MPT3K is on the air! Previous Episodes: 1. A Very Dragonball Z Christmas 2. Always And Forever 3. The New World Ranma Style 4. An AAMRN...With A Twist! 5. All Nighter Please read maximized. ----------------------------------- Disclaimer: Not one of these is owned by me. None. Zilch. Zippo. Not a drop. Like one fanfic author says: "I'm just borrowing them for awhile." ----------------------------------- Original story by Togepi101 MSTed by Pika163 The story being riffed is, "Spin Away" You can reach me at pika_163@yahoo.com Theme Song ----------------------------------- In the not-to-distant future, Giovanni was getting tired, Of having lamebrains failing, So he went up and he tried, He caught a guy named Ash Ketchum, And all his cohorts, too, He shot them all up into space, Where the sky is always blue, (More like navvvvvvvvvvvvyyyy!) We'll send him crappy anime, The worst that we can see, (La-la-la) And we'll have fun watching him go, Into pure insanity, (La-la-la) Now keep in mind they'll have to watch English dubbed shows, They'll have to keep their mind in check, Before they go and blow, TRAINER ROLL CALL! Brock! "Girls? Those numbers?" Misty! "You're hopeless." Ash! "What's hentai?" Pikachuuuuuuuu! "Pika, pika! Pika, pi!" If you're wondering why nobody, Ever wants to get out, (La-la-la) Beware, he cut off oxygen, So just sit down and watch, For Mystery Pokemon Theater 3000! (TWANGGGG) (6...5...4...3...2...Bridge) (It is dark on the bridge. Ash is watching TV, when he grabs the phone and dials someone up.) Ash: Hey, wazzup, B? (In another part of the bridge, Brock is also watching TV.) Brock: Nothing much. Watching a battle, having a Bud. Ash: True...true... Brock: WAZZUP?? Ash: WASSUP?? (All of a sudden, Misty comes on the line.) Misty: Guys, are you using the line? I have to keep it open, I told you already! Ash: Gee, you're fun. Brock: WAZZUP?? Misty: Shut up, Brock. Brock: Whatever. (They both hang up. Then suddenly, at the same time...) Ash & Brock: WAZZZUP??? (commericals) (When the break gets over, All are on the bridge. The rocket sign flashes. Brock presses it.) [Rocket HQ] Jessie: Hell-o. [SOL] Brock: I can agree with the first part of that. (All snicker) [Rocket HQ] Jessie: Shut up. I'm only saying this once, so pay attention. Today is "Take Your Daughter To Work Day", but I don’t have a daughter. So... [SOL] Ash: You're gonna take James to your work? (All snicker again) [Rocket HQ] Jessie: No, you imbecile! I was planning on taking Misty. [SOL] Misty: (sarcastically) Really. [Rocket HQ] Jessie: Yes. And since you need three people there, I'm sending down James. [SOL] Brock: No way you aren't. [Rocket HQ] Jessie: Be quiet, or else I'll make you listen to the song "Funky Town". [SOL] Brock: Er, uh...send away! (In a flash, James is on the bridge, wearing nothing but underwear, and Misty is in the HQ.) James: Wha--....what happened? All of a sudden I was getting ready after my shower and... Brock: Please. Get some clothes on. Bathroom is over there. (James goes off screen.) [Rocket HQ] Jessie: What fanfic shall we send them today, o daughter of mine? Misty: Hmmm...(looks around)...How about this? Jessie: New author...different plot...looks good to me! (turning to screen) Your fanfic today is Spin Away, and it is *good*! [SOL] (James comes back, fully dressed in Rocket uniform.) James: So, what am I doing here? Brock: Getting into the theater, that's what! It's fanfic time! (Bridge...2...3...4...5...6) Brock: First, James, you must learn the rules here. 1: Don't go insane. 2: Don't go insane. 3:-- James: Don't go insane? Brock: No, always wipe your feet at the door. James: Ah. Okay, this is my first fic, so here it goes: All: *groan* "Hey, you guys wanna play a game?" asked Ash, after dinner one night. Brock: (as himself) Sure, I'll go get the Uno cards! Ash: (as himself) Not that kind of game, ninny. "Nah, I gotta get to bed. I'm seeing Hannah in the morning," was Brock's answer. James: Hey, Brock finally gets some! James & Ash: Go, Colonel! Go, Colonel! Brock: Shut up. "I will, so will I, I guess," said the other three sitting at the table, Kamela, Misty and I. Brock: They, however, didn't see the other three people sitting there. Me, Myself and Irene. The three of us went outside and Ash stayed back inside to call some of his Pallet Town friends to see if they could come over too. Brock: *ring**ring* James: (as Prof. Oak) Oak's Lab, who's speaking? Ash: (as himself) Hi, is there a first name, Crotch, last name, Protector there? James: (as Prof. Oak) Just a sec...has anybody seen a Crotch Protector around? (laughs all around) Why you little! Once I get my hands on you.... Ash: (as himself) Ha ha ha! When Ash came back he was holding a plastic bag, too cloudy to see through. Brock: What, wasn't he already in the house? James: Oi...five lines into this story and already we're confused. "Gary, Tom, Sean, Mary, and Hector are coming and Hector is bringing his twin, Genesis, Brock: Hmmm....can she dance? (Everybody chuckles) and Sean is bringing some cousins, Maddy, Belle, and Joey. So that is..." he stopped to count, "thirteen people!" Ash: Thirteen is an unlucky number. Get rid of Genesis. "I don't think we'll all fit on the picnic bench," said Misty, getting up and heading to the garage, "I'll get one of those big round card tables. Little help, Calandra?" I could tell she needed to talk to me so I followed quickly. Brock: SI's. More fun. James: *yawn* "Calandra, I know what Ash is planning on doing." Brock: (as Misty) He's trying to take over the world! All: (singing) It's Ashy, It's Ashy and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain. She said, "He's trying to get you and Gary back together," The sound of these words shocked me. I sat down on the recycling bin and thought for a moment. Ash: (as the author) How much would I get if I recycled myself? "You're right. Ash still doesn't like Gary enough to invite him over... Oh no, what now?" I said to Misty, staring with a strange look of thought on her face. James: (as Misty) The toliet's clogged, you'll have to excuse me. "We're playing spin the bottle?!? Ash just got the bottle out and Gary just walked in!" she answered Brock: Strange that that would happen. James: Must be call of the wild. She was right. There was an old wine bottle standing on the table. I winced. Ash: (As Misty) Uhhh....maybe, maybe we have alcholic beverages! Brock: ..... "Maybe we're just gonna drink the wine?" I said hoping I was right. James: Strange. Brock: Oi.... "Hey guys! Come on!" said Ash, who had sneaked up on us, "Everyone's here!" Brock: (as Ash) Let's congo! Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, dun! Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, dun! "Be there in a sec," said Misty as she motioned for me to help with the huge table. We carried it over to the grass and set it up. Ash: (as Misty) Are you *sure* that this'll help during the Boston concert? I sat down next to Ash and said, "Kamela, sit by me," just as Gary was heading toward me. Good save, I thought, But Kamela has already sat down. I let out a huge sigh as Gary sat down in the chair next to me. James: (as author) Hey, you sat on Mr. Binky! "Hey," he said, acting totally innocent, "This seat taken? Brock: (as author) Well, if you sat on that taco....please check your pants. "No," I said softly. I shot a look at Ash. "What?" he mouthed "Oh, are we acting all innocent now," I mouthed back. He shook his head and asked who wanted to go first. Ash: (as himself) Who thinks I'm innocent, raise their hand! (All raise their hand) "I will," said the lovely Maddy, "So I just spin it and kiss whoever it lands on?" Brock: Unless it's a girl. Then you......buy her a cola. James: Nice save. "Well I thought that since we're older now we could play it with real kisses, not just pecks," answered Ash, to my horror, Ash: (as author) He was watching Friday the 13th! *sob* "and if it's a person of the same gender, you get to spin again until you get the opposite gender," James: Throw out the cola idea. Brock: Feh. "Spin away," Misty said nervously. Ash: (as Pee Wee Herman) You said the secret word! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Maddy spun and it landed on her cousin, Sean. "I can't watch," said Kamella. Smack! Brock: Aww, nasty! James: Maybe she slapped him instead! "That was amusing," said Belle, who was the total Daria type. Brock: And the pheasants rejoiced. All: (flatly) Yay. "My turn," said Sean, who was most likely disgusted. The bottle stopped on Joey and she had to spin again to get it to land on Genesis. Brock: She? Is Sean a he? And isn't Genesis a he? James: I have a theory. Ash: Yes? James: Maybe Hector and Genesis aren't identical twins. And maybe the author misspelled the first time. And maybe-- Brock: James? James: Yes? Brock: Shut up. I couldn't blame the long smooch that came out of it because she is so incredibly beautiful. Brock: (as author) Take my word, even thought you can't see her, she *is* beautiful! When they finally finished, Sean stood up, brushed himself off and walked proudly back to his seat. It wasn't exactly proud when he tripped on his shoelace, though. We all cracked up while Gen rushed to his aid. James: *sigh* Ash: *yawn* Brock: Is this fic trying to pass itself of as comic relief? James: That or Looney Tunes. Probably closer to the second. "I'm gonna spin now, kay?" she said as she helped him up. She spun all right, right to Gary! He blushed as they kissed. James: This isn't exactly the hottest fanfic I've read. But then again, everybody's 12... Brock: 14. James: 14... Ash: 16. James: 16... Brock: 18. James: 18....hey, wait a minute... Not as long as Sean's, though. He was probably praying it landed on me when he spun. We all watched nervously as it slowed to a stop... right in front of me! All: (as author) D'oh! I covered my face with my hands, Oh no, I thought, now I have to kiss him. He didn't exactly kiss me good, but it wasn't exactly short either. James: (as author) It was *long* and *wet* and...I'm stopping. I felt myself blushing as I spun the bottle and it landed on Ash. "You don't have to do this," I whispered. His answer surprised me: "I want to, though," he leaned over and gave me an extremely long, wet smooch with the works. Ash: The Works? Eck. James: "Hi, I would like a pizza with the works on it, please." Brock: Yech. We both looked away and blushed when we pulled away. Everyone stared at us in surprise, especially Misty. James: (as Misty) You go, girlfriend! Brock: I don't think she said exactly that. * * * After we had finished the game, I knocked on Ash's bedroom door. Ash: (as himself) Don't come in, I'm using the poto-pot. "Come in," he said. I peeked in and then opened the door the rest of the way. Brock: (as Ash) Peeping...uh...SI! Peeping SI! "Hi," I said softly, "Nice game. Wasn't it funny when Sean tripped," I continued, sitting next to him on his bed. James: (as Ash) No, it was completley suck-butt, chunkhead. "I'm sorry," he said, unexpectantly, "I didn't mean to say it that way," "Say what?" I asked. Ash: Yeah, that's basically this fanfic. "That I like you. I thought it would be the easiest way. Easier than just telling you," Ash said, "Picachu, could you excuse us for a moment," Brock: (as Pikachu) Come on! Can't a little mouse get some privacy around here! "Kachu," he groaned sadly as he closed the door behind him. All: Geshundeit. "Ash," I said finally, "I like you too," Ash looked up in surprise. All: (as Ash) Score! "Really? You're not just being nasty?" James: Hello nasty. "Really, Ash," then I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, "Wake me up last before you leave for Professor Oak's in the morning, kay?" Brock: Why last? (Silence.) Brock: Ohhhhhh.... "Kay," he answered. I didn't know nor care how he was going to do it but I could tell he had an idea. Ash: He was going to wait, duh. I hoped that it was what I thought it was. I tiptoed quietly into my room, as not to wake Misty or Kamela. I knew they'd see him waking me up in the morning and I wondered if we'd make them jelous. I sure hope so! James: Nice little girl, isn't she? I awoke the next morning to a nice kiss. Ash was sitting on my bed next to me. Brock: (as author) Man, I keep having these nightmares! "Good morning, sleepyhead!" he chimed. "Oh...my...GOD!" shrieked Kamela, waking up Misty. Brock: Man, news travels fast around here. "Who? What? When? Where? How? James: See! This is what filling out too many party inviations will do to you. Oh, it's just Ash and Calandra sitting together on her bed," she mumbled, lying back down, "Ash and Calandra sitting together on her bed?!?" Ash: Repeat that just a *little* louder please. she shouted, bolting up and throwing off her sheets. "There's nothing to see you guys. Brock: Dang, show's over. James: There was a show? Ash: Eeeew... Brock: Not that kind of show! Could you leave?" I pleaded. "No way I'm leaving after that 'Good morning, sleepyhead'" Kamela imitated. Ash: (as himself) Hey, that's pretty good. Can you do Popeye? "I have a feeling that's not all!" said Misty as she was scooted out by Ash along with Kamela. James: (as Ash) Ow, ooh, ouch, watch the cap... "Finally," I whispered as I climbed out of bed. I hugged Ash from behind as he locked the door. Brock: Taking the author's arm in the process. Meanwhile, downstairs: "What are you girls doing still in your PJ's?" asked Mrs. Ketchum. Brock: (as Misty) Hey! I like my jammers! Ash: (as Kamela) Jammers? "Ash and Calandra locked us out of our room" Misty answered. James: (As a little kid) But she hit me! Ash: (As a little kid) He started it! "Hmmm. They did, did they?" said Mrs. Ketchum, laughing. "We'd better get to our meeting. Can we just go in these?" asked Kamela. Ash: (as Mrs. Ketchum) But don't the alien kings like you to come to their meetings in full uniform? "I'll lend you some nice pants suits," she said, and hurried off to fetch them. Brock: What in the heck are pants suits? James: I have no idea. Ash: Dang you, Calvin Klein! Dang you to heck! * * * Four years later, Kamela, Calandra and Ash are 19 and Misty is 20: All: (singing) Let's do the time warp again!! "What do you mean, there's another journey?" I yelled. Brock: (as Ash) It's just another business trip. Ash: (as author) I swear, you take that secertary to *too* many places. "I'll turn it down if you want me to!" yelled Ash, "It's no big deal. I don't wanna leave you, Candie," I smiled at that. All: (singing) I want candy... That was the first time he'd ever called me that. "I love you," I said, hugging Ash and giving him a big, sloppy kiss. James: (as Astro) I wuv wou, Ash! "Okay, I have to go pick up a tux. Be back bye two. Love ya!" Ash hurried out to the closet to grab his coat, he kissed me good bye and left humming. Brock: Humming what? James: Probably "Going To The Chapel". (All snicker) I worry whenever he goes somewhere. I've heard all those stories of car crashes on the way to work or school, or even the dentist. Ash: (as person) Oh man, I hate going to the dentist....goodbye, cruel world! *crash* I try not to think of it, though. Now I'm just babbling. Brock: (as author) Goo goo ga ga....ooooh, pretty ball....goo goo.... * * * "It's time, Cal," said Misty from in front of me. I smiled at her and gather myself up. This is the best day of my life, I thought. James: Until....the ice cream man showed up. I walked after the bridemaids to see Ash standing in his tux as beautiful as ever, smiling. I listened to everything the reverend said, staring into Ash's eyes. Ash: (as reverend) Do you, Ash, take this bride yada yada yada snore snore, oh forget about it, just kiss already. "If anyone has any protests of this marage please tell them now or forever hold your peace," Brock: Oh, so it's not a real wedding, just a marage. (All snicker) "I have a protest!" shouted an unknown voice from behind. I'm soooooooo sorry! Brock: (as person) I didn't mean to protest! Honest! My computor crashed the day before I posted this and my dad had to reinstall all of the software and he didn't install this one right. Ash: He didn't install Notepad? What computer are they running this on, a 486? Well, here's part 3: Misty's POV, not Calandra's anymore: "I have a protest!" I repeated. Brock: (as Misty) Can I get a witness? James: Amen. "Misty, this isn't funny," Ash said between his teeth, "Now go stand over there and look pretty," Ash: (as himself) Wedding decorations aren't supposed to *move*. "I'm not kidding, Ash. You can't marry Calandra! You're supposed to marry me!" At this point, Calandra was crying harder than anyone could ever cry. James: She was also going out in the aisles yelling, "Hankie? Anybody got a hankie?" I couldn't take it anymore. Cal's mom was yelling at me from the bottom of the stairs. "How could you ruin ma baybay's wed-" Brock: Sounds like AJ's mother to me. James: (as AJ) Mah Sandshrew can get mahhied! "Shut the hell up! I don't have to listen to your mindless blabbing! You're her mother, not mine, remember?!" Ash: (as Misty) *My* mother didn't raise me right! I yelled. Mrs. Corcoran just stood there, stunned. Kind of like a cow looking at an oncoming train (oops, a little off track there) James: When she leaned right down next to me and said, "IT'S GOOD FOR YOU!" I threw down my boqouet and ran down the aisle. *I can't believe I just did that* I thought *Why did I do it anyway? Oh yeah, hate Calandra, love Ash* Ash: (as Misty) Eat donut. Go to bathroom. Eat pizza. Sleep. Go to bathroom. I stood up and walked to my car, full of stupidity. Brock: I wonder....does stupidity make you fat? I knew they'd never want to see me again, so I decided to leave. I had to stop at the supermarket to pick up some food on the way home so when I got there, the wedding was well over. James: (As Misty) Pick up some pickles, some ice cream, oh yeah, those little mint things... The two newlyweds were walking down the stairs and I just brushed past them not speaking to either. Ash: What? They got married in a supermarket? Brock: Yeah, get half off from all purchases made the day of your wedding. I heard Calandra yelling my name but I didn't want to speak to her or Ash. *Why did I have to be such an asshole and ruin their wedding* I thought to myself. Just then, I heard Cal start her car and start to back out of the driveway. Then came the bad part: I then heard a screech and three different screams. Brock: (as Ash) Ahhh! James: (as Calandra) AHH! Ash: (as person, flatly) Ahhh. I looked out the window and gasped. TO BE CONTINUED... Brock: (as Misty) There was a "To Be Continued" sign on the window. Horrifiying. "The boy is fine and will come out in a moment, but the girl has only a 10% chance of living," the doctor told Misty and Brock, James: Hey, there I am! I usually get gipped out of fanfiction. "I trust you to tell the boy, um, Ash. I'll be back to tell you more later," she brushed past Ash as she hurried back to the O.R. doors. Ash: (over intercom) Dr. Rosen Rosen, we need you in the O.R., Dr. Rosen Rosen.... "Ash, are you okay?" I asked, "I'm so sorry. It's okay if you never talk to me again," James: (as Misty) I underestand. Do you want to go out for pizza? My treat. "I'll never stop talking to you, Misty," he said, "Now, how's Calandra?" I stared into his eyes. "Are you Ash?" asked the doctor, "I'm so sorry, but, the girl has passed on," she hurried away again. James: (As the doctor) Pizza, pizza, pizza! Then, for the first time, Ash broke down and cried. Brock scooted over on the bench and comforted him. *I can't believe this is happening* I thought, sitting down next to Ash. I knew I looked dazed because Kamella, who just got here, came over and hugged me right away. Brock: Aww, everybody's spreadin' the love! Ash: Yeah, to the wrong people. (Brock hits Ash) Then I did something I never thought I'd do...I cryed my eyes out. All: *dundundun* * * * "Hey, Ash wake up!" I said. It had been three years since Calandra had died. Not exactly, but you get the point, James: (as Misty) She's bit the dust! BWHAHAHAHAHA! "It's the big day!" The big day, well lets just say he's over Candie. Ash: (as Misty) I thought he would never stop eating Hershey bars. "Come on, can't I just sleep a little later?!" He yelled at me. Brock: (as Ash) Mommy, I don't want to go to school! "I'm brushing that off. No, you don't want to be late for your own wedding, do you?" I answered calmly. * * * I was finally having my dreams come true. I was walking down the aisle towards the man of my dreams, Ash. Brock: I don't know if anybody would call Ash the man of their dreams. Ash: Shut up. James: Oh, you can dish it out, but you can't take it, huh? Ash: No comment. "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..." the preacher's voice was drown out by my thoughts. *I knew this was how it was supposed to be* I thought. Ash: (as the preacher) *cough* You are thinking aloud again. "Ash, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?" "I do," he answered the preacher. Brock: (as a preacher) Well, if you have to, there's a bathroom down the hall to the right. "Misty, do you take this man to be your James: Un. lawfully wedded husband" he repeated. "I do," I answered. "I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride," Ash: I thought there was more to that to a wedding. Brock: Time flies when your having....er....fun. James: I saw that coming. We kissed a fairly short kiss and walked down the aisle, hand in hand. James: Awww....isn't it beautiful? Brock: Not really. Let's go. (6...5...4...3...2...Bridge) (BAck on the bridge, James and Brock are just hanging around. Ash comes in from left.) Ash: Hey, guys, look what I found! Brock: My authographed Pee Wee Herman lunch box? (Ash looks at him strange, then countiunes.) Ash: No, it's a bottle! James: Cool, can we play Spin The Bottle? Ash: No, you need girls for that. I'm making my own cola! Brock: How do you do that? Ash: First, count up all the ingredients. Then, put each of them in, lessening a part for each one. Uh, Brock, do we have sucrose? Brock: I think. Probably. Ash: Um, corn syrup? Brock: Yeah, we have that. Ash: Saccarin? Brock: Saccarin's not in cola! Ash: I wanted to make it taste sweeter! Brock: If you want cancer, yeah, it'll be sweeter. (The rocket sign flashes. Brock presses the button.) [Rocket HQ] Jessie: Hello. How are we doing? [SOL] Ash: Great! I'm trying to make cola! Want some? [Rocekt HQ] Jessie: Uh...no thanks. Trying to watch the calories, you see... [SOL] Brock: Can we have Misty back now? [Rocket HQ] Jessie: Well, we have built up such a beautiful friendship in that little time, that I'm keeping her for one more fanfic. I still want to she her pay! Misty: Gee, thanks. Jessie: Oh, did you hear that? [SOL] James: Can I at least come back? [Rocket HQ] Jessie: No, stay there, you slime. Press the button, Misty! (Misty presses a button) (credits roll) ---------------------------------- "Oh...my...GOD!" shrieked Kamela, waking up Misty.