The line went dead.Mimi slowly put down the phone.

TOM (Mimi): Coward.

>A few questions had been answered but,not the one which troubled her the 
>most.

CROW: Why hot dogs come in packages of ten and hot dog buns come in packages 
of
eight.

>She was going to have to find out herself! She was going to have to 
>confront Matt!

TOM: And push him in the mud for a change.


>Today,she would get a final answer.

MIKE: NO REGIS.

CROW: No argument from us, Mike.

>***

>"So,he didn't go back to his House last night?" Kari asked TK,sitting on a 
>Park Bench.

MIKE (Kari): And your folks still aren't looking for him, and they let you 
go
outside alone? You better pray your intelligence comes from recessive genes.


>"No.He didn't even call us on the phone."

TOM (TK): He did send a singing telegram, though.


>"That just doesn't seem like Matt."

CROW: Crawl off and sulk - that sounds exactly like him.


>"He's out there somewhere Kari

TOM (TK): Beneath a clear blue sky....

>and I don't know where!" TK said,bursting into tears.Kari patted him on the 
>back a few times.

MIKE (Kari): You're going to get the hiccups if you keep crying like that.


>"It's going to be alright,TK.I'm sure Matt will come back soon." She 
>said,trying to comfort him.

CROW (Kari): Hey, TK, I picked a scab today. Wanna see me eat it?


>"But,why did he run away in the first place?"

MIKE (TK): Sure, Dad doesn't feed him, but that's a lame excuse.


>"I don't know.But,I'm sure he had a good reason."

TOM (Kari): It must have been something you did. If you're bad, brothers and
sometimes even moms and dads do that.


>"Didn't Tai say anything to you?"

CROW (Kari): "Stop touching my stuff." Don't see how that helps us with your
bro', TK.


>Kari thought back to last night.She was probably in bed asleep when Tai 
>walked in to their Apartment.

MIKE (Kari): I can't remember seeing Tai last night. Maybe he ran away, too.


>"No,TK.But,I found this by his bed this morning." Kari said,putting her 
>hand in her pocket and pulling out a pink harmonica.

TOM (TK): Tai owns a funny-colored harmonica. Yeah, that's a good reason why
Matt didn't come home, I guess.

CROW: Tai didn't give the harmonica back to Matt?!

MIKE: For Tai, it's, "Finders keepers, losers weepers."


>"That's like the instrument that Matt plays! Only it's...pink."

CROW (TK): I'd have figured Joe or Mimi for a pink harmonica, not Tai.


>"I know.Pretty cool,huh?"

TOM (Aerosmith): Yeah, PINK is my favorite color....


>"Pink's a girly colour,Kari! I'm a boy!"

MIKE (TK): I think. You're so much more masculine than I am, Kari.


>"Well,Tai's a boy too.But,he still has a pink harmonica."

CROW (Kari): Or he did until I got my hands on it.


>"But,why? Tai doesn't like the colour pink!

MIKE (TK): He flinches whenever he looks at Mimi, and she's all pink.

TOM (Kari): Uh, it's not just the color that makes him flinch....

>The only person I know who really likes pink is Mimi."

CROW (TK): And she has less musical talent than Britney Spears.


>"But,if this is Mimi's," Kari told TK, "Why has Tai got it?"

TOM (Kari): Tai's got sticky fingers....


>"This is making my head spin,Kari."

MIKE (Kari): Yeah, yeah, you're an owl. You sure forgot your brother in a
mega-hurry.


>Kari sat in deep thought.

CROW: TK sat in an anthill.

>Tai can't play an instrument to save his life,let alone a harmonica.

TOM (Kari): And the trombone? Don't get me started on the trombone! Tai is
useless on the trombone.

>She'd never seen Mimi play a harmonica.

MIKE: Heard her a few times, but never seen her play the harmonica.

>The only person she knew who played the harmonica was Matt.But,he already 
>had one and his was definately not pink.

TOM: It was a really pale, washed-out red. Almost pink....

>***

>A knocking sound was heard at the door of Tai's Apartment.

MIKE: Surprisingly, it was somebody knocking at the door.

>Tai turned away from the TV,leaped out of the couch

CROW (Tai): I can look for change later.

>and opened the door to reveal Mimi who,to her credit,looked better than she 
>did last night.

MIKE: Damn her with faint praise, why don't you?

TOM (Tai): I like the fuzzy pink bathrobe, but shouldn't you have gotten 
dressed
before coming over?


>"Where's Matt,Tai?"


>"Why do you want to know where Matt is?"

CROW (Mimi): You told me to ask him why he pushed me. I can't ask if I can't
find him.


>"I need to talk to him."

TOM (Mimi): He has my homework assignment.


>Tai looked at Mimi.She was different today than usual.

MIKE: "Different today" is enough.

>More stern,more

CROW: Limbaugh.

TOM: Imus.

MIKE: Larry King.

>determined,more...un-Mimi like.

MIKE: In other words, different. We get it.


>Quickly,Tai told Mimi where she'd find Matt hiding

TOM (Tai): Uh, out in the woods someplace....

>and with that fresh in her brain,she dashed to where he would be.

MIKE: The half-acre of Japan without buildings on it.


>It didn't take long to find him.Matt was sitting at the edge of a swamp.

CROW: Tokyo Swamp, corner of 5th and Kobayashi.

>Mimi tip-toed up behind him,still cautious.Matt was dirty,covered in mud 
>and scratches.

TOM: So, pretty much his normal self.


>'Don't tell me he spent the night here?' Mimi asked herself.

MIKE, TOM, and CROW: He didn't spend the night here.


>Slowly,she crept up on Matt.

CROW (Mimi): BOO! Ha, ha! Scared you!


>"Hello,Mimi." Matt said,turning to face her.

TOM (Matt): You make more noise than Motorhead.


>"Erm...Hi Matt." She said,nervously smiling. "I would ask,'How are 
>you?'but..."

MIKE (Mimi): After our little shoving match, I'm really not interested.


>"It's obvious,isn't it?" He told her.

MIKE (Mimi): Yup, brain-damaged.

TOM (Mimi): And self-centered.

CROW (Mimi): And mean-spirited.


>"So,is this where you've been hiding?" She asked,moving slightly closer.

MIKE (Mimi): I like what you've done with the place. Did you sew the 
curtains
yourself?


>"Yeah."


>A minute of awkward silence passed.

TOM: Y'know, this "Digimon" story might improve if there were actual Digimon 
in
it.


>"Matt,Tai told me that you were leaving.

CROW: On a jet plane.

>Is it true?"


>"No,Mimi.I'm staying here."

MIKE (Matt): Tai will make up anything to come between us.


>"But,what about TK and your parents?"

TOM (Mimi): Is it true they're leaving?


>"I don't want to leave you!"

CROW (Mimi): So you cuffed me around and hid in a sump. Oh, I'm loving this
explanation.


>Mimi couldn't believe what she had just heard.She really couldn't believe 
>it when Matt held her hand!

MIKE (Mimi): Ewwww. Have you been picking your nose?


>"Matt?" She spoke in a quiet tone as Matt smiled at her for the first time 
>in days.

TOM: So? She saw him twice in two days, and one was a passing glance in the
school hallway.


>"Mimi..." He spoke and with that,kissed her on the lips.He closed his eyes 
>but,Mimi's were wide open.

CROW (Mimi): Oh, man, your breath! Let's get you home and brush your teeth
before we make out!

>She couldn't believe what was happening!

MIKE: One minute he's all, "Get away from me!" the next it's, "Kissy, 
kissy!"

>She should push Matt away from her after how he treated her but,she 
>couldn't.This was the man she loved and now,she knew it more than ever.

TOM: Like there was any doubt in her mind before.

>She wrapped her arms tightly around Matt and covered his mouth with her's.

MIKE: She's not kissing him so much as deep-lipping him.

>Matt caressed Mimi's soft,delicate cheeks as the passion and love filled 
>the air around them.

CROW: Please, let those be her facial cheeks....


>'Why am I kissing a guy who treated me so badly?' Mimi thought to herself

TOM: Is there another kind available?

>and with that thought,she pushed Matt away gently.

CROW (Mimi): See, this is how you push people away. You don't shove 'em in 
the
mud....


>"Mimi?"

MIKE (Mimi): No, Sora. Can't you see pink?


>"I'm sorry Matt but,I can't go on with this."


>Matt looked down into the murky water at his feet.

CROW (Matt): Wow, I agree. I need a bath.


>"Because I hurt you right?"

TOM (Matt): And left?


>Slowly,Matt stood up and sighed heavily.

MIKE: Must be having an ozone alert day in Tokyo.


>"No,Matt.That's not the main reason.You're little brother's out there 
>worried sick about you.

CROW (Mimi): I've got the ice cream and snot stains to prove it.

>And here you are,being with me when you should be with him."

TOM (Matt): You could tag along and we could all be together.

MIKE (Mimi): I ain't going near TK if I can help it!


>Matt knew that Mimi was right.He'd forgotten about TK,the little guy who 
>Matt used to care so much for.

CROW: Before TK learned to talk.

>'What have I been doing?" Matt asked himself in his head.

MIKE (Matt): Oh, that's right. Spazzing out. I forgot.


>"Matt,you need to speak to TK."

TOM (Mimi): And get him to stop looking up my skirt.


>Matt nodded at her and turned to go but,stopped,walked up to Mimi and 
>kissed her on the cheek before leaving to look for TK.

CROW: Flat, dull passion ambles across the page!

>***

>"TK!" Matt shouted out across the Park.

MIKE (Matt): I got a shout-out for all my brothers! All...one of them.

>Mimi was right,he'd completely forgotten about his little brother.

CROW: Then how'd he remember his name?

>Matt thought he had a decision to make,be with his brother or with Mimi,the 
>girl he loved.


>He didn't have to make that choice.Mimi chose for him.

TOM: She's making his choices. It's like they're married already.


>"TK! Where are you,kiddo?" Matt called out.

CROW (Matt): Don't answer, don't answer, don't answer, don't answer!


>"Matt!"

CROW (Matt): Damn.


>Matt recognised that voice anywhere.

MIKE: That nerve-shattering high-pitched squeal that set every dog in the
neighborhood howling....

>He tuned around and saw TK,running to him laughing.TK was so happy to see 
>his older brother that tears were running down his face.

TOM: Seriously, we need corks for this kid's eyes.

CROW: I don't know how he got across the Digital World without dehydrating.

>Tears of joy,similar to those in Matt's eyes.The two brothers hugged each 
>other,smiling and laughing.

MIKE (TK): Tee-hee! You abandoned me! It's funny!


>"Matt,where've you been?" TK asked.

TOM (Matt): Over the rainbow! And you were there, and you, and you....


>"I just needed some time alone,TK.

CROW (Matt): Like I do every couple of episodes.

>After what our parents said..."

TOM (Matt): I can't believe they didn't find me under a cabbage leaf.


>"Our parents?" TK was puzzled.What was Matt talking about?

MIKE (TK): Don't go throwing your ten-dollar words around at me.


>"You don't know about the moving?"

CROW (Matt): You mean they didn't drag you into the principal's office in 
front
of the whole school to tell you we're moving?


>TK was even more bewildered,and it showed on his face as he looked up at 
>Matt.

TOM (TK): I guess this means I'm not leaving school. Do I have to stay here 
and
live alone?


>"What moving,Matt?"


>TK didn't know? Matt thought it would be best not to tell him.

CROW: TK was just going to wake up one day and his whole family would be 
gone to
Sapporo.

>He would leave that to the adults.

TOM: And we remember what a great job they did telling Matt....


>"Erm...Nothing,TK.Come on,I'll take you home to Mum."

MIKE (Matt): And maybe she'll make toad-in-the-hole and a trifle.


>"Thanks,Matt!" Said TK,smiling.


>TK ran ahead and Matt went to follow him when the timid voice of a little 
>girl was heard.

TOM: Oops, that's TK's voice! Kid really needs some testosterone.


>"Matt? Is this yours?"

CROW (Matt): No, the blood test came back negative....


>Matt looked down and saw Tai's younger sister,Kari holding up the pink 
>harmonica.

MIKE (Matt): Wow, you are SHORT! I almost stepped on you.


>"Where'd you find that,Kari?" Matt asked,surprised.


>"By Tai's bed."

CROW (Matt): So, Tai swings that way. Why is he muscling in on my 
girlfriend?


>Matt thought he'd just lost the pink harmonica.He had no idea that Tai 
>picked it up.He took it from Kari,thanked her and walked away,following TK.

MIKE: And after he got TK home, he paid a little visit to Tai to find out 
why he
had kept the harmonica after chasing Matt all over creation the previous 
night.

>***

>Mimi sat on a chair in her bedroom,staring into her mirror.

TOM (Mimi): I have got a face full of zits.


>'I had Matt all to myself but,I had to let him go.'

MIKE (Mimi): He was under the size limit, so I had to throw him back.


>She thought back to their short kiss earlier.

CROW: And how much Listerine it took to kill the taste.

>That brief moment sent her happiness sky rocketing beyond the stars,never 
>in her wildest dreams did she think it would feel so nice!

TOM: Her wildest dreams don't compare favorably to most slide shows.


>'After those few sweet seconds,the greatest few seconds of my life,why did 
>I turn him away? Why didn't I keep on kissing him and holding him?'

CROW (Mimi): Wait, I remember his lethal body funk. That's why.


>Mimi sighed.These past two or three days had been exhausting to say the 
>very least.

MIKE: It's a tough routine. Get up at six, drink some raw eggs, mope over 
Matt,
freak out in class, repeat....

>Not to mention confusing,what with Matt's weird behaviour and everything.

TOM: And running into traffic, and going to Tai's apartment in her bathrobe, 
and
waking up from a sleepless night, y'know, that normal stuff.

>She took a pen and her diary and began writing.


>'Dear Diary,

MIKE (Mimi): I'm leaving you for a road atlas.


>Sora phoned me earlier and told me something which made my heart sink.

TOM: Leonardo DiCaprio is gay.


>Matt is leaving tomorrow morning.

CROW: Wasn't it nice of Matt to tell her himself?


>Why so soon? I probably won't even get to say goodbye properly.

MIKE (Mimi): I have band practice until after he leaves.

>The passion we shared earlier was great and all but,I didn't get to tell 
>him how I really felt because,I knew that there was another person who 
>loved him and it was urgent that Matt spoke to him.

TOM: This may be the longest sentence ever run-on.

>Yes Diary,I'm talking about TK.

CROW: Anyone else think it was Joe?

TOM: Yup.

>I pictured in my head how upsetting it must be for TK when him and Matt are 
>apart,

MIKE (Mimi): Since Matt's the only one who'll tolerate his whining.

>they hardly ever see each other.When they move,they'll apparantly get to 
>see more of one another.

TOM: Like they aren't joined at the hip now.

CROW: The only way Matt and TK could see more of each other is if they were
stapled to the inside of each other's eyelids.


>People have often thought of me as stubborn but,I gave up the greatest 
>thrill of my life with the guy I love most,just so that he could be with 
>his little brother.

TOM: Did she have a choice? Can twelve-year-olds really move into a treefort
full-time and survive?


>Do these seem like the actions of a stubborn girl,Diary?

MIKE (Mimi): Huh, Diary? You gonna answer? Got nothing to say? Up yours, 
Diary.


>But still,stubborn or not,I will never again have an opportunity to be with 
>Matt like that ever again.

CROW (Mimi): We'll have to suck face someplace other than a swamp.

>Sure,he might come down for Summer or something but,it'll only be for a 
>couple of days at the most and he'll be too busy doing other stuff.

MIKE: Summer only lasts a couple of days?

CROW: Well, this is a Hokkaido summer.


>I guess it was just not meant to be.

TOM: Like New Coke and the XFL.


>Yours,


>Mimi Tachikawa.

MIKE: The Goddess of Pink.


>-x-'

CROW: She kissed her own diary.


>As Mimi closed and locked her pink diary,a lump came to her throat.

TOM (Mimi): Damn goiter. I better eat some iodized salt.


>'What was I thinking?' She told herself,angrily. 'I could have had Matt for 
>myself!

MIKE (Mimi): I could have cornered the Matt market!

>But no,Mimi! You let him get away! And now,you'll never get another chance 
>again!'

CROW: You've still got a shot at Community Chest, though.


>She ran to her bed and,in a fit of rage,threw her stuffed animals at her 
>wall,one by one!

TOM: Oooh, she's throwing toys! How rebellious!

>She picked up something else to throw but,this didn't feel like a soft 
>toy.Mimi paused and looked at it.

MIKE (Mimi): How did I get a hard toy mixed in with my soft toys?


>It was a photo of Matt.He was looking at the camera,smiling in that cool 
>way which melted any girl's heart like butter.

CROW: Except Sora. She's immune.

>Mimi was soon sobbing over the picture,her only memory of the man she 
>loves.

MIKE (Mimi): Who is this guy in the photo? I should remember....


>Suddenly,her mother called up to her.

CROW (Mother): Stop making all that racket!


>"Mimi,there's a boy to see you!"

TOM (Mimi): Does he have a name?

CROW (Mother): Uh, I don't know.


>Mimi dried her eyes and said in a weak voice:


>"Can you send him up to my room?"

MIKE (Mimi): And a grilled cheese sandwich, too? I'm hungry.



>She heard the guy's feet march up the stairs.It was probably just Tai with 
>an update on the Matt situation.

CROW (Tai): Yup, he's still moving, all right!

>Her door opened and she gasped as Matt stood before her,holding a 
>gift-wrapped object.

TOM (Matt): Hi, could you give me this housewarming present?

>***

>Mimi stood completely still,her lips sealed.

MIKE (Mimi): Mmm, Mmmmph! Mmmph mmph mm mmm mmmmph!

>Matt just stood at the door to her Bedroom,holding the object covered in 
>pink and yellow wrapping paper.

CROW: We did change scenes, right? 'Cause this sounds just like the last 
scene
to me.

>She didn't know what to say or do.

MIKE: As usual.


>'You and Matt are alone Mimi,you klutz!' She thought to herself. 'Say 
>something romantic!'

TOM (Mimi): Welcome, Matt!

(MIKE groans.)

CROW: You've waited a long time to say that, Servo.

TOM: Sorry. Couldn't hold it in any longer.


>"H...Hey,Matt." She stuttered. 'Very romantic,Mimi...NOT!'

MIKE (Matt): If you're going to talk like that, then, SCHWING!


>"Hi." Matt replied.And then...


>Nothing.

CROW: And the fanfic grinds to a complete halt.

>Not a word was said for a whole three minutes.Both Matt and Mimi hadn't the 
>slightest idea what to say to each other.

TOM (Matt): So...how 'bout them Carp?

>The past few days had been so full of mystery and,quite frankly,weird 
>things had been going on.

MIKE: Quite frankly, boring things had been going on.

>Finally,Matt spoke up.


>"Can I come in?" Matt asked.Mimi looked at Matt,positioned at the entrance 
>to her room.

CROW (Mimi): Hey, Mom, I'm going to be alone in my room with a boy and the
door's going to be closed, okay?

MIKE (Mom): That's fine, dear.


>"Yeah,sure,if you want to." Mimi replied.

TOM (Mimi): Whatever, Mr. Needy.

>If she was in this situation a fortnight ago,she would have wrapped her 
>arms around Matt and kissed him(So long as the others weren't present).

MIKE: The others aren't present in this situation anyway.

>But,since then,things were very different.This week,Matt had shouted at 
>her,pushed her into mud and confused her like never before.

TOM: I felt like the mud thing was different, but as for the rest....

>But,at the same time,that kiss they shared earlier...It had that certain 
>magic Mimi had always associated with her dreams of being close to Matt.

CROW: Like most magic, badly staged and needing assitance from the audience 
to
work.


>Matt stepped into the room and sat on the bed.Mimi sat down next to him.

MIKE (Mimi): You, uh, did go back home, right?


>Again,the next few minutes were silent.To Matt,it was peaceful.

TOM (Matt): It's so nice to be with Mimi when she's not talking.


>To Mimi,it was creepy.

CROW (Mimi): I love you, but do you have to come near me?


>"Matt? That kiss..."


>"It was wrong,I know." Matt butted in,before Mimi could finish her 
>sentence.

MIKE (Mimi): Can I finish my thought, please? Thanks.


>"No,it's not that,it's...well...why did you kiss me,Matt?"

TOM (Mimi): What does this "kiss" mean, Earthling?


>"Because,I love you Mimi."


>Okay,now Mimi was more bewildered than she was when Izzy spoke to her in 
>computer jargon.

CROW: But at least she didn't have to hear about .dll files.


>"Matt,you don't push over someone you love,and you really shouldn't hide 
>something from them."

TOM (Matt): Oh. Well, then, I guess I don't love you. Happy?


>"You mean the fact that I'm leaving?"

CROW (Matt): Or that I'm the one who put the Ex-Lax in your bento?


>Mimi's heart sank.

TOM: She's got icebergs in her chest.

>Every time she heard something in connection with Matt leaving,she felt 
>like crying and begging him not to go.


>"Matt...I don't want you to leave..."

MIKE: Phase 1 complete. Now, on to the crying.


>"I was hoping you'd say something like that."

CROW (Matt): Do you mind if I crash here for a few months?


>"Wha-?"

MIKE, TOM, and CROW: Wha-why! Tai-wai!


>"Mimi,all I really want to do is be with you."


>Matt placed his hand on Mimi's and held onto it tightly,as if should he let 
>go,they would drift apart and never see each other again.

CROW: Which is what's going to happen.

>He was holding on to Mimi as if she were his life-line.

MIKE: I said, NO REGIS.

TOM: You're the one with the Regis obsession!

>Smiling,Mimi put her hand on Matt's.

CROW: And pried his hand off. He was cutting off her circulation.


>"And all I want to do is be with you Matt but,I need a few things 
>explaining to me."

MIKE: Things don't explain to you, people do.


>"Like what?"


>"Like why you pushed me into the mud? Do you know how long I was in the 
>shower trying to get it out of my hair?"

CROW (Mimi): I tried to wash that man right out of my hair! And failed.


>Matt laughed.

TOM (Matt): Forty-three minutes exactly. Do you know I watched throught the
window the entire time?

>Mimi didn't share his amusement.


>"It's not funny,Matt! You got my clothes dirty too!"

MIKE (Mimi): I had to do my laundry on account of you!


>Matt had been laughing so much that he had to wipe a tear away from his eye 
>before speaking seriously.

CROW: He's been taking lessons from TK. Any emotion improves with tears.


>"I was scared."

TOM (Matt): I have this natural fear of stalkers.


>"Of what?" Mimi asked.Matt stood up and stared out of Mimi's Bedroom 
>window.

MIKE (Matt): Hey, somebody's changing clothes across the street with the 
blinds
up!


>"I didn't know how to tell you I was leaving.

CROW (Matt): I couldn't decide between an anonymous note or an anonymous 
phone
call.

>I never told you or anyone until now but,I've always liked you,Mimi.Not 
>just as a friend but,as...you know...

TOM (Matt): An enemy.

>someone special.I figured that if I didn't tell you or anyone,TK would tell 
>you all instead." Matt laughed slightly.

CROW (Matt): But as I said, I never told anyone, so even TK didn't know. My
plans bite.

>"I was relying on a little kid,Mimi.I was so stubborn.Then,I had another 
>idea."

MIKE (Matt): I could have Gabumon tell you. He's more reliable than TK.


>"What idea,Matt?"

TOM (Mimi): You had an idea?


>Matt turned his head to face Mimi.

CROW: And coughed.

MIKE (Matt): Ouch! That smarts!


>"I would run away from home and stay here.

MIKE (Matt): Get me five acres, maybe raise me some rabbits.

>That's why I didn't go home at night,I slept in the woods and played my 
>harmonica.

TOM (Matt): Had to do something to make sure no one came near me.

>I didn't know I'd get everyone so frightened and concerned."

CROW (Matt): That I might come back.


>"You did have us all worried.Especially TK."

MIKE: He's on a saline drip right now to replace all the body fluid he lost
bawling.


>"When I went to see TK after we kissed," Matt continued, "I realised what 
>an idiot I'd been and that I should have just told you all like a man.But,I 
>didn't.I was a coward."

CROW: Sounds like he just said only women are cowards.


>Mimi stood up and walked over to Matt,putting her arm around him.She knew 
>now that Matt never really intended to hurt her,TK or anyone.

MIKE: He came by his boorishness naturally.

>He'd never known Matt to be so sensitive.

TOM: And this "he" is TK, I guess.


>"Matt,we all would have understood if you'd told us you had to leave."

CROW (Mimi): Of course, I still would have had a massive cow, but I'd have
understood.


>"Really?" Matt asked her,looking into her eyes that held a sparkle he had 
>never seen in the eyes of another girl before.

MIKE: It's called "glaucoma."

TOM: "Another girl?" Did we just learn something about Matt?


>"Of course.But,all us girls would miss you at School."

CROW (Mimi): It's so easy to copy off your papers.


>"What?" Matt was surprised.He always knew he was popular with a few girls 
>but,ALL the girls?

MIKE (Matt): If all the girls like me, why do so many of them slap me and 
tell
me to piss off?


>"Well,apart from Sora who prefers Tai."

TOM: Then, not all the girls.


>"Every girl besides Sora has a crush on me?"

MIKE (Matt): What's up with Sora? Is there something wrong with her?


>"Didn't you know about the poll in the Girls' Washroom?"

TOM (Matt): Yeah, Joe told me about that. Where did he hear about it?


>Matt had heard rumours that the girls had pieces of paper stuck to the 
>walls of their Washrooms for girls to sign if they liked a specific guy.

MIKE: Which he had always dismissed, because it sounds so whacked out.

>Of course,none of the boys ever dared prove the rumour because...well,it's 
>the Girls' Washrooms!

CROW: He's obviously never seen "Revenge of the Nerds."


>"I signed my name on the poll for you." Mimi told Matt,edging closer to 
>him.

TOM (Mimi): After another fifty-seven girls beat me to it.


>"How many girls say they liked me?"

MIKE (Mimi): All the girls minus Sora. You do the math.


>"I can't remember exactly but,it was over fifty."


>"OVER FIFTY? Mimi,don't joke around!"

CROW (Matt): I don't want to be the love object of the Over Fifties!

TOM (Mimi): Fifty people, not people over fifty!


>"Matt,everyone likes you!"

MIKE (Mimi): Well, the girls do. The boys kind of resent you....


>"Wow." Matt said, "I told Tai I was the man and on Monday at School,I'm 
>gonna..."

CROW (Matt): Give him a wedgie like I never have before!


>Matt stopped there.He wasn't going to be at School on Monday.He was going 
>to be somewhere else.

TOM: But anyplace was an improvement on school.

>He wouldn't be able to boast his glory in Tai's face,he wouldn't be able to 
>prove once again that he was 'The Man'.

CROW (Matt): Can I borrow your phone? I've got to rag on Tai about this!


>But,what hurt most was that he would not be able to see Mimi until the 
>summer.

MIKE: That, and the rash he picked up in the swamp.


>"Matt,I'll miss you...But,you can't run away and leave TK.

TOM: He'll track you down eventually.

>He needs you more than anyone."

MIKE: It's pathetic when your brother needs you more than your mom or dad.


>"I guess you're right,Mimi."

CROW: Wow, first time ever!


>They were silent for a couple more minutes until Matt decided to give Mimi 
>the object disguised in wrapping paper and sellotape.

TOM: Until then, he was going to keep it for himself.

>Holding Mimi's hands,he placed the gift in them.Mimi looked up at him.


>"What's this,Matt?"

MIKE: Well, open it and find out!


>"Just something that I bought to help you understand why I play the 
>Harmonica instead of a piano!"

TOM: "Why Harmonicas Are Cool" by Robert Zimmerman.


>Mimi slowly unwrapped it.She tore off all the paper to reveal a beautiful 
>white case.It was small,rectangular and decorated with roses.

CROW: And empty. Some gift.


>'Maybe it's a necklace! Or a new type of perfume! Or a watch with a furry 
>strap! Or a..."

MIKE: What do those have to do with harmonicas and pianos?!

TOM: What she REALLY needs is a nice, new brain.


>She carefully opened the box.

MIKE: But the spring caught her finger anyway.

TOM: Ouch!

>In it lay a pink harmonica with a gold plaque.Inscribed on the plaque were 
>the words:

CROW: "Blow me."

MIKE: CROW!


>'To Mimi Tachikawa.

TOM: Wherever I may find her.


>I hope that,one day,you'll look at this Harmonica and remember the guy who 
>gave it to you.

MIKE: Because I sure don't remember him.


>Remember the guy who will always love you.

CROW: How big is this harmonica? The inscription's longer than some novels.


>Please play this too,it cost me loads of money!

MIKE: Yard-long harmonicas ain't cheap, y'know.


>Yours,

TOM: Mine,

CROW: And ours,


>Matt Ishida.'

TOM: 'T the hell? Everyone pawed the pink harmonica and none of them noticed 
the
book-length "From Matt to Mimi" inscription?


>Maybe it wasn't jewellery or perfume or a watch with a furry strap.

MIKE: "Maybe?" It definitely wasn't those.

>It was even better.

TOM: Mimi could exchange this and get something she really wanted.

>Now,Mimi had two things in connection with Matt.They both have Harmonicas 
>but,more importantly,they're both in love.

CROW: Oh, and the whole Digidestined thing. They had that in common, too.


>"Matt,this is...

TOM (Mimi): Retarded.

>lovely." Mimi said,holding back tears.

MIKE (Mimi): Whoa, tears, WHOA!


>"Pink IS your favourite colour,right?"

CROW (Matt): Or are you just a big fan of Pepto-Bismol?


>"Take a look around,isn't it obvious?" Mimi said,laughing.


>"Yeah,it does kinda look that way." Matt told her,laughing slightly.

TOM (Matt): God, when am I gonna get out of here?!

>He looked around the room.Without exaggeration,almost everything in the 
>room was pink.

CROW: With exaggeration, everything in the room was pink.


>"And people say I'M airheaded!" Mimi joked.They both laughed and Matt put 
>his arms around Mimi.

MIKE (Matt): Ha, ha! That's right, honey, call me stupid!


>"I don't think you're airheaded,Mimi."


>"You don't?"

TOM (Matt): I know you are.


>"No.I think you're wonderful."

CROW: So, night is to day as airheaded is to wonderful.

MIKE: No wonder I flunked analogies in high school.


>And with that,Matt and Mimi kissed.This had something extra to it in 
>comparison with their last one.

TOM: The canker sore growing on Matt's lower lip.

>There was no uncertainty this time on the part of Mimi.

CROW (Matt): Mmph...easy...can't breathe....

>Matt meant what he said on the plaque and in his words.

MIKE: This harmonica costs about twenty billion yen and there was still some
doubt in his mind about whether Mimi liked pink.

>Mimi was proud of him,and at the same time,proud of herself for beating 
>insanity and becoming mature enough to see her problems through and solve 
>them.

MIKE: Maturity involves locking yourself in your room and crying? I had no 
idea
you two were so mature.

CROW: Yeah. Ha, ha.

TOM: So funny I forgot to laugh.

>The passion that Matt and Mimi shared was so strong that they could not let 
>go of each other.But soon,Matt would have to.

TOM: But, you just said they couldn't let go of each other, fanfic!


>Matt broke up the kiss and stood up.

MIKE (Cop): Okay, break it up, break it up! Move along, people, nothing to 
see
here!


>"I'd better get going." He said.

CROW (Matt): I don't want to miss my stories.


>"Yeah.So,I guess this is...goodbye?"


>"Mimi,I'll be back in the summer,remember?"

TOM (Matt): It's only two weeks away. Get a grip.


>"Oh yeah.But,I'm not going to be able to stop thinking about you,Matt."

CROW (Mimi): Cramming for exams is going to be a real challenge!


>"The guy at the music store who sold me your Harmonica gave me this really 
>corny line to tell you."

MIKE (Matt): Well, actually, he charged me a buck-fifty for it.


>"What?"


>"Well,this is gonna make me sound like a total wuss but,

CROW (Matt): That can't be helped.

>he said to tell you to,'Let the music play the thoughts that come from your 
>heart'."

MIKE: Clerks have finally come up with something dumber to say than, "Have a
nice day!"

>Matt hit himself on the head.

TOM: He shoulda had a V8.

>"Damn,I can't believe I just said something like that!"

MIKE (Matt): It was the anti-cool!


>"That's the most sweetest thing anyone's ever said to me,Matt."

CROW (Mimi): Too bad you didn't think of it yourself.


>"Oh.Well,that's okay then!"

TOM (Matt): No need to strain my brain if you'll fall for a cornball line 
like
that.


>"Well,I guess I'll be seeing you then." Mimi told Matt.

MIKE (Mimi): I'll always be here for you. I promise I won't move to New York 
or
anything like that.


>"Yeah,see you around Mimi." Matt replied and with that,he kissed her on the 
>forehead,turned around and left,

TOM (Mimi): He couldn't kiss me on the lips? What the hell!

>leaving an empty spot in Mimi's heart.

CROW (Mimi): No, wait, that's just my aorta.

>She looked at the pink Harmonica that nested in her hands.

MIKE: It was laying eggs already.


>'Let the music play the thoughts that come from your heart.'

CROW (Mimi): Too bad my thoughts come from my brain. Now I'll never play 
this
thing.


>Slowly,Mimi put the instrument to her mouth and,remembering how she used to 
>watch Matt,began to play a tune.

MIKE: She automatically knows how to play the harmonica. No need to 
practice,
learn a song, nothing, just start playin'.

>As she played,she thought of the good times she spent with Matt,forgetting 
>the bad times.

TOM: Poor girl's got a total of twenty minutes worth of memories of him.

>The sound she played sang her love like never before.

CROW: In fact, it never had before. This was her first time playing it.

>She didn't care how loud it was.

MIKE: Windows shattered across Tokyo as she blew the giant harmonica.


>She wanted the whole world to know that she loved Matt Ishida with all her 
>heart.

TOM (The whole world): WE KNOW. The sign-up sheet has been turned in.


>Epilogue-


>Mimi Tachikawa sat under a tree on a School Field,

TOM: Not her own school's, this was a different one.

>flipping through the pages of a book,when Tai walked up to her.

CROW (Tai): You're supposed to be at OUR school, not just ANY school!


>"What's this? Mimi reading a book that isn't a Fairy Tale?"

MIKE (Tai): What's this? Mimi can read?


>Mimi looked up at him.

CROW: And slapped him in the mouth.


>"Actually,it's a book of songs.I am a musician now,so there!" She told 
>Tai,sticking out her tongue to him.

MIKE (Mimi): Nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah! Bet you can't read this book, Mr.
Smarty-Upsetting-Shorts!


>"So,when did you start playing guitar and being a rock chick?"

TOM (Tai): As opposed to playing the fool and being rock stupid?


>"I don't.I play the Harmonica."


>Tai looked at her oddly for a second and burst out laughing as he walked 
>away to play Soccer with the others.

CROW (Tai): Yeah, harmonica players are musicians. Riiiight.

>Mimi didn't care though.

MIKE: She was used to Tai's crass behavior.

>Tai didn't understand that the instrument you play isn't important,it's how 
>you play that counts.

TOM: This fic is an inspiration to musical saw players everywhere.


>Thanks to Matt,Mimi knew that.She smiled at the thought of him and played 
>her pink Harmonica to her heart's content.

CROW (Mimi): Well, that's enough for today. My heart's content enough for 
the
next couple of months at least.


>The End.

MIKE: At long last.


(MIKE, CROW, and TOM exit the theater. Doors slam as we return to the living
quarters. MIKE paces the floor alone. CROW and TOM enter.)

MIKE: Cambot, anything from Hokkaido yet?

(Our view of the Satellite slowly pans from side to side as CAMBOT shakes 
his
head no.)

CROW: What are you trying to do, Mike? You got a question for Matt?

MIKE: Yeah. This fic drove me nuts because it never would tell why he plays 
the
harmonica. It kind of implied it's because he loved Mimi, but he was playing 
it
before he met her. There's got to be more to this story.

TOM: Have you tried Odaiba, Mike? He might be there.

MIKE: Worth a shot. Try for him in Odaiba, Cambot.


(Onscreen: a teenaged boy's bedroom. Ishida Yamato, known to his friends as
MATT, lies on the bed, playing his harmonica sweetly.)

MIKE: Oh, that's beautiful. I didn't realize harmonica music could be so 
good.

MATT: (Stops playing.) Who are you?

MIKE: My name's Mike Nelson. These are my friends Crow and Tom. We just got
through reading a fanfic about you and Mimi and your harmonica....

MATT: And you've got questions. Okay. Shoot.

MIKE: Why did you start playing the harmonica? The fic almost touches on 
this,
but never does give a definitive answer.

MATT: Well, I really didn't start playing until a couple of years ago. Until
then, all I could do was this. (MATT puts the harmonica to his lips and 
begins
to breathe through it heavily, making a loud, rasping wheeze. MIKE, CROW, 
and
TOM scream in agony.) Great for irritating adults. Dad threatened to take it
away if I didn't learn to play it properly.

MIKE: Does Mimi play as well as you?

MATT: She says she does. I don't know for sure. She moved to America while I 
was
in Hokkaido, and it's too expensive to talk on the phone much beyond 
"Hello."

CROW: Which reminds me. What are you doing back in Odaiba? What happened in
Hokkaido?

MATT: It snowed. Twice. It only took two big Siberian snowstorms to convince 
Mom
and Dad Odaiba was better. That, and TK started making his own friends when 
he
joined the "Prince of Space" fan club. He even got a new stupid hat to 
replace
the one he outgrew.

CROW: So, you don't miss Hokkaido.

MATT: Well, not much. Just Sapporo Brewery. They have a great tour and the
guides can't see everyone at once....(Smacks his lips.)

TOM: I have a question. What's with the sleeveless shirt and the shock 
treatment
hair?

MATT: Can't tell you.

TOM: You don't know?

MATT: Of course I know. But I have to keep my cool man of mystery persona 
going.

MIKE: I hate to interrupt, but I have to talk to the men who are torturing 
us.

MATT: Torture? That's weak.

MIKE: Well, maybe you can help. You game? (MATT nods.) Hang on a sec. Sirs?


(Onscreen: FRANK and FORRESTER in Deep Thirteen.)

FORRESTER: And how did today's experiment treat us, Mike?

MIKE: Better than expected. We made a new friend because of this fic. This 
is
Matt Ishida, and Matt, these are the Mads.


(Onscreen: a cutaway of Deep Thirteen and MATT's bedroom.)

FRANK: Cool! Can you get me Tai's autograph?

FORRESTER: Shut up, Frank. We'll discuss this after you push the button.

MATT: Mike says you guys like music. I'm a musician. Mind if I play you off?

FORRESTER: Sure! What have you got in mind?

MATT: It's the first thing I ever played.

FORRESTER: Great. Hit it, Matt! Press the button, Frank!


(FRANK presses the button. Credits roll over MATT wheezing through his 
harmonica
and FRANK and FORRESTER screaming.)


>Matt wasn't the type of guy who would push a girl over!


(Special thanks to Jonathan Moss for his permission to use his work in this
project. MST3K property of Best Brains Inc, Digimon property of Bandai Toys 
and
Toei Animation, used without permission.)