"Melodies of Life" (Songfic version of "Nothing to Live For") by Sara Jaye Well, I'd been wanting to write a "Melodies of Life" songfic about Kunzite&Zoisite for awhile now, and out of the blue it just came to me-why not just use my existing fanfic and plug in the song lyrics? :P It'd save me the trouble of getting started on a whole new one, getting stuck, and then never getting it finished. ^_^; So that's what I did-plugged the lyrics into one of my existing fanfics, with a few minor edits. ^^; Luckily, the song fits the story's theme pretty well. ^^ I just hope Zoisite doesn't come after me with a blunt object for this...O_o Zoisite: *shrugs* You already wrote it, you're just mixing it with a song... Anyway...^_^; Angsty story+Sad song=Even more depressing...you know the drill. :P Avoid if you're already depressed or if you don't wanna become depressed. [Disclaimers: Sailor Moon is the property of Naoko Takeuchi and Toei animation. None of the characters belong to me. The song "Melodies of Life" is property of FF9/Squaresoft, Nobuo Uematsu, and Emiko Shiratori. The basic idea of this story is copyright of Heather-sama. ^-^ Thanks, Heather, for letting me borrow it. ^^ *hugs* This story is yaoi, and pretty depressing, so if that kind of thing bothers you, you may want to close this window. Otherwise, enjoy! ^_^] ~ ~Alone for a while I've been searching through the dark, For traces of the love you left inside my lonely heart.~ One moment. In just one moment's time, what was left of my world crumbled around me...the only good left in my life taken away from me. The one person who truly cared for me, loved me for who I was...gone. I am now truly alone in this soulless kingdom. Without you, I feel so cold and vulnerable...just like I did before I met you... My life has lost whatever meaning it had left to it. ~To weave by picking up the pieces that remain, Melodies of life...love's lost refrain.~ Why did you leave me? It wasn't supposed to be this way...you weren't supposed to die. I was...I was impulsive and disobeyed Queen Beryl. Even afer you advised me against it. I should have been the one to die. Not you. But you just had to run in front of me just as she fired at me. You had to take the blast for me...you had to protect me even if it cost you your life. ~Our paths they did cross, though I cannot say just why. We met, we laughed, we held on fast, and then we said goodbye.~ Don't get me wrong, I'm not being unappreciative here. And I know what you said about not wanting me to die...you loved me that much, you said. That you'd give your own life to protect me. Which makes losing you hurt even more. I don't know what hurts more...just knowing you're gone and I'll never see you again, or why you're gone. ~And who'll hear the echoes of stories never told? Let them ring out loud till they unfold.~ Sighing, I wrap my arms tightly around myself, trying to shield myself from the biting cold. Oh, Gods, how I miss feeling your strong arms around me, sheltering me from the cold nights...comforting me when I was depressed...or just holding me because you felt like it. Without you, I am unable to feel any warmth... ~In my dearest memories, I see you reaching out to me.~ I remember the look in your eyes just before you left me, as I held you in my arms. I remember how you told me not to cry, that you forgave me. That you only took the blast for me because you loved me too much to let me die... How you kissed me just moments before you left... ~Though you're gone, I still believe that you can call out my name.~ I can still feel the warmth from your lips on mine...the only warmth left in this cold, aching, body of mine... ~A voice from the past, joining yours and mine, Adding up the layers of harmony. And so it goes, on and on, Melodies of life, To the sky beyond the flying birds...forever and beyond. So far and away, see the bird as it flies by, Gliding through the shadows of the clouds up in the sky. I've laid my memories and dreams upon those wings, Leave them now and see what tomorrow brings.~ I still can't believe you're really gone. I saw you fall. You died in my arms...yet I still can't believe it. This feels like a bad dream... yes, that's it. Maybe I'm dreaming. I'll pinch myself, then the next thing I know I'll wake up with you beside me in our bed...or in your arms. ~In your dearest memories, do you remember loving me?~ "Ow!" I wince, my fingernails digging into my hand. And that's when it hits me like a blow to the chest. I feel the impact so much I sink to my knees, shaking badly as tears stream down my cheeks. I feel like I'm going to be sick. I figured as much. You really are gone. Forever. ~Was it fate that brought us close and now leaves me behind?~ And I am alone. Fated to spend the rest of my days trying to survive the bleakness of the Dark Kingdom. Without you by my side, my only light in this darkness...my only warmth on the coldest nights...my only reason to live. ~A voice from the past, joining yours and mine, Adding up the layers of harmony. And so it goes, on and on, Melodies of life, To the sky beyond the flying birds...forever and beyond.~ I have nothing to live for now. Nothing. Life as I know it has lost any and all meaning it ever had. There's no point anymore...no reason for me to be here. I can already feel myself becoming hollow. A shell of the man I once was...a dark pit of lonely, painful emptiness. I don't want to live anymore. I can't go on like this. It just hurts too much...but I know I can't kill myself. You gave your life to protect me for a reason. I can't-no, I won't let your sacrifice be in vain. ~If I should leave this lonely world behind, Your voice will still remember our melody. Now I know we'll carry on, Melodies of life Come circle round and grow deep in our hearts, As long as we remember.~ I miss you so much, Kunzite-sama. Not a day goes by where I don't think about you, long for your warm embrace, or hear your soft, deep voice echoing in my mind... I can only wait for the day we will be together again... ~ Zoisite's shoulders shook as he glanced at the page of his black leatherbound journal one last time. He had written that entry that fateful day, one week ago...but it seemed like only yesterday. Brushing away tears, he put his pen back in his desk drawer, closed the journal, and slipped it under his pillow. For a moment, he could hear Kunzite chiding him to go to sleep, as it was almost midnight. He looked around for a moment, then sighed. He knew it was only his imagination, as usual. "Kunzaito-sama..." he whispered as tears slid down his cheeks. He got into bed, pulled the covers tightly around himself, and picked up a framed picture of Kunzite that lay on his nightstand. "I love you...I always will. No matter what...I'll never forget you," he choked before slowly setting the picture back down. Zoisite then buried his face against his pillow and curled up slighty, shivering. 'My life is so empty without you,' he thought. 'I've nothing to live for...nothing...' With that thought repeating itself in his head, Zoisite cried himself to sleep. In his fevered mind, a soft, deep voice whispered: "I love you too, Zoisaito-kun." ~ In the cold darkness of the bedroom, the spirit of Kunzite sighed softly, brushing a transparent hand through Zoisite's hair. He hated seeing his little sakura in so much pain, but he'd had no choice...he just couldn't let him die. He'd promised to protect Zoisite no matter what, and he'd kept that promise. "If only it didn't have to be this way..." he sighed as he began to fade. ~End~ Wow, I didn't expect to add THAT little scene at the end. O_o I like it, though...^_^;; *adds to original story and revision* Anyways, until next time, ja ne! ^_^ *heads out, muttering something about needing better closing lines, not to mention better disclaimers*