A Princess Zoisite MST! - www.ezboard.com The Pucker-Up Forums > Look At Me, I'm A Star > A Princess Zoisite MST! << Prev Topic | Next Topic >> Author Comment Myrnachan Saucy! Posts: 275 (6/29/01 4:23 pm) Reply A Princess Zoisite MST! I bit the bullet and did her 'Sleeping Zoisite'. Never again. I can't write good riffs for her stuff. Would it be too much to ask what Tellu did, to tell me what your favourite lines were? ^^;; MYSTERY QUARTET THEATRE 2001 EPISODE 3: SLEEPING BEAUTY Rated: PG-13 Genre: Comedy. Bwahahah! Writer: Myrna-chan In the not too distant present Way down in the Dead Moon Circus Gym (pronounced Gyeem :P) Queen Neherenia and Zirconia Were hatching an evil scheme They caught a girl named CereCere A flower-child, a pink-clad brat (you bet) Their experiment needed a good test case So they signed up with the Amazoness Quartet And shot her into space (Get me down!) We'll send her cheesy fanfics The worst we can find (la la la) She'll have to sit and watch them all, And we'll monitor her mind (la la la) Now keep in mind CereCere can't control Where the fics begin or end (la la la) She'll try to keep her sanity With the help of her Quartet friends (QUARTET ROLL CALL) CereCere! ("I wanna sniff some roses!") JunJun! ("I'm the masculine one! Go figure!") VesVes! ("Never trust the dreams within the...what was it again?") PallaPalla! ("PallaPalla wanna play with PallaPalla's dolls.") You may wonder how CereCere eats and breathes And other science facts (la la la) Repeat to yourself, ‘It's just a fic, I should really just relax!' For Mystery Quartet Theater 2001 (twang) <1> It's a wall of Chibi-Usas. You beat at them with a 2 x 4 and walk through. <2> It's a dream mirror. You check to see if Pegasus is in it then you have a Lemures swallow it. <3> It's a Dead Moon Circus audience. You perform for them and walk through. <4> It's a massage parlour. You stop in it for a few hours.....then get back to business. <5> It's tankubon #18. You shudder at the events to come and walk through. <6> It's a door. You open it and walk through. Go figure. - SATELLITE OF STUFF - JUNJUN: I'm BORED. VESVES: Count your blessings, Jun, we could be made to read another horrid fanfic. CERECERE: If you want something to do, you could help me with this spell I'm trying to learn. I'm trying to use my Amazon Stone to become so heavy we go back to Earth, but it keeps turning into an elephant, which isn't heavy enough. PALLAPALLA: *sucking her thumb* JUNJUN: No thanks. ZIRCONIA: GIRLS?! STOP BEING LAZY AND GET UP! VESVES: Huh? What's your problem, grandma? ZIRCONIA: *vein twitches on her head* I have a new fanfic for you to read. It's an adaption of a fairy tale, specifically, Sleeping Beauty. JUNJUN: That sounds cute! What's its title? ZIRCONIA: *smiles evilly* Sleeping Zoisite. VESVES, CERECERE, JUNJUN: *turn blue* CERECERE: It wouldn't happen to be written by a PRINCESS ZOISITE, would it? ZIRCONIA: Oh yes it wooould. JUNJUN: DAMNIT! ZIRCONIA: *stuffs a piece of paper into a machine as the yellow blinking light goes off* ALL: WE'VE GOT FANFIC SIIIIIIIIIIIIIHGN! ****** SLEEPING ZOISITE > The Cast >Sleeping Beauty/Princess - Zoisite >Prince - Malachite >Three Fairies - Catsy, Prisma, Bertie >Evil Fairy/Sorceress - Emerald >Queen, mother of Zoisite - Avery >King, father of Zoisite - Neflite >King, father of Malachite - Diamond >Minstrel/Owl - Jedite JUNJUN: Jedite is an owl? Must have been some freakish side-effect to being defrosted. PALLAPALLA: I want a Jeddy Pop! > In a far away land, long ago, there lived a handsome man named King >Neflite and his fair queen Avery. For many years had they longed for >a child. Finally, their wish was granted. A daughter was born and >they named her Zoisite. CERECERE: Hehe. *calls Calaveras on her cell phone* Hey, are you infertile? Uh huh...uh huh...3 bastard children...yes, they are bastards! Did you know you gave birth to Zoisite? Uh huh... ZIRCONIA: I WARNED YOU ABOUT THAT! CERECERE: *cell phone blows up* Damnit! >Then, a great holiday was proclaimed throughout the entire kingdom, so >that all might pay homage to the infant princess. Our story begins on >that most joyful day... JUNJUN: The holiday was known as "Unavoidable Sex Day", in which couples who were forced to marry FINALLY have sex, but they blame their lack of fertility on their bodies. CERECERE: Who says Neflite and Avery didn't willingly do it? JUNJUN: Would you willingly do it with Neflite? CERECERE: Ooh. Good point. >A crowd of lords and ladies proceeded to the castle, bringing gifts >and singing the praises of Zoisite and the royal family. PALLAPALLA: La la la la, Zoisite! La la la la, the one who would be King! VESVES: Queen. PALLAPALLA: King. VESVES: Queen. This is a Princess Zoisite fic. They were so >happy to finally have a princess to grace their kingdom. CERECERE: (as Zoisite) Bless us O Lord...rub a dub dub, thanks for the grub. VESVES: That was baaaaaaaad. >Thus, on this great day did all the kingdom celebrate the long awaited >royal birth of Princess Zoisite. And Neflite and Avery welcomed their >life long friend, King Diamond and his young son, Malachite. JUNJUN: King Diamond? Interesting. VESVES: If he had Malachite, who did he marry? TELLU: Beruche, damnit! CERECERE: When did you get here? TELLU: I had Myrna guest star in my MST so she's having me guest star in hers. CERECERE: Okay. Come and join us. TELLU: YAY! PALLAPALLA: Can PallaPalla suck on your odango? TELLU: ...On second thought, no. *poofs back into oblivion* >(trumpet fanfare) ALL: *imitate trumpets, but instead make a "Wah, wah, waaaaaaaaaaah" sound* >"Their royal highnesses, King Diamond and Prince Malachite!" JUNJUN: (As Diamond) Ooh, yes, people, you love me! You really love me! *blows kisses to the crowd* >Neflite and Diamond had dreamed that one day their kingdoms would be >united. And, so Prince Malachite was betrithed to the baby princess >Zoisite. VESVES Betrithed? JUNJUN: Maybe she meant 'betrothed'. CERECERE: Or 'betruthed', even though that's not a word. PALLAPALLA: PallaPalla wanna suck on odango! Stepping up to the cradle, Malachite brought his gift to >her, looking unknowingly at his future bride. CERECERE: (as Malachite) I think she just soiled herself. The gift was a crystal >pendant in the shape of a rose. He dangled it above the cradle and >Zoisite smiled and reached up a small hand to touch it. VESVES: (as Malachite) No! It's mine! Nyaaaaaah! >In a twinkle of sparkling dust, the three sister fairies appeared - >Catsy, Bertie and Prisma. The sisters curtsied to the king and queen. TELLU: Bertie then threw herself at Diamond and demanded he come back to her. CERECERE: I thought you left. TELLU: Oh yeah! *poof* >"We may each bless Zoisite with one gift," said Prisma. JUNJUN: (as Prisma) The brat doesn't deserve anything more than that! >"Oh, what a little darling!" exclaimed Bertie, looking at the cute >copper haired girl smiling up at her. VESVES: (as Bertie) I'm hungry. Can we eat her? >Catsy was the first to give her gift. "Little princess, my gift shall >be the gift of eternal beauty." VESVES: We all know how superficial Catsy is... She waved her wand and pink sparkles >surrounded the cradle, as soft music began to play. CERECERE: Fighting evil by--*suddenly has her mouth covered by Jun & Ves* JUNJUN: Don't even START! >One gift, beauty rare >Shining copper for her hair >Eyes as green as the stem of the rose PALLAPALLA: Lips that shame the red red rose, baka! VESVES: I didn't know she was a Disney otaku... JUNJUN: Suits her mentality. CERECERE: *hides her Little Mermaid(TM) brand shell bra* ¬¬ >She'll walk in beauty wherever she goes >Next, Prisma presented Zoisite with the gift of song. JUNJUN: Man! That's a weird change of rhythm! VESVES: It'd work...if we sang "NextPrismapreesentedzoiwiththegiftofssssssssooooooong!" >One gift, the gift of song >A gift to last her whole life long VESVES: Until she hits puberty and her voice cracks-OH WAIT! That's guys! JUNJUN: If you graduated from the Vermillion School of Anatomy you wouldn't come to that realization. VESVES: That is so sad. >Her voice as sweet as a melody >Like an angel's her singing shall be CERECERE: *gags* >And so, Zoisite had her golden voice. Bertie approached the cradle. >"Sweet princess, my gift shall be - JUNJUN: A chastity belt! We all know how Prince Malachite seems to take after his pop.. VESVES: Demando sleeps around? JUNJUN: How do you think he got that interesting dress on Usagi when he kidnapped her? VESVES: ...... >But just as Bertie was about to give her gift, the wicked sorceress >Emerald appeared in a dark cloud of purple smoke. JUNJUN: That purple smoke is an insult to green lovers! VESVES: What is it with Princess Zoisite and her hate of Emerald? >"What does she want?" demanded Catsy. CERECERE: (as Emerald) I want your sex! *dance beat* JUNJUN: In that case... (as Emerald) I'm better for you than Bertie, Diamond! Come back to ME! *throws herself at him* VESVES: (as Diamond) Why is it always these two and not Serenity? >"Quite a glittering assemblage," said Emerald. "Quite a glittering >assemblage," said Emerald. PALLAPALLA: PallaPalla think Emerald is repetitive. PallaPalla think Emerald is repetitive. VESVES: We got the point. We got the point. CERECERE: AUUUGH! Stop! JunJun: AUUUGH! Stop! "The nobility, the royalty, and ah, yes, >even the goody goody three sisters," sneered the wicked sorceress. VESVES: Uh..let's see. Prisma + Catsy + Avery = Villains. How are they goody goodies? JUNJUN: They turned good. We villains like to call it "Twitterpated". VESVES: Really? Well, that's never gonna happen to me! JUNJUN: It already has. You feel weak in the knees then--*mouth is covered by CereCere* CERECERE: Please! I cried while watching Bambi! >"Oooh, why that- CERECERE: (as Catsy) DARLING dress! Emerald, teach me your fashion tricks! JUNJUN: (as Emerald) First, eat as many cakes as you can... >"Shhh, Catsy, it's all right," said Prisma, holding her sister back. >"I was quite distressed at not receiving an invitation," continued >Emerald. JUNJUN: Damn that Dark Kingdom mail service! >"You weren't wanted!" said Catsy. VESVES: Shwing! Return to Sender! >Emerald gasped. "Not wanted - oh dear, what an awkward situation. I >had hoped that it was due to an oversight. Well, I'd best be on my >way..." >"You aren't offended, your excellency?" asked Avery nervously. JUNJUN: Cool! It's Avery's only line! >"Why, no, your majesty," replied Emerald. "And to show it, I too, will >bestow a gift on Zoisite." >The three sisters moved protectively in front of the cradle. >"Listen well!" said Emerald. "The princess shall indeed grow in grace >and beauty, with a golden voice and laughter, beloved by all who know >her..." CERECERE: But on the night of August 15, 1995, she will turn into a man! And DIE! JUNJUN: *falls out of her seat laughing* >"What is she planning?" whispered Bertie. >"I don't know," answered Prisma. >"Whatever it is, it can't be good," said Catsy. >"But before the sun sets on her sixteenth birthday, Zoisite will prick >her finger on a rose thorn and die!" PALLAPALLA: Spindle of a spinning wheel. CERECERE: Roses are more romantic, I guess.. >The assembled crowd gasped. Emerald cackled evilly. >"Seize that creature!" ordered Neflite. But before any of the guards >could get to her, Emerald vanished. >"Stand back, you fools!" In a puff of dark smoke, she was gone as >suddenly as she had come. JUNJUN: Didn't she vanish a paragraph ago? >"Oh, what will we do?" sobbed Avery. VESVES: A second line! >"Bertie still has her gift to give," said Catsy. >"Then she can undo this dreadful curse?" asked Neflite hopefully. >"Oh, no, your majesty, but she can help," said Prisma. >"What shall I do?" asked Bertie. >"Just do your best, dear," answered Prisma. >Bertie said to Zoisite, JUNJUN: (as Bertie) Sweet princess, if a man you shall be, having to stand up to pee, not in death, but just in sleep, the fateful prophecy you'll keep, and from this sex-change you shall wake when true love's first sex-change the spell shall break. OTHER THREE: *fall off chairs laughing* CERECERE: Now do it for Fisheye! JUNJUN: It's not his birthday... >"Sweet princess, if through this wicked witch's trick, A rose thorn >should your finger prick, Not in death, but just in sleep, The fateful >prophecy you'll keep, And from this slumber you shall wake When true >love's kiss the spell shall break." >For true love conquers all... JUNJUN: *singing* For true gender conquers all! >But King Neflite, fearful of his daughter's life, declared that every >rosebush in the kingdom be destroyed. From then on, it was forbidden >to plant or grow any roses. So all the rosebushes were burned in a >huge bonfire in the courtyard. The three sisters watched from a castle >window in a small tower room as every last rose was burned. VESVES: (as Tuxedo Kamen) What a revoltin' predicament. >"Oh, what a shame," said Bertie. "All those pretty roses." >"Come, dear, have some cake. I'm sure it will all work out somehow," >said Prisma, sitting on a cushioned stool with her favorite dessert. JUNJUN: (as Emerald) Gimme that! *snatches cake* >"A fire won't stop Emerald," said Catsy. >"There must be some way," said Bertie. >"We could turn Emerald into a toad," suggested Catsy. CERECERE: She'd make a lovely toad. Just the right colour! >"Oh, no," said Prisma. "Our magic is only for goodness and making >people happy." >"That would make me happy!" said Catsy. >"Oh, I've got it!" said Bertie. "I'll turn Zoisite into a little >kitten. Then she can't prick her finger." JUNJUN: GAH! NO MORE ZOI KITTY! VESVES: Besides, cats still have paws.. >"She'd make such a cute kitten," said Prisma. CERECERE: Yeah, she'd have wild sex with her offspring. JUN & VES: O_o CERECERE: I had a cat back on Earth. His name was Artemis...my name was Oscar.. JUN & VES: I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY MORE! >"Yeah, and then Emerald will send a pack of dogs after her," said >Catsy. PALLAPALLA: Want doggy! JUNJUN: Later. PALLAPALLA: *snif* >"Oh..." >"Emerald will expect us to do something," continued Catsy. "And she'll >see what we do. She knows everything." ALL: *burst out laughing* >"Emerald doesn't know anything about love or kindness," said Prisma. >"Of course! That's it! That's the only thing Emerald doesn't >understand and won't expect!" >"What do you mean Bertie?" >"It's simple, Prisma. Zoisite will be raised secretly by three peasant >women, deep in the forest, until her sixteenth birthday. Emerald will >never suspect." JUNJUN: Gotta watch out for those peasant women. >"Oh? And who are these women?" asked Catsy. >"Turn around," said Bertie. Catsy and Prisma turned to face the mirror >on the wall. JUNJUN: In the mirror stood Fish Eye, Hawk's Eye, and Tiger's Eye. CERECERE: You are sick, Jun! Sick sick sick! JUNJUN: Thank you. >Bertie waved her wand and changed their outfits into >peasant women's clothes. >"Us?!" exclaimed Catsy. >"Yes, we will take care of Zoisite until she is old enough to be safe >from Emerald's curse," replied Bertie, changing her own clothes as >well. CERECERE: So they're taking care of her until she's 17? Genius! JUNJUN: ...they should have thought of that before returning her. VESVES: ...Fairy tales suck. >"And we can cuddle her, and sing to her..." said Prisma dreamily. JUNJUN: And breast-feed her... CERE & VES: O_o PALLAPALLA: What's a breast? CERECERE: I'm not touching this one. >"And we'll have our magic to help us," added Catsy. >"No," said Bertie. "No magic. We mustn't use it - for if we do, we'll >give away our secret." JUNJUN: (as Bertie) We're really men! CERECERE: Enough with the sex-change jokes. >"But without our magic, how can we - >"We'll manage, somehow, Catsy. Now, give me those wands." >Reluctantly, Catsy and Prisma turned over their wands to Bertie, who >put them in a magic wooden box and tucked it under her cape. JUNJUN: I'm getting scary flashbacks of Virgin Warrior. CERE & VES: Eeew... >"Let's go tell their majesties now." CERECERE: (as Bertie) Um, your highness...my sisters and I have decided to kidnap Zoisite from you as we've deemed you unacceptable parents. We also are infertile so we're desperate for kids. JUNJUN: Did you have to add that? CERECERE: I could go on about Zoisite's infertility. JUNJUN: O_o >So Neflite and Avery watched with heavy hearts as their precious only >daughter disappeared into the night. Many sad and lonely years passed >for the king and queen. But as time went by, and it grew closer to >Zoisite's sixteenth birthday, CERECERE: Year, day, or month? JUNJUN: Seems like the years went too quickly.. the people of the kingdom rejoiced, for >as long as the purple mountains thundered with rage and frustration, >they knew that Emerald's evil prophecy had not yet been fulfilled. VESVES: (as Mountain) Grumble grumble...I've got a headache. >In her dark old castle, Emerald paced her throneroom, raging. CERECERE: The castle's as old as she is! JUNJUN: O_o Nah, as old as Zirconia! ZIRCONIA: I HEARD THAT! JUNJUN: Eep. >"Sixteen years and not a sign of Zoisite! Are you sure you searched >everywhere?!" She turned and demanded of one of her lackeys. >"Yeah, we searched everywhere...all the cradles," replied her not - >too - bright servant. CERECERE: Told you it was her sixteenth birthDAY. >"Cradles?...Cradles?!...CRADLES!!!" Emerald shrieked hysterically. The >dumb lackey laughed too. Emerald turned to her loyal assistant >Sapphire. "Do you believe it, Sapphire? All this time, they've been >searching for a BABY! Ahahahahahahaha!" VESVES: (as Sapphire) Don't ask me, I just work here. I oughta be a duke, dagnabit! My brother's the King and all! >Emerald held up her magic fan and zapped dark energy at her dimwitted >minions. JUNJUN: Dark-u Hed-ge! >"IDIOTS!!! IMBECILES!!!" >"Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!" CERECERE: WE'RE UNDER ATTACK! *ducks under her seat* OTHERS: *duck* >So the whereabouts of Zoisite had remained a mystery to all but the >three good sisters in the woods. They called her Zoe instead of >Zoisite and raised her lovingly. On this, her sixteenth birthday, they >had planned a surprise for her. JUNJUN: I think we missed something there. CERECERE: When we ducked we missed a couple of paragraphs. Oh, damn. *sarcastically* Anyway, the riff! JUNJUN: On Zoisite's 16th birthday, the surprise was...a free sex-change! VESVES: AUGH! Would you two stop it with the sex-changes?! CERECERE: Jun's obsessed because she always wanted one, neeeeee JunJun? JUNJUN: ¬¬ >The sweet sound of Zoisite's voice could be heard singing happily as >she dusted her small room in the cottage. CERECERE: (as Zoisite) FeeeeeiGGGGGGHTing EEEEEEEeeeeevIIIIIEEEEl BAAAAAAAYYYYY *mouth is covered* JUN & VES: STOP IT! JUNJUN: Dear God, I hope you were deliberately singing badly. CERECERE: No..I was just trying to annoy you with the theme song. VESVES: O_O PALLAPALLA: PallaPalla doesn't get to say much. She shook her cloth out the >window and then went downstairs to see what her three "aunts" were up >to. JUNJUN: That's right, Zoisite! Shake your clothes out of the window! CERECERE: Be naked and free! VESVES: Tell people who you really are! PALLAPALLA: Zoisite's got a lollypop! OTHERS: O_o;;;;;;; >Meanwhile, the sisters had been plotting. >"Now, we want this to be very special...I'm going to design a gown for >her and - CERECERE: (as Birtie) Leave the needles caught in it! MUAHAHA! >Zoisite entered the little kitchen. "Hello, aunt Bertie, Catsy, >Prisma. What are you three up to?" >"Up to?" asked Catsy. "Uh..." CERECERE: (as Catsy) We're just trying to kill you. VESVES: *looks at JunJun* SSW. Sailor Senshi Withdrawal. Involves villains turning on each other. JUNJUN: *looks at CereCere* Better watch out for her.. >"We want you to pick some berries," said Bertie. >"But I picked berries yesterday," said Zoisite, pouting slightly. VESVES: Pick some fruits instead! JUNJUN: Baaaaaaad pun. VESVES: That was a pun? >"We need more," said Prisma. "Lots more!" >"Okay," Zoisite agreed. It would be a good chance for her to get >out...maybe even meet someone... CERECERE: (as Zoisite) Get raped violently.. VESVES: You ALWAYS have to have a rape joke! >"Don't talk to strangers!" >Zoisite sighed. "Yes, aunt Bertie." She put on her shawl, took her >basket and went off in search of berries. The sisters continued with >their birthday plans. >"Okay, girls, I'll design the dress..." CERECERE: With needles.. >"And I'll bake the cake!" said Prisma. CERECERE: With poison. >"I'll get the wands," said Catsy, running up to the secret hiding >place where the box was hidden. CERECERE: And stick them up her...*looks at the others who are horrified* Never mind. >"No, Catsy, no magic, remember?" called Bertie. >"But Bertie, you can't sew...and Prisma has never cooked..." CERECERE: (as Prisma) That's the IDEA! >"Oh, we'll manage. Now come here, Catsy. You can be the dummy." Catsy >grumbled to herself as she stepped up onto the stool. Bertie threw >some pale blue fabric over her. >"Blue?!" >"Yes, lovely shade, isn't it?" >"But, I thought it should be pink." >"Now, Catsy, I've already decided it's going to be blue. Blue will >look much better on Zoe." >"I guess..." Catsy began to sniffle. CERECERE: Pink! PALLAPALLA: Blue! CERECERE: PINK! PALLAPALLA: BLUE! CERECERE: PINK, DAMNIT!!!!!!!!! PALLAPALLA: BLUE OR PALLAPALLA SQUASH YOU LIKE THE LITTLE BUG YOU ARE! JUN & VES: We *really* need to get away from these two. >"Catsy, what's wrong?" asked Prisma from her messy workplace on the >counter. >"Well, I was just thinking, of how after today Zoisite will be a >princess, and we won't have any more Zoe." CERECERE: *sob* He'll be castrated! VESVES: *sighs* >"Oh, Bertie...she's right!" >"We all knew this day would come," sighed Bertie. "We have had Zoe for >sixteen years." CERECERE: Days. >"Sixteen wonderful years," said Catsy, wiping a tear off her face. >The three sisters sniffled. ALL: *snif, snif* BAWWWWWWWWWWWWWL! >"Oh, we're acting silly!" said Bertie. "Come on, girls, she'll be back >before we get started!" CERECERE: (as Zoisite) Hi aunties, I'm home! JUNJUN: (as Prisma) Why, hello, dear! I made you a cake in your favourite colour! Green! PALLAPALLA: (as Bertie) And Bertie made dress in your favourite colour! Blue! VESVES: (as Catsy) And I stuck needles in your dress in your favourite colour! Red! CERECERE: (as Zoisite) You shouldn't have! But my favourite colour is white. >Zoisite wandered through the forest singing as she walked. A little >green bird came along and imitated her song. CERECERE: (as bird) Shut the hell up! >Prince Malachite, out for a ride in the woods, heard Zoisite's sweet >voice. "Listen," he said to his horse. "It's the most beautiful sound >I've ever heard. I wonder what it could be...a fairy ALL: *burst out laughing* ...a >woodsprite...an angel...?" Malachite, determined to find out, rode >around, trying to follow the beautiful sound of Zoisite's singing. CERECERE: *singing* Hello, little echo, how are you today? Hello! OTHERS: Hello! CERECERE: Hello! OTHERS: Shut up. >Zoisite's voice rang sweet and clear through the forest. >I wonder, I wonder >I wonder why each little bird >Has a someone to sing to - CERECERE: Whoa, that's weird formatting. JUNJUN: That's her...song? VESVES: I wonder, I wonder, I wonder why each little Princess Zoisite fic is so icky... >She saw two little birds, one green and one blue, flying together. The >green one chased after the blue one and then they nestled together on >a tree branch. CERECERE: And had adorable little teal babies. JUNJUN: Aww.. >Sweet things to >A gay little lark melody ALL: *burst out laughing again* JUNJUN: How can she WRITE this knowing the truth? >I wonder, I wonder >If my heart keeps singing >Will my song go winging >To someone who'll find me >And bring back a love song to me ALL: *fall asleep* VESVES: Filler space. >Zoisite stared out at the kingdom thoughtfully, from behind a tree at >the edge of the forest. The little birds fluttered around her. >Meanwhile, Malachite urged his horse onward and he was so eager to get >to the voice he didn't notice a low tree branch and fell into a small >pond. CERECERE: This is boring. Shall we duck under again? JUNJUN: Yeah. >"Whoooo?" asked Jedite - owl. CERECERE: Who do voodoo? You do? Voodoo? Who do? JUNJUN: Voodoo! You do Voodoo? Who do? VESVES: Voodoo! Who do? PALLAPALLA: Poo poo! OTHERS: *turn green* >"A prince," answered Zoisite. "He's tall and very handsome, with long >white hair and blue eyes..." >(Malachite, of course...) CERECERE: Duh.. >"Oh, we walk together," continued Zoisite, "and talk together...and >when it's time to say goodbye, he takes me in his arms, pulls me close >and..." JUNJUN: We have wild sex. >All the creatures looked at Zoisite expectantly. CERECERE: Horny animals. >"...then I wake up," sighed Zoisite. CERECERE: Wet dream! Bwahahah! "Yes, it's only in my dreams. >But, they say if you dream something more than once, it's sure to come >true. And I've seen him so many times..." JUNJUN: Can we say, sexual frustration? >Jedite - owl noticed Prince Malachite's cape and hat hanging on a >nearby tree and got an idea. CERECERE: Jedite was tired of being an owl and decided to become Zoisite's love interest rather than Malachite. He went over and took them, while two >bunnies hopped over and took Malachite's boots. Malachite was busy >brushing out his long locks and didn't notice until they were hurrying >off with his belongings. VESVES: (as Malachite) Ooh, yes, baby! You've got the most GORGEOUS hair! *looking in pond* >"Hey! Come back here!" shouted Malachite and ran after them. CERECERE: Forgetting that without his clothes he's buck naked... >"Why, it's my dream prince!" said Zoisite when she saw Jedite - owl >wearing the cape and hat. She giggled, curtseyed and began to dance >with him, singing. CERECERE: Time to duck! >Malachite crept up behind Zoisite and took her hands, joining in her >song. >The way you did once >Zoisite was so startled she stopped singing. VESVES: (as Zoisite) NAKED PERVERT! *whips out the mace* She saw Jedite - owl >across the glen shrugging his shoulders and knew that someone else was >holding her. Malachite continued to sing... >Upon a dream >Zoisite gasped at the sound of Malachite's rich, handsome voice PALLAPALLA: PallaPalla want chocolate. and >broke out of his grip. She spun around and looked at him in surprise. >"I'm sorry," said Malachite. "I didn't mean to frighten you." He >smiled. "But I feel like we've met before." >"We - we have?" asked Zoisite nervously, backing away. >"You said so yourself. Once upon a dream." CERECERE: *yawn* >Malachite sang in his rich voice as he walked toward Zoisite... VESVES: No more singing! Duck! >Mesmerized by Malachite's charm, Zoisite took his hand and walked with >him. From somewhere above, a chorus continued the song as they began >to waltz together by the pond. ZIRCONIA: That's the last time you girls are EVER going to have room to duck. VESVES: *cries* >And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem >But if I know you >I know what you'll do >You'll love me at once >The way you did once upon a dream ALL: *looking rather disturbed* >Zoisite felt very happy. She and her admirer gazed into each other's >eyes, not knowing each other's royal identities. CERECERE: (as Zoisite) I'm Queen Hentai. VESVES: (as Malachite) I'm King Ecchi. JUNJUN: Shameless plug. VESVES: But there's no King Ecchi. At least, not yet.. Zoisite leaned >against the handsome stranger as they rested by a tree. Well, he was >not really a stranger - he looked like the man in her dreams... >"What's your name?" Malachite asked. >"My name..." Zoisite raised her head from its resting place on >Malachite's shoulder. "Um...oh, no!" She moved away. "I can't tell >you! Bye!" >"But when will I see you again?" asked Malachite, calling after >Zoisite as she ran. >"Never!" she answered. CERECERE: Good! >"Never?!" Malachite exclaimed. How could he live without ever seeing >such a lovely creature again? >"Well, maybe someday..." >"Tomorrow?" asked Malachite hopefully. >"Tonight," answered Zoisite. "At the little cottage in the heart of >the woods." Zoisite ran off to the cottage, hoping her aunts would >understand... VESVES: Boy, she's indecisive. >END OF PART ONE ALL: YAY! *run out* *** ZIRCONIA: So, what did you girls think? CERECERE: Boring. JUNJUN: Icky. VESVES: Used songs to take up holes in the story. PALLAPALLA: The dress was blue. ZIRCONIA: A winner? CERECERE: No. It's bad...but not THAT bad, y'know? If it was an original story it would have been terrible. But because she pretty much copied the Disney story she has some plot. ZIRCONIA: Damn. No Part 2 then. ALL: Whew. ZIRCONIA: Only because I've got ANOTHER fic for you. ALL: Damn. ZIRCONIA: *feeds it in* CERECERE: We've got FANFIC SIIIIIIIIIIIIIGN! *run in* TO BE CONTINUED IN EPISODE FOUR IF WE DON'T GET CANCELLED. Myrna-chan wants everyone to know she's the webmistress of Pandemonium even though everyone knows she is. :P Lady Emma Saucy! Posts: 358 (6/29/01 5:00 pm) Reply Re: A Princess Zoisite MST! Okay, Myrna-chan. You didn't go overboard with the fem-Zoi jokes, at least in my opinion, but maybe that's because I like the fem-Zoi jokes. I also really likes references to pop culture or other fanfics, so... well, here's the stuff I liked. CERECERE: But on the night of August 15, 1995, she will turn into a man! And DIE! JUNJUN: (as Bertie) Sweet princess, if a man you shall be, having to stand up to pee, not in death, but just in sleep, the fateful prophecy you'll keep, and from this sex-change you shall wake when true love's first sex-change the spell shall break. OTHER THREE: *fall off chairs laughing* CERECERE: Now do it for Fisheye! JUNJUN: It's not his birthday... JUNJUN: GAH! NO MORE ZOI KITTY! Followed by.... CERECERE: I had a cat back on Earth. His name was Artemis...my name was Oscar.. JUN & VES: I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY MORE! JUNJUN: I'm getting scary flashbacks of Virgin Warrior. CERE & VES: Eeew... JUNJUN: That's right, Zoisite! Shake your clothes out of the window! CERECERE: Be naked and free! VESVES: Tell people who you really are! PALLAPALLA: Zoisite's got a lollypop! OTHERS: O_o;;;;;;; *glances up to Queen Hentai tiara on head* Now, tell me again how I wound up with this thing? Prince Malachite, out for a ride in the woods, heard Zoisite's sweet >voice. "Listen," he said to his horse. "It's the most beautiful sound >I've ever heard. I wonder what it could be...a fairy ALL: *burst out laughing* "Oh, we walk together," continued Zoisite, "and talk together...and >when it's time to say goodbye, he takes me in his arms, pulls me close >and..." JUNJUN: We have wild sex. >All the creatures looked at Zoisite expectantly. CERECERE: Horny animals. >"...then I wake up," sighed Zoisite. CERECERE: Wet dream! Bwahahah! "Yes, it's only in my dreams. >But, they say if you dream something more than once, it's sure to come >true. And I've seen him so many times..." JUNJUN: Can we say, sexual frustration? *takes Queen Hentai tiara off her head, polishes it with her sleeve, and tosses it back to Myrna* Here, you can have this back. Really. "'This must be Thursday,' said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer. 'I never could get the hang of Thursdays.'" Edited by: Lady Emma at: 6/29/01 6:01:22 pm Tellu Saucy! Posts: 184 (6/29/01 5:01 pm) Reply Re: A Princess Zoisite MST! *giggles madly* Here are my favorites: JUNJUN: (As Diamond) Ooh, yes, people, you love me! You really love me! *blows kisses to the crowd* PALLAPALLA: Lips that shame the red red rose, baka! VESVES: I didn't know she was a Disney otaku... JUNJUN: Suits her mentality. CERECERE: *hides her Little Mermaid(TM) brand shell bra* ¬¬ She waved her wand and pink sparkles >surrounded the cradle, as soft music began to play. CERECERE: Fighting evil by--*suddenly has her mouth covered by Jun & Ves* JUNJUN: Don't even START! >"Quite a glittering assemblage," said Emerald. "Quite a glittering >assemblage," said Emerald. PALLAPALLA: PallaPalla think Emerald is repetitive. PallaPalla think Emerald is repetitive. VESVES: We got the point. We got the point. CERECERE: AUUUGH! Stop! JunJun: AUUUGH! Stop! >Bertie said to Zoisite, JUNJUN: (as Bertie) Sweet princess, if a man you shall be, having to stand up to pee, not in death, but just in sleep, the fateful prophecy you'll keep, and from this sex-change you shall wake when true love's first sex-change the spell shall break. OTHER THREE: *fall off chairs laughing* CERECERE: Now do it for Fisheye! JUNJUN: It's not his birthday... JUNJUN: That's right, Zoisite! Shake your clothes out of the window! CERECERE: Be naked and free! VESVES: Tell people who you really are! PALLAPALLA: Zoisite's got a lollypop! OTHERS: O_o;;;;;;; CERECERE: Who do voodoo? You do? Voodoo? Who do? JUNJUN: Voodoo! You do Voodoo? Who do? VESVES: Voodoo! Who do? PALLAPALLA: Poo poo! OTHERS: *turn green* But the best two, were, of course... JUNJUN: King Diamond? Interesting. VESVES: If he had Malachite, who did he marry? TELLU: Beruche, damnit! CERECERE: When did you get here? TELLU: I had Myrna guest star in my MST so she's having me guest star in hers. CERECERE: Okay. Come and join us. TELLU: YAY! PALLAPALLA: Can PallaPalla suck on your odango? TELLU: ...On second thought, no. *poofs back into oblivion* TELLU: Bertie then threw herself at Diamond and demanded he come back to her. CERECERE: I thought you left. TELLU: Oh yeah! *poof* *giggles* You're GOOD, Myrna! We need to co-write one sometime. Tellu eudial Road Hazard Posts: 388 (6/29/01 5:38 pm) Reply Re: A Princess Zoisite MST! *LOL* i loved it! fave lines: >"What does she want?" demanded Catsy. CERECERE: (as Emerald) I want your sex! *dance beat* CERECERE: But on the night of August 15, 1995, she will turn into a man! And DIE! JUNJUN: *falls out of her seat laughing* JUNJUN: (as Bertie) Sweet princess, if a man you shall be, having to stand up to pee, not in death, but just in sleep, the fateful prophecy you'll keep, and from this sex-change you shall wake when true love's first sex-change the spell shall break. OTHER THREE: *fall off chairs laughing* CERECERE: Now do it for Fisheye! JUNJUN: It's not his birthday... PALLAPALLA: BLUE OR PALLAPALLA SQUASH YOU LIKE THE LITTLE BUG YOU ARE! >Zoisite wandered through the forest singing as she walked. A little >green bird came along and imitated her song. CERECERE: (as bird) Shut the hell up! -eudial StayCool and don't go blind when Eudial's World DDRs your mind! :p HMP chan Saucy! Posts: 153 (6/29/01 5:40 pm) Reply ^o^ Chou spiffy, Myrna-chan!! ^__^ Methinks your MST was cvhou good and Princess Zoisite should rot for her terrible fanfics. But then again, her terrible fanfics give authors material to MST. JUNJUN: And breast-feed her... CERE & VES: O_o PALLAPALLA: What's a breast? CERECERE: I'm not touching this one. I nearly died from this line. XD ~HMP-chan~ The soul hunter, Sailor Heavy Metal Papillon! I will give you the most beautiful and saddening funeral procession ever! For the end of the messiah of misfortune, I've decided on incineration! I want you to suffer! Saria sama Saucy! Posts: 127 (6/29/01 5:58 pm) Reply ^_^ yah Myrna-chan! your MSTs are better than anything i could write! well, maybe thats because i always choose fics that arent quite as dsturbing as the things some of you people here find.. but anyway.. 7.7;; CERECERE: Hehe. *calls Calaveras on her cell phone* Hey, are you infertile? Uh huh...uh huh...3 bastard children...yes, they are bastards! Did you know you gave birth to Zoisite? Uh huh... ZIRCONIA: I WARNED YOU ABOUT THAT! CERECERE: *cell phone blows up* Damnit! JUNJUN: King Diamond? Interesting. VESVES: If he had Malachite, who did he marry? TELLU: Beruche, damnit! CERECERE: When did you get here? TELLU: I had Myrna guest star in my MST so she's having me guest star in hers. CERECERE: Okay. Come and join us. TELLU: YAY! PALLAPALLA: Can PallaPalla suck on your odango? TELLU: ...On second thought, no. *poofs back into oblivion* JUNJUN: (as Bertie) Sweet princess, if a man you shall be, having to stand up to pee, not in death, but just in sleep, the fateful prophecy you'll keep, and from this sex-change you shall wake when true love's first sex-change the spell shall break. OTHER THREE: *fall off chairs laughing* CERECERE: Now do it for Fisheye! JUNJUN: It's not his birthday... CERECERE: Yeah, she'd have wild sex with her offspring. JUN & VES: O_o CERECERE: I had a cat back on Earth. His name was Artemis...my name was Oscar.. JUN & VES: I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY MORE! PALLAPALLA: BLUE OR PALLAPALLA SQUASH YOU LIKE THE LITTLE BUG YOU ARE! "Oh, we walk together," continued Zoisite, "and talk together...and >when it's time to say goodbye, he takes me in his arms, pulls me close >and..." JUNJUN: We have wild sex. All the creatures looked at Zoisite expectantly. CERECERE: Horny animals. "...then I wake up," sighed Zoisite. CERECERE: Wet dream! Bwahahah! ~Saria,Zelgadis Koibito,ect,ect. Lady Emma Saucy! Posts: 363 (6/29/01 6:34 pm) Reply hee hee! If Myrna-chan and Tellu co-MST something... can I help? I'll be good, I promise! "'This must be Thursday,' said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer. 'I never could get the hang of Thursdays.'" Myrnachan Saucy! Posts: 278 (6/30/01 3:34 am) Reply Re: hee hee! Three authors at once? That would be interesting. How would we go about pulling this off? Instant Chat or something? ;p Myrna-chan wants everyone to know she's the webmistress of Pandemonium even though everyone knows she is. :P Tellu Saucy! Posts: 187 (6/30/01 4:15 am) Reply Re: hee hee! I'm sure we'd figure something out. And Myrna, if there IS a Chapter two, I WANT to see you MST it. Or else, send it to me so *I* can MST it. Tellu Lady Emma Saucy! Posts: 367 (6/30/01 6:41 am) Reply Re: hee hee! Actually, if you guys find something bad enough, you two could MST it, and I'd parody it. ^_~ "'This must be Thursday,' said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer. 'I never could get the hang of Thursdays.'" Myrnachan Saucy! Posts: 283 (6/30/01 1:29 pm) Reply Re: hee hee! Yeah, there is, but I don't plan to do it for a while. I've got a drama sprinkled with comedy epic planned. :) My mum keeps giving me a hard time about my MSTs, I had to print out all three of them just to get her to read the damn things! Myrna-chan wants everyone to know she's the webmistress of Pandemonium even though everyone knows she is. :P Hotaruchan6666 Saucy! Posts: 365 (7/6/01 4:53 pm) Reply Re: hee hee! Hehe lol!! ^_^ "Monday back from the dead..Tuesday shot me in the head" -STP Myrnachan Resident Happy Hentai Posts: 755 (12/2/01 6:39 pm) Reply Re: hee hee! Okay, Dexter, this is Episode 4. I apologize for bringing this topic back but...people should re-read it anyway. :P Oh, and Episode 3 is nowhere to be found. I think Episode 1 was on the old board. Ever notice that Chrystaline sounds a lot like Christmas? I did too...which is why I made a Christmas layout. 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