(Everyone drags themselves slowly onto the bridge, looking like they've just been through the mill) LITA: Oooohhh, Gods. . . AMY: That was *painful.* RAYE: What gave Vermillion the idea that I'm into S&M? SERENA: Or that I'd even *think* of cheating on Darien? LITA: Or that I'm a floozy who goes around wearing thongs and hoarding whips and strap-on dildos? MINA: Or that I. . .oh, Gods, I think I'm going to be sick. (She sinks into a chair). AMY: Take deep breaths, Mina! Lita, can you go get her some saltines and Coca-Cola? LITA: Sure. (She runs off, returning quickly with the foods, which Mina begins to consume slowly.) DARIEN: I think what we all need. . .is a catharsis. RAYE: Forget it, Tux Boy. Just lobbing a Cyber Rose Bomb at this sicko isn't going to cut it. DARIEN: No, I'm talking about something a bit more. . .fitting. Has the load pan bay been cleaned since we've been up here? (The girls all look at each other quizzically, then shake their heads). DARIEN: That's a big, yucky, disgusting load of refuse, just waiting to be hurled into space at high velocity at a *very* deserving target. SERENA: MUFFIN! I love you! (She throws her arms around him and gives him a huge kiss). You're a genuis! AMY (typing away at her palmtop): I think I've got a lock on where the creep lives. LITA: This is gonna feel *good.* DARIEN: Luna, can we swing the launch chute into position? AMY: Here's the exact coordinates. LUNA: Done! The lever's the one at the far right of the counter. DARIEN: Okay, everybody put a hand on the lever. . .Lita, I think you should have the honor of counting down to launch. LITA: My pleasure! Five. . . AMY: This is for thinking I'd *enjoy* having my privates frozen! LITA: Four. . . RAYE: This is for portraying me as a simpering sicko who likes being spanked! LITA: Three. . . SERENA: This is for the very *idea* of me cheating on Darien!!!! LITA: Two. . . MINA: Vermillion, you know bloody well why *I'm* doing this, you hentai. LITA: ONE! THIS IS FOR MAKING ME OUT TO BE A SLUT! BLASTOFF! ALL: LOAD PAN BAY. . .AWAAAAAAYYYYYY!!! (They pull the lever. There is a pause, then. . .) AMY: Direct hit! ALL: WOO HOO! (And there was much rejoicing. . .) SERENA: Let that be a warning to all you other sick fic authors out there. . . DARIEN: Even stuck up here on a satellite, unable to use our powers. . .we won't stand for your characterization rape! SERENA: In the name of the moon. . . ALL: WE'LL PUNISH YOU! SERENA: What do you think, sirs? (Deep 13. Forrester is sprawled out on a big beanbag chair, with an ice pack held to his head). DR. FORRESTER: FRANK! I need Mylanta! And Excederin! On the double! FRANK: Comin' at ya! (He brings the medicines on a tray) So, Steve, were you right? Is this *the* fic? DR. FORRESTER: Are you nuts? I couldn't unleash that thing on the world! It makes *me* sick! God, what kind of drugs was that author on? FRANK: Hentai authors don't use drugs! We run on PURE CREATIVE ENERGY! DR. FORRESTER: Like you're such an authority on writing hentai. You can't even get a single story. . .Frank, what are you doing? Get away from that computer! This is no time for. . . FRANK: WOO HOO! I'VE BEEN PUBLISHED! DR. FORRESTER: WHAT? By who? FRANK: It's a brand-new Web site called "Mavericks: Hentai That Nobody Wants You To See!" DR. FORRESTER: Frank, the only reason they published you is because they're *new,* and that means they're *desperate.* FRANK: No, it's not! They sent me a letter saying my story was unlike anything else they've ever seen! DR. FORRESTER: I'll *bet* it is. Let me see some of the stories on that site. (He goes over to the computer and starts clicking around. Hmm. . .hmm, I see. . . FRANK: Well? What do you think? DR. FORRESTER: I think there's a good reason they published you. . .because these stories are AWFUL! They're the worst stories I've ever seen on the Net! FRANK (crestfallen): Ohh. . . DR. FORRESTER: Frank, do you know what this means? We've stumbled onto the biggest depository of crappy fanfics on the Net! And that means BAD NEWS for the Failure Scouts! Somewhere in here is the fic that will cause a total mental meltdown in each and every one of them. And then we'll RULE THE WORLD! HA HA HA! HA HA HA HA. . .Frank, push the button! We've got work to do! FRANK: Once we rule the world. . .can I have my *own* Web site? DR. FORRESTER: Don't make me get out the whips, Frank! PUSH THE BUTTON! FRANK: Okay, okay. . . (PHWOOOO) (As the picture vanishes, we hear Frank mumble under his breath, "I had the tub full of Jello idea first!") * * * (Fade in on Haruka's apartment. Joel Robinson is sitting at a computer terminal). HARUKA: Any luck? JOEL: None whatsoever. Forrester's put triple encryption on all the files. MICHIRU: It's probably a safeguard against Amy and Taiki. He knows he's got two people up there who can disable his system in three minutes flat. JOEL: I think I remember a couple of the old passwords. . .maybe one of them still works. . . (Suddenly, there is a huge crash outside). HARUKA: What the hell was that? MICHIRU: It sounded like a car hitting the building! SETSUNA: I don't think that was a *car*. . . (They all run outside, where they see the ruins of a rocket that had just crashed) JOEL: Ho-ly moley. . .that's from. . . (The hatch of the rocket opens and Chibi Moon and Sailor Saturn pop out, shaken but unhurt). REENIE: Um. . .hello? HARUKA: We *told* you two not to take off on your own! MICHIRU: You could have been hurt seriously, even killed! Where did that thing come from, anyway? HOTARU: We were *put* in there! A trap door opened in the floor. . . REENIE: And then we were shot up into the air! HARUKA: That does it. You two are *definitely* not helping. Now why don't you both go home. . . (The Outers turn to leave). REENIE: We've been in Deep 13! (The Outers stop and turn back around) MICHIRU: You've been. . .*inside*? In Forrester's headquarters? HOTARU: We sure have. REENIE: We saw parts of Forrester's headquarters where even the employees aren't allowed in. HOTARU: We even saw a couple of the secret entrances. REENIE: But you're right. . .something like this is nothing for kids our age to get involved in. So we're going home. Goodbye! (They start to leave). HARUKA: Wait! (She runs over to Reenie and puts a hand on her shoulder). Come inside. . .we'll talk. (The group starts to head back into the apartment, Reenie and Hotaru bringing up the rear. As they walk through the door, when the older girls aren't noticing, they turn to one another and give a high-five). (Fade to SOL2) AMY: So, Taiki - do you think we'll be able to dock the Satellites soon? TAIKI: I don't know, Angel. I'm learning, but it's not like flying anything else, there is some extremely delicate maneuvering to do here. AMY: Please try, Tai-chan, I miss you so much over here. TAIKI: I know. SERENA: Have you had any luck invading Forrester's system, guys? AMY: Unfortunately, no. He's got that thing locked up tight, Serena. It'll take us weeks just to figure out his encryption key. And he changes it on a more regular basis than that. SERENA: How long do you think it'll be before you can get lucky? AMY: It's going to take a long time... TAIKI: But we'll figure it out, won't we, Angel? AMY: Sure we will, especially after we manage to dock the Satellites, because then we can combine our abilities. TAIKI: Angel... Last night I dreamed I held you in my arms again. AMY: What a coincidence, Tai-chan, because last night I dreamed that I was in your arms again. \ | / \ | / \|/ ---0--- PHOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW /|\ / | \ / | \ FORRESTER: Frank, is that button ever going to get fixed? AUTHOR'S NOTES: